Spiritual Warfare

RachelP03 · Jan 31, 2015

I know it exist, I know the enemy is not omnipresent, but lately, I just feel like I am overwhelmed. I have prayed and prayed and asked God for peace and for His thoughts. I feel like prayers arnt being answered, and I know its not in my time, but I have caught myself just straying because either way, I'm miserable.

I don't want to stray of course, but I cant shake this. I have started to realize that my breathing is getting difficult and its hard for me to grasp my breath and I looked it up and stress and anxiety is a big cause of it. ( I see a Dr frenquently and Im healthy). I am just miserable each and every single day, and a big part of it is Im not trusting God. It has been so hard for me to trust Him for my future. I want to trust Him, I want to have faith and hope and I am as close to God has I have ever been in life and I try to walk the walk as close as possible and I don't know what more I can do. I just stand here wanting to ask God, WHAT MORE CAN I DO??? WHY CANT I HAVE PEACE? WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY?

I have felt at one point in my life when I went to God for a decision, a life changing decision, one that I really didn't want a year or so ago and I followed my heart and had others pray for me and for direction. My heart changed, walls came down, clarification sank in and signs were shown that this was the route I was supposed to go. I followed and months later, it came crashing down. To this day I am so sure that I did the right thing but I feel deceived from God. No matter who I talk too, therapist, Christians, family, no one has answers and Im not saying they should, but its been over a year and I am still miserable and confused. Im trying to live my life as best as I can, but I feel as if something is missing and its the promise that I truly feel was laid on my heart, but Im having a hard time trusting God.

Im hoping someone could give me words of advice or encouragement or SOMETHING. I feel as if now I walk around partially dead inside because no body knows anything and neither do I and it just dosent make sense. I smile when really Im crying inside and no body gets it. Its easy to say to trust God and to keep going, but how can you?? How can I trust God in the future if this happens again to only be let down?

Rachel

Ugly · Jan 31, 2015

As Christians we like to think that we can 'arrive' and be at a place where we always feel God, feel peace, etc... But a quick breeze through the bible shows that this is not the case. The 'feeling' that God is not there does not equate to fact, and that's what faith is all about. Trusting without reason.
How do you think Shadrack, Meshach and Abendigo felt about to be tossed into a furnace? I'm sure there was doubt, but they held on and trusted, despite their circumstances, and God saved them. Or consider Job. God never really abandoned Job, but from Jobs point of view he felt abandoned, yet he held on to his faith and God saw him through. This is really a centerpoint of our faith, trusting God, even when there seems to be no reason.
And yes, it's not easy, but it's not supposed to be easy. For it's in trials that we grow and stretch and learn. If God made everything easy you would not grow. If you want your faith to grow God isn't going to zap you more faith, He's going to put you in a situation that stretches your faith, so that when the trial is past your faith is stronger. It's never fun to go through, but it is part of what we choose when we choose to follow God.
God doesn't lead us to what WE Think is best, or what even makes sense to us, but to what is best for us in the long run. Our growth is more important to God than our comfort, so don't fret over the choice God lead you to, even when it seems it's failed you, because tragedy is often when Gods plan unfolds and we see the good at the end we couldn't see before.

AuphirahQueen · Jan 31, 2015

RachelP03 said:

Rachel do not give hope because GOD hears you in the wilderness crying out to GOD and always have trust, belief, faith, endurance, and perservance that GOD shall deliver you. GOD cannot LIE because GOD's Word is the Cornerstoner of our faith. Renewing of the mind is important because that is first area the enemy attacks to bring forth doubt. Take out your Bible,open your mouth and begin praying in your home and telling the devil he is a lier: POWER OF PRAYER IS YOUR WEAPON AGAINST THE ENEMY!!!

Isaiah 54:17Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)

17 No weapon formed against you will succeed,
and you will refute any accusation[a]
raised against you in court.
This is the heritage of the Lord’s servants,
and their righteousness is from Me.”
This is the Lord’s declaration.

RachelP03 · Jan 31, 2015

Thank you for this. This really touched me and your totally right. I have been on this journey with God for a year and its been ups and downs like no other as I grow and grow and grow and I feel like now Im being tested. God has been there this whole time and I feel like im at standpoint and just watching everyone live their life when in reality I want to be at a different season. Im going to take your words and in fact I took a picture of yours and AuphirahQueens and when I feel down Im going to read them. My emotions are so back and forth and Im constantly feeling as if I am being pulled from spiritual to wordly and even my closest Godly friends have been distant the closer I walk with the Lord, which has been hard for me. For some reason I feel like I cant talk to the church people and Im in a few classes, maybe that's just me tho, I blame myself. Thank you again for taking the time to write me

RachelP03 · Jan 31, 2015

Thank you for writing me and you are totally right. I was reading one of my devotional books and it said that the devil likes to attack the mind first. I know he does with me a lot because I have been working on other issues like in the past with eating and excercising or physical like hanging out with people I shouldn't, I pretty much have no life, which is okay because I know I am pleasing God, well except for my thoughts which is worry, anxiety, fear and no trust or faith. But thank you again and when I feel down and about Im going to read what you wrote.

Ugly · Jan 31, 2015

Glad it helped. While i am no spiritual giant, far from it, i've been around long enough to understand many of the feelings and struggles of being a Christian, if you ever don't feel comfortable talking with your usual friends feel free to send me a message. Can't promise i'll always have something to offer, but sometimes it helps just getting things out or knowing you aren't the only one struggling.

RachelP03 · Feb 1, 2015

I totally added your advice into my blog

Its helped so much and I keep re-reading it when that worry and anxiety starts to come back Following My Heart: Do you really trust God? (I need to follow my own advice)

GandalfTheWhite · Feb 1, 2015

Rachel, sometimes it so difficult to let go and trust in God. I know, I am in a similar situation in my life right now. No matter how I pray it feels like God is just too far and it sometimes end up in me not praying at all.

All I can tell you is that God has a plan and that His plan is always perfect. We don’t understand and most of the times we frown but when we look back at situations in our lives we recognize God’s hand and guidance. I can imagine when Yeshua was on the cross and He said “Eloi Eloi Lama Sabachthani” he felt alone, he was desperate just like we get sometimes… Sometimes when we pray we also shout My God my God why has thou forsaken me? But it is in these times we should just sit still and wait for the presence of the Creator because he will answer you. Even if it takes three days (or a longer season) he will pick you up from your knees and make you whole again. I wish I could encourage you to be strong but all I can do is to have a listening ear and to pray with you that God will make His presence felt in your life. Remember that He sees you as a princess and that we are segula in His hand. Segula is this valuable treasure that the King will not entrust to anybody else. That is why John says “I give them eternal life and they shall never perish; no one shall snatch them from my hand.”

Ugly · Feb 1, 2015

RachelP03 said:

I glanced over your blog. I see i had special mention, i feel so honored 'you're too ugly'.

hahaha

But yeah, a few years ago i decided i was going to make a more solid effort than ever to trust God and hand the reigns over to Him. I was amazed at what a terrifying experience that was. And sad to say i did not stick it out. It's funny how it seems so logical to trust God, almost seems ridiculous not to. We go around encouraging others to do so and providing all sorts of reasons why they should, but when we realize how much we are truly lacking in that area ourselves and decide to take the leap it suddenly becomes paralyzing. Yet just the day before it seemed silly not to. I suppose it goes to show just how deep peoples needs to be in control are. And this is probably more true in people with anxiety issues as many times what can cause it, or add to it at least, is the feeling of not being in control of your life. So it would make sense, in reality, that you would have an anxiety reaction to all this. And though your legs are wobbling and your doubts are coming like fiery arrows you're still holding on, even if it's just by a thread.
So even if you fail this time around, you can be proud of yourself that you put up a fight till the end. And remember even if you don't sustain this time, that doesn't mean there isn't another chance down the road. You may just need more chances to actively exercise your faith. If you do fail, don't look at it as evidence against you but a chance to learn so that you can move forward with a better understanding. Whether you cave in or hold through and see it till the end remember both of these have lessons you can take into your life to apply. This is Gods specialty remember, bringing good and learning and growth from the bad things in our life. Don't deny Him, or yourself, that lesson.
Who knows though, perhaps you will be able to fight through this trial period and hold on.

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight

John 16:33
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

Pemican · Feb 1, 2015

RachelP03,

I'm going to give you a link to a web site I created.
I don't know if it will help you but perhaps it will.
The specific link takes you to a series of pages on the
identity of the believer in Christ. It works sort of like
flash cards with one verse per page, dealing with specific topics.
If this topic isn't quite right, go to the index page and look for
a topic that interests you or you think will speak to your need.
I created this site for my own use, but I realized if it helps me
it probably will do someone else some good as well, so I polished
it up a bit for others to view.

Bible Verse Meditations

jb · Feb 1, 2015

RachelP03 said:

I know it exist, I know the enemy is not omnipresent, but lately, I just feel like I am overwhelmed. I have prayed and prayed and asked God for peace and for His thoughts. I feel like prayers arnt being answered, and I know its not in my time, but I have caught myself just straying because either way, I'm miserable.

I don't want to stray of course, but I cant shake this. I have started to realize that my breathing is getting difficult and its hard for me to grasp my breath and I looked it up and stress and anxiety is a big cause of it. ( I see a Dr frenquently and Im healthy). I am just miserable each and every single day, and a big part of it is Im not trusting God. It has been so hard for me to trust Him for my future. I want to trust Him, I want to have faith and hope and I am as close to God has I have ever been in life and I try to walk the walk as close as possible and I don't know what more I can do. I just stand here wanting to ask God, WHAT MORE CAN I DO??? WHY CANT I HAVE PEACE? WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY?

I have felt at one point in my life when I went to God for a decision, a life changing decision, one that I really didn't want a year or so ago and I followed my heart and had others pray for me and for direction. My heart changed, walls came down, clarification sank in and signs were shown that this was the route I was supposed to go. I followed and months later, it came crashing down. To this day I am so sure that I did the right thing but I feel deceived from God. No matter who I talk too, therapist, Christians, family, no one has answers and Im not saying they should, but its been over a year and I am still miserable and confused. Im trying to live my life as best as I can, but I feel as if something is missing and its the promise that I truly feel was laid on my heart, but Im having a hard time trusting God.

Im hoping someone could give me words of advice or encouragement or SOMETHING. I feel as if now I walk around partially dead inside because no body knows anything and neither do I and it just dosent make sense. I smile when really Im crying inside and no body gets it. Its easy to say to trust God and to keep going, but how can you?? How can I trust God in the future if this happens again to only be let down?

Rachel

You can find a few simple studies Here, Here, Here, Here, Here and Here to help you with your faith in the Lord Jesus...

John 3v16, 1Cor 10v13, Eph 2v4, 3v18-20, Heb 13v5, 1John 4v8,16...

Yahweh Shalom

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Spiritual Warfare

RachelP03

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Ugly

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Pemican

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jb

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