Text to an ex...

I did that once and ended up getting married.

Lol.

I'm just gonna be completely honest: I'm not surprised you're talking to her again.

I kind of figured that you'd go right back. I know that sounds very harsh, and it is not my intention to hurt your feelings....but just by what you were giving off, I figured as much.

I really hope that you find your value and worth in God. I think I'm done giving advice. You are going to do what you're going to do, and as much advice as so many people are telling you, you keeping going back to a person who is so toxic that you don't even know because it seems that you aren't even fully aware of your worth.

And that is what saddnes me. Someone (you) who has so much value and doesn't even know it.

^This.

Mitspa? Can you my uncle or cousin? I imagine you're a lot of fun at a dinner table or while watching a game.

Everyone has been there, buddy. The best thing to do is not vent on CC, but find a few male friends and chill. Make sense of things in your own way, and then roll.

Then you'll be more mature and the chicks will dig you way more. She'll be in the rear view mirror and you'll find someone who won't be this emotionally draining.

Unless being emotionally drained is your thing.

Exception to every rule?

You are simply drawn to her. The question is does she feel the same way about you? She might not know for sure how she feels about you right now but being away from each other you both can realize a lot of things. Love changes everything. Love always finds a way even if we think we know better than love. It's pretty normal for your heart to feel like rushing. And it's rare to find someone you are drawn to and you feel like you will not find someone like that person again. I can relate because its it's been more than a year and I'm still yearning for one person. The more you fight the feeling the more it sticks. I think only time will tell when the chains around your heart will be broken.

Bahahaha.

I love how different male advice is from female advice in this thread.

Actually in general. Our God is an awesome creator with a real sense of humor.

Its a trick...the further they pull you into a emotional conversation the more and more you lose your ability for rational thought and logic

Yeah, you have to effectively feign emotion as a survival mechanism.

Why cant they love us the way we are ?

Well I'm talking a little tongue-in-cheek here, but I think the women worth being with are looking for a man. Somebody who allows logic kind of transcend their emotion. Not necessarily cold and stoic, but at base rational and a tad insensitive.

I used to be extremely poetic/sensitive but I am not anymore because an ingrate of a chick beat it out of me. Someone a lot like the girl T Laurich is with from what I can ascertain.

But yeah, I don't know.

I mean seriously, Mr. Darcy is the perfect example of what women dig and he isn't an artistic dilatant.

Oh no, he's a brooding and somewhat rude nut to crack.

I think the best way for you to maintain perspective and requisite levels of manliness is to just chill with your wolf pack.

My wolf pack saved my sanity. Seriously.

Tony, I'm sorry you're hurting. I do agree with those who are telling you to get away from the young woman who is not emotionally available for you. You already know how she is, so you can pretty much expect it's not going to change.

Here's my question to you, dear ~ wouldn't you rather be with someone who desires your company as much as you desire theirs? Let your heart heal and don't keep going back into that situation because it's only going to open that wound back up.

Anddddd, if my comment came off as insensitive, I'm sorry.

I truly am sorry you are hurting. I just am very direct and I feel that it can come off as very insensitive to some people's emotions. But know this, I'm direct because I care about people's value and worth. I hope you actually understand how much value you have to God. Because once you do, you will never surround yourself with toxic relationships. Ever. Because you know you are more of worth and value.

I know what you're doing. She is your first love. She doesn't love you back. You went off and pictured your life with her. She has no such dreams. You said you're over her.

No you're not!

"Over" take a bit more than voicing it. There's an emotional connection, (whether it is returned or not), physical, (doesn't mean sex has to be involved, but man, you're really stuck on she's hot), spiritual, (did that even exist? IDK, but it wasn't returned, so it doesn't matter, because it wasn't there even if you thought it was), and mental connection.

Just about every person on this site has had a first love. Most didn't work out. The more painful stories include marrying the person after it was over. We all come baggage. Right now you're carrying walk-on luggage. Don't pack the trunks too. Leave with just walk-on, because it is only going to get worse after this if you keep going.

When a woman says, "but we can stay friends," at best, she's saying, "because I never had those kinds of feelings for you, but you seem like a nice guy." If you feel the same thing, you really can be friends. If you felt more, no! You can't!

What you're feeling is the breakup depression. Yes. It hurts. It is death, so it hurts. (Death of a relationship, of your dreams, of your desires.) Don't let it turn worse by trying to avoid it. It's the difference between having a wisdom tooth removed without being knocked out and then choosing to suck on the bare spot until you get dry socket! Yes! It really hurts. Go through it instead of dwell in it, because dry socket is worse.

Live through it, but get through it instead of wallowing in it.

Because you don't want to be as nuts as Solomon was and have hundreds and hundreds of wives? You only want one, so "they" don't have to love you for who you are. Only "she" does. A sure way of finding the ONE!

(All the rest of us want to change you.)

You gotta know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run...