Today I asked my Husband when he was going to lunch and if he would mind if the dog and met him somewhere? He told me that he'd let me know. So he called me this morning and I said we'd meet him there. I'm not familiar with the place and I was confused trying to find it. I pulled over and sent hi a text and said, I can't find this place. Wait a couple minutes, no response. I call, speakerphone, no answer. So I drive and look. I couldn't find it. I call again and again no answer. I was not mad but sad that he wouldn't even call to see where I was. I was hurt, I love him but often times he just does the things like not check and see if I'm okay when late or think about turning his phone on when we're supposed to do something or meet.
Also it's always me who plans for us to do something. Like a movie or dinner out something like that. He doesn't take the initiative. He doesn't find the sitter. It's all me. One time he came into my laundromat job and I was going to close in a couple of minutes. The parking lot is dark the neighborhood is sketchy and I get nervous when I go to my car. He was just going to go, he wasn't going to wait for me. I'm his wife, doesn't he care that I might get mugged? I have talked to him about it, but today just royally ticked me off. I finally found the place. I pull up and by this time I looked like crap because I had been crying. So I motion for to come over because there were two of coworkers and I didn't want them to see me. His friend comes over and he didn't recognize me, so asks me what I need, I said, Dave. He apologized and said I'm sorry I didn't recognize your car Jen, I said that's ok. So he comes over and I said, I couldn't find the place I be been calling you for 20 minutes. I didn't yell I was just crying. He said, oh sorry my phone is in the truck. I asked, did you not wonder if I was coming? He said well yeah. I took the dog out of the car and gave her some water and just sat there. His friends and him talked for a couple of minutes, then they had to go and it was just him and I. He said, it's nice out today, I said, yeah it is. I wasn't rude, I was hurt and frankly shocked and tired of feeling like I'm not important enough for him to pick up his damn phone and find out if I'm dead or alive.
I know he doesn't mean to hurt me, but it does hurt me when he does that. I honestly felt like he didn't want me there so he avoided the phone. It's been 17 years of me being the one to ask to spend time alone together. 17 years of me asking. 17 years of feeling rejected in this sense. 17 years of him getting mad when I feel like this. I didn't put this in the ladies forum because I want a mans perspective. I forgot about the family forum and I just don't want to type this all over again.
He's a very laid back person, I get that, he's a good Dad and a good provider and I love him. But I'm so tired of hurting about this. Am I overreacting?
Also it's always me who plans for us to do something. Like a movie or dinner out something like that. He doesn't take the initiative. He doesn't find the sitter. It's all me. One time he came into my laundromat job and I was going to close in a couple of minutes. The parking lot is dark the neighborhood is sketchy and I get nervous when I go to my car. He was just going to go, he wasn't going to wait for me. I'm his wife, doesn't he care that I might get mugged? I have talked to him about it, but today just royally ticked me off. I finally found the place. I pull up and by this time I looked like crap because I had been crying. So I motion for to come over because there were two of coworkers and I didn't want them to see me. His friend comes over and he didn't recognize me, so asks me what I need, I said, Dave. He apologized and said I'm sorry I didn't recognize your car Jen, I said that's ok. So he comes over and I said, I couldn't find the place I be been calling you for 20 minutes. I didn't yell I was just crying. He said, oh sorry my phone is in the truck. I asked, did you not wonder if I was coming? He said well yeah. I took the dog out of the car and gave her some water and just sat there. His friends and him talked for a couple of minutes, then they had to go and it was just him and I. He said, it's nice out today, I said, yeah it is. I wasn't rude, I was hurt and frankly shocked and tired of feeling like I'm not important enough for him to pick up his damn phone and find out if I'm dead or alive.
I know he doesn't mean to hurt me, but it does hurt me when he does that. I honestly felt like he didn't want me there so he avoided the phone. It's been 17 years of me being the one to ask to spend time alone together. 17 years of me asking. 17 years of feeling rejected in this sense. 17 years of him getting mad when I feel like this. I didn't put this in the ladies forum because I want a mans perspective. I forgot about the family forum and I just don't want to type this all over again.
He's a very laid back person, I get that, he's a good Dad and a good provider and I love him. But I'm so tired of hurting about this. Am I overreacting?
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