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Thread: The Terrible Advice Thread

  1. #381
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Mem View Post
    If everyone's always asking for your advice, but nobody ever listens to it, then you might as well give terrible advice.

    Don't pass down any wisdom you might have obtained from doing stupid stuff.*

    *Did ya see what I did there, eh?
    no,retype this all over again!
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


  2. #382
    Moderator AlaynaJ's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Don't die. It's bad for your health.
    joefizz, NoNameMcgee and Angela_s like this.
    "Don't eat casseroles in the dark." -MissCris

  3. #383
    Senior Member SovereignGrace's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    If you have a terrible headache, drop an anvil on your foot to take the pain away from your headache.
    joefizz likes this.
    "What the heart loves, the will chooses, and the mind justifies."

    Thomas Cranmer

    "A time will come when instead of shepherds feeding the sheep, the church will have clowns entertaining the goats."

    Charles Spurgeon

    “The chief danger that confronts the coming century will be religion without the Holy Ghost, Christianity without Christ, forgiveness without repentance, salvation without regeneration, politics without God, heaven without hell.”

    William Booth

  4. #384
    Senior Member WineRose's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    If you hate rap music, befriend someone who always listens to that stuff, and that would build your tolerance!
    joefizz likes this.
    The odd one out on CC, in more ways than one.

    "Meow, wahhhh ah mew meeeeeow mrraow ah purrr rraaow?!"

    (Translation: Hey, can you please stop asking if this is a dating site?!)

    - My 7-year old Scottish Shorthair.


    :P

  5. #385
    Senior Member Scotty's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Go ahead and eat that week old burrito you found under your bed. It has great nutritional value! Also, don't worry about the green stuff growing on it. It'll just make it taste better.
    Laish, joefizz and Angela_s like this.
    JUST BELIEVE
    EVERYTHING is possible for him who believes. -Mark 9:23
    I can do ALL things in Christ who strengthens me! -Philippians 4:13
    With men this is impossible but with God ALL things are possible. -Matthew 19:26


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  6. #386
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Talk about yourself in the the third person with everyone you meet!
    Laish likes this.
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


  7. #387
    Senior Member posthuman's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by joefizz View Post
    Talk about yourself in the the third person with everyone you meet!
    Talk about everyone you meet in 3rd person! instead of directly interacting with them, stick to detailed, factual descriptions of what they are doing and how they appear!

  8. #388
    Senior Member WineRose's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Who wants to talk about themselves in third person when they can talk about themselves in second person?!
    posthuman, Mem, joefizz and 1 others like this.
    The odd one out on CC, in more ways than one.

    "Meow, wahhhh ah mew meeeeeow mrraow ah purrr rraaow?!"

    (Translation: Hey, can you please stop asking if this is a dating site?!)

    - My 7-year old Scottish Shorthair.


    :P

  9. #389


    Mem
    Mem is offline
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by joefizz View Post
    no,retype this all over again!
    When late to a meeting with your boss, just smile and extend a hand to shake saying, "Sorry, I had to poop and stuff."
    Every word of Godis pure (tried; tested; refined).- Prov 30:5

  10. #390
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Practice karate by busting a hole in a wall it's good practice!
    Mem and Laish like this.
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


  11. #391
    Senior Member Laish's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Everyone listen to Joefizz . He is a medical doctor (M.D.) and gives great medical advice.
    Blessings
    Bill
    SovereignGrace and joefizz like this.
    God's Grace is sufficient.

    God wants full custody of your children.
    Not just weekend visits.

    We are entertaining the goats while we should be feeding the sheep.
    Charles Spurgeon

  12. #392
    Senior Member SovereignGrace's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Play hide and seek in a field laced with land minds and poison ivy.
    Mem, Laish and joefizz like this.
    "What the heart loves, the will chooses, and the mind justifies."

    Thomas Cranmer

    "A time will come when instead of shepherds feeding the sheep, the church will have clowns entertaining the goats."

    Charles Spurgeon

    “The chief danger that confronts the coming century will be religion without the Holy Ghost, Christianity without Christ, forgiveness without repentance, salvation without regeneration, politics without God, heaven without hell.”

    William Booth

  13. #393
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SovereignGrace View Post
    Play hide and seek in a field laced with land minds and poison ivy.
    Land MINDS and poison ivy...hmmm...a field day for sure....
    AWV

  14. #394
    Senior Member SovereignGrace's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Susanna View Post
    Land MINDS and poison ivy...hmmm...a field day for sure....
    Oopsy...land mines. My mind must have went BOOM.
    Laish likes this.
    "What the heart loves, the will chooses, and the mind justifies."

    Thomas Cranmer

    "A time will come when instead of shepherds feeding the sheep, the church will have clowns entertaining the goats."

    Charles Spurgeon

    “The chief danger that confronts the coming century will be religion without the Holy Ghost, Christianity without Christ, forgiveness without repentance, salvation without regeneration, politics without God, heaven without hell.”

    William Booth

  15. #395
    Senior Member SovereignGrace's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Tell posthuman...AKA bones...to go play with some dogs.

    #HereRover!!
    Laish likes this.
    "What the heart loves, the will chooses, and the mind justifies."

    Thomas Cranmer

    "A time will come when instead of shepherds feeding the sheep, the church will have clowns entertaining the goats."

    Charles Spurgeon

    “The chief danger that confronts the coming century will be religion without the Holy Ghost, Christianity without Christ, forgiveness without repentance, salvation without regeneration, politics without God, heaven without hell.”

    William Booth

  16. #396
    Senior Member MichaelOwen's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    If you have a head cold, try tying a knot in your neck so it won't get to your chest

  17. #397
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Laish View Post
    Everyone listen to Joefizz . He is a medical doctor (M.D.) and gives great medical advice.
    Blessings
    Bill
    Yes listen to Joefizz he knows all about what ails you and if he doesn't then you weren't ailing anyhow lol!
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


  18. #398
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Take everyone literally when they speak metaphorically,like when someone says "spill the beans" find a can of beans and spill them,or when someone says "and I'm frank sinatra" believe the person and get their autograph!
    Susanna and Angela_s like this.
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


  19. #399
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by joefizz View Post
    Take everyone literally when they speak metaphorically,like when someone says "spill the beans" find a can of beans and spill them,or when someone says "and I'm frank sinatra" believe the person and get their autograph!
    Oh...please don't spill your guts, then...Lol.
    joefizz likes this.
    AWV

  20. #400
    Senior Member joefizz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Terrible Advice Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Susanna View Post
    Oh...please don't spill your guts, then...Lol.
    I won't I am rather attached to my guts,but you "might consider breaking a leg for Hollywood"!
    Susanna likes this.
    God I am but your servant to command have your holy spirit have me speak truth!
    If you don't believe in true love then please don't tell me not to believe in it because I believe it to be real.
    Jesus your sacrifice is worth more than everyone's works.
    satan ye vile tempter seek me as your target and I'll be waiting with a bible in hand,a song in my heart,and truth ringing in your ears forever.
    Derail,randomness and humor=Joefizz the king of fizzy randomness.


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