The problem with Christians...

In my area of work, horrible things happen to people everyday. I can't tell you how many times someone of faith will give someone who has just gone through a horrific ordeal, a kind word or offer prayer. That is always a good thing. I'm Christian. I pray for my co-workers and clients, both with and without their knowledge. It's important to keep God in the details and at our ears, mouth and feet. I was very excited to get on CC. It has been nice talking to some people about God and having a good network for prayer both given and received.

I do take issue when I see some posts in which fellow "Christians" are passing judgement as though they are judge and jury. The authority on good and evil and the end-all be-all. Suddenly the phrase "the problem with Christians is..." (fill in the blanks) comes to mind. I have heard the phrase so often in both my professional and personal life, but sadly, now I now have to admit... I kind of understand where they are coming from.

If I were a newer Christian or someone wavering in my belief, I don't think that SOME of the recommendations given here are 1). Biblical and 2). Comments are stated in a way that would have alienated me had I not experienced God for myself. I get why so many people get turned off by professing Christians. Some of the responses to people who are being honest about their struggles are being met with judgement, contempt and a condemnation. I do not believe, we as Christians, should downplay the values and commandments the God sets for us. I do not believe in political correctness when it comes to human salvation. That being said, there is a way to convey God's word without belittling, chastising, and telling people they are going to hell for making mistakes and trying to get it right. It's not helpful and if anything, this mentality pushes new Christians, those wanting to learn about Christ, and sometime long time Christians away from His holy word. I wonder... Do people who this unto others really think they are being helpful, or do they need to address some things in their own spiritual life?

Not sure why you posted this twice.

And the majority of what you see come from the BDF, but not exclusively. These people don't change.

It's posted twice in case you wanted to read it more than once

The real problem with christians is there are so many tares among the wheat. But it will all be sorted out at the harvest.

Well said..

So many goats among the sheep could have been another good use of Holy Bible symbolism...

My smiley face didn't show up after that comment about reading it more than once. I'm sorry if that came off rude.

I agree. It's a shame. God sets forth a standard in how we should interact with others. It's a shame when people put their own ego into the equation. Jesus did not snub people. He had a dialog with sinners for understanding, not to crush them to make Himself feel better. It breaks my heart that some people are pushing new/inquiring Christians away with their sharp tongues and stonch judgemental, self-serving need to be better than someone else. We are ALL sinners. Heaven forbid some one is going through a rough patch or is struggling to understand how best to apply God's word to their life. I don't know about some people, but for me, life can be messy. It's awesome that some elite, holier than thou professing Christians seem to know what to do at any given moment, but for the rest of us who experience less than perfect circumstances in life, things can be confusing.

it seems you have been hurt, for which i sorrow with you.

i'm reluctant to speak ill of the Church God loves, and Christ died for. what helps me in situations like this is to remember God is faithfully purifying His own in the timing He knows is best, and that there are most likely hidden things people are undergoing that cause us to behave in a manner we ought not.

ask God for love for us, because love covers a multitude of sins.

I like that notinmytown. That is the correct attitude to have regarding others. Yes I have been hurt. There have been a few people on this site and in life who have been quite ignorant to myself and others, but you correct. I will just pray that God help them through what ever they are going through/gone through that makes them respond that way. I know the places I have been in my life and what God has done for me, so I pray for the same blessings of realization for them and that they become the person God wants them to be. I pray that for myself as well, so that prayer is not meant in a sarcastic tone. Thank you for your wise words!

I'm not sure how I'm being hypocritical. I'm referring to comments such as "You are stupid," "You are uneducated," "you are going to hell." "Your selfish and a heathen." I could go on, but why? Perhaps I am mis-interpreting such comments. Maybe they meant it in a good way? If my perception of the comments are not correct, then I have in fact been inadvertently been a hypocrite. Please take a gander at some of the comments and some posts. I do not need to tell you where to look. I'm sure you can go to any post and find someone tossing out mean spirited garbage. If you still feel that I am mis-judging/interpeting what is being said, then let me know. I would rather have an understanding of what you mean, instead of getting an insulting message from Darth Vader.

Related, but a bit long winded.

I can't go out much for physical reasons, so my social life is mostly online.

Online = forums.

This is one, but I'm also on other kinds too. I write, so one of the other-kinds is writing sites. Most of the people there keep to topic -- writing -- but personalities come out too. As does IRL stuff.

I'm trying to get a novel I wrote published traditionally, and to do that I have to query agents. A query is something like a cover letter for a resume, except it's for our manuscript. It has a certain style and purpose, but it sure ain't fiction writing, so I've been struggling with mine. And desperately trying to get help from other writers with it.

Someone told me about a site that can help me. Funny. I had joined it years before, but to find the agents I want to represent my story, not to write.

So the idea is to help others with their queries, why others help me with mine. And, if you liked the help received, give them a rep. (Same kind of forum set up as here.) Seemed obvious to me. I thought that's what it was.

It's two months later, and the others have had me change the query 180 degrees. Lots of explaining needed, since a query explains a book in less than 300 words, so what they thought the book was about wasn't usually it. And once I turned it 180 degrees, I posted it, and got more crits telling me to change it more. Once you hit circling 180 degrees the only way you go after that is to circle back to what it was. Confusion!

And then someone told me there was no goal to the story. When I reminded her of the goal, she then said nothing happened. I copy/pasted the part of the query that showed what happened and gave a shrug as a sign that I didn't get what she meant. Something like this:


Another person got huffy because I did that and complained about the "used-scotch tape in the trash can." Do you understand what that means? Neither did I, since there is nothing in my book about used scotch tape or trash cans. So, I told him I didn't get what he was saying.

I was really upset two days ago over all of this. To the point of crying. It felt like I put in all this effort, (and I was critting other queries too), and I couldn't write a query if my life depended on it. I started writing this book in 2011, so all that time wasted because I couldn't write the query to land an agent to sell this book.

The next day, while reading my devotional, it hit me. I was used to people being on topical forums to talk about whatever the topic was. I had stumbled into a forum where many people were there to do just that, but just as many people were there to impart their superior wisdom about there special brand of topic, (used scotch tape, instead of writing, or how the world ends, instead of God), and I didn't know who was who.

I had fallen into the writing world's version of BDF, and thought I was still in the world of writing.

Worse yet! WE, (not "the problem with Christians," because WE are Christians, not some other unknown group we want to disassociate from), WE do that all the time to others.

We really need to stop thinking this is someone else's problem! This is OUR problem. This is what we do to new people, old people, and non-Christian people.

I joined that site to talk about writing. Not the same reason many joined that site. I joined this site to talk about God, and yet, most of it isn't about God. It's about how we see other people, how we play games, and how we are superior in thought and/or action.

Ain't that the same self-centeredness we jumped out of when God saved us? How easily we forget. And how much easier it is to blame all others.

(Preaching. But preaching to me too.)

Your placing of quotation marks around the word "Christians"
signifies your "judgment" of them as not truly redeemed souls,
which is a Judgment to be made by Christ alone.
Not only hypocritical, but sadly ironic.
I don't expect you to "get it".

Depleted: A writer's forum version of BDF? Like, where everybody posts his own writing, thinks it is infinitely superior to everybody else's writing and freely denigrates everybody else's writing by comparing it to his own writing and judging it inferior (solely because other people's writing is not exactly like his own?)

Sounds like a writer's nightmare.

So did you ever find any GOOD advice there? Or do you still need a proofreader for the query letter? I could look it over and tell you the impression I got of the book you are describing, then you could tell me if the impression I got was accurate relative to the book.

Lynx,

we pray that not 'everyone' thinks that there opinions are superior to everyone else's
and hopefully not 'comparing' theirs to everyone else's - this, to us would be a terrible thing
to think about our brothers and sister, you know, the real ones...