IT'S HARD TO SAY GOODBY

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JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#1
July 24th 2014
I am just heart broken right now as I had to put Melisa's, (my daughter's), cat Baby to sleep at the vets around 10:00 am today. He was the best cat I had for minding. I could take him outside and tell him to go back in and he would do so just like a dog... maybe with a little lip and objection but he would go inside. I hate the idea of no living thing walking around the house and really being all alone now.

I will miss him following me all around and wanting his special snacks. He had been sick for awhile and I spent a load of money trying to find out what was wrong with him and it hurts not knowing what made him so sick. The vet could not figure out what was wrong.

He did not eat very much at all yesterday and hid which is not normal for him. He wanted to eat so bad today but just couldn't - that was it for me - I don't want any animal to suffer and yet I feel like a murderer at the same time...

It rained when I came out of the vets - I think God was crying with me. How is it that the four legged furies wrap themselves around our hearts and move in.... I will so miss that little white cat.
 
L

lav

Guest
#2
i feel for you. so sorry to hear your special companion has passed.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#3
i feel for you. so sorry to hear your special companion has passed.
Thank you for your kind words. I know some people don't understand how you can get so upset when an animal passes, but animals love so unconditionally - they don't care what you look like or have any expectations other than please feed me and love me. I am just going to miss my shadow following me around and getting into my business. I unpacked a box of lace that came from ebay last night and he was in the middle of it so content....
 
L

lav

Guest
#4
i know what you mean, i don't judge you at all for your deep grief. we adore our animals, and it hits me really hard when i have to go through losing one or even having just the thought that they won't always be around.

one time my dog got lost at the airport when my mom and grandmother were there... they called me at work and i just broke down and it was like my heart just dropped out of my chest. i was a massage therapist and had an appointment with a client. i asked him if i could please cancel, to go look for my dog... that i was really sorry but that i was very concerned. he said no :( i went though with the massage and bolted for the door with my keys, trying to hurry as quickly as possible. i drove my car to the airport and all around it calling out " STAR ! " for as long as i could. needless to say i was devastated. she is a black/lab retriever mix and is the sweetest most loyal and intelligent dog i have ever known. we are like best buddies. thank God we found out several days later that i woman had found her and was looking for the owner ! we got her back ((((warmth)))) in my heart. God saved the day !

she is getting quite a bit older right now and has many benign bumps all over her body. she also recently developed masticatory mysositis ( it's when a dog loses musculature on one or both sides of the skull and as a result there is a sunken in look to it ) on one side of her head. it's not as bad as it could be, but it happened basically overnight and was a surprise. every time i pet her and hold her ears and hug her... or she lies down on her side to rest on my arm, i value every moment. she still prances around like a little puppy and acts very healthy for her age... the sad part, is that i know she will pass at some point. i'm sorry for going on and on, but i'm just relating to how important animals are for so many.

i can't imagine life without her. i will be ' losing ' a best friend, that is, unless i get to see her in heaven.

we lost jasmine, a really funny and cute cat we had for many years, two years ago. i wept and wept, and still miss her.

it's so hard to lose the ones we love. there really are not words.

another cat we had, onyx, was very old in years when she started to get very weak of natural causes as well. we had her in the bathroom ( as strange as that sounds ) in a small compartment with a cozy blanket and food and water nearby. i would sit in the bathtub and do my homework there, to keep her company ( it was for her and also so *i* could be around her for my own comfort. ) maybe a week to two weeks later, when i was in math class, i got a ring from the principals office that my cat had passed and they let me go home with a friend or two and one of their parent's to give her a proper burial. she was a black siamese with five toes on her front paws. we used to snuggle and lie out in the sun together... i had had her around since i was born.

another dog we had, sadie... was hit by a car when we were walking her. i was about 5 or 6. i was devastated. i saw it happen right in front of my eyes, and there was nothing we could do. she was in a lot of pain ( sorry, such a sad story ) and had to be put to sleep. a neighbor offered me cookies and the thought of eating was sickening to me. i didn't like being babied. at that moment i felt i had grown up as i watched losing a beloved family member, let alone any living thing, pass.. for the first time.

i don't know if any of this even helps, i certainly hope it doesn't irritate or make you feel worse, i just wanted to say i know how it feels and that i don't think it's silly at all to feel a huge hole in your heart. take all the time you need and feel the emotions as they come, may God comfort you and give you an abundance of peace and strength at this time.

it is terribly difficult to lose the ones we love in this life. my grandmother is 95 and it kills me to know she won't be around forever. she has meant the moon and the stars and more. God is at the top, but the sweet ones we connect with are also more important than words communicate. true love is the best thing we feel, have peace that you and your dear friend have an everlasting bond.
 
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lav

Guest
#5
oops, i mean onyx had six toes on each of her front paws :) usually it's five.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#6
Thanks again lav you really have helped to comfort me. Baby was such a good cat we had him for 11 years and the last couple of months he just got so cuddly he never was a lap cat but he even got on me a couple of times. I think he knew the end was near and just wanted to be loved and I tried to give him all the love I could since I knew his time was limited. I just wanted more time - but he had a good spoiled life and I would do it all over even knowing the outcome.

I look forward to the new earth where there will be death no more and we will walk and talk with God and many animals will be friendly and loving that we can't even get close to on this earth. If former animals from earth would be in heaven I surely would wish Baby there. He was very special.
 

gb9

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2011
11,641
6,276
113
#7
so sorry to hear about your pet. I have an older cat ( 13-14 years) and she is fine, but I know the day is coming at some point.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#8
Baby cat I missed you this morning as I was getting ready to go to church. I missed you staring at me and waiting for me to get out of the shower so you could get a drink. I don't know what you loved about dirty shower water, but I missed watching you with your regular routine drink. I miss you following me around the house and you trying to talk to me to tell me that you want your morning snack. I miss the way you crossed your front paws when you laid down with your head up so regal like you owned the place. You just let me live with you didn't you and of course you let me pay the mortgage - how kind of you.

The lizards outside on the courtyard miss being chased and wonder where you went. The tormenting squirrel that runs across the porch screen seems to move a little slower wondering why he is not being chased away. He misses the cardio you gave him as you let him know it was your porch how dare he come on your turf.

The silence in the house is deafening but I'm glad you are not having to deal with being sick anymore. I just miss you little cat so much. Thank you God for the gift of that little white fur ball....Help me to let go of him.....
 
K

Karraster

Guest
#9
Hi Jesuslives, I'm thinking of you this morning and share your grief. We never forget our little companions that God blessed us with, and learn to live without them, but my experience has been that, in time the heartache diminishes while the beautiful memories remain strong. Even after decades we can, out of the blue, get a laugh out loud memory that warms our soul like a warm blanket in the dead of Winter. How gracious is this Creator of ours, that He would see to every detail of our lives, and give us so many creatures to care for and love. May you be comforted, may you always remember that little glimpse of God's handiwork that manifested to you in the form of a small furry personality.
 
F

FireHeart

Guest
#10
July 24th 2014
I am just heart broken right now as I had to put Melisa's, (my daughter's), cat Baby to sleep at the vets around 10:00 am today. He was the best cat I had for minding. I could take him outside and tell him to go back in and he would do so just like a dog... maybe with a little lip and objection but he would go inside. I hate the idea of no living thing walking around the house and really being all alone now.

I will miss him following me all around and wanting his special snacks. He had been sick for awhile and I spent a load of money trying to find out what was wrong with him and it hurts not knowing what made him so sick. The vet could not figure out what was wrong.

He did not eat very much at all yesterday and hid which is not normal for him. He wanted to eat so bad today but just couldn't - that was it for me - I don't want any animal to suffer and yet I feel like a murderer at the same time...

It rained when I came out of the vets - I think God was crying with me. How is it that the four legged furies wrap themselves around our hearts and move in.... I will so miss that little white cat.
I was tearing up reading this, I have a very soft spot for animals especially cats. i have a cat of my own and i cant bear to think of her going away or being in pain like that,Im certain God put those little angels in our lives so we can be together forever in heaven
 

Toska

Senior Member
Nov 16, 2013
1,857
22
38
#11
My heart goes out to you. So many people do not understand how we can become so attached to our pets but, we do. Mine are a part of the family and yours are, too. They work their way into our hearts and, when they leave us, we feel like there is a huge hole left there. It will take time but, your grief will lessen. You will be able to focus on all of the happy times without crying or feeling sad. You will never forget Baby but, your memories will be happy ones.

Hugs to you, I have felt your pain and pray that it will get easier each day for you.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#12
Thanks to all of you who have posted. I probably should have made this a blog, but I was so upset the other day and just wanted a place to put my feelings and Miscellaneous seemed to be the spot. I decided when I really miss Baby that I will post something here just a way to deal with the loss. I can't cry forever and be sad...no one would ever want to be around me. But I know there are a lot of animal lovers out there and it is so nice of you all to share your thoughts with me - they do help.

Time will help ease the pain of loss, but for right now I am just realizing how much I talked to the cat. I told God I guess I'd be talking to Him because the silence is just deafening... I miss hearing the scratching when Baby was in the cat pan, I could hear him lapping the water from his bowl, hear him jumping up and down on the furniture.

His illness was digestive and he threw up so much that he lost his voice, before that I would talk to him and when I stopped he would meow his reply - then I would say something to him as he listened when I stopped talking again he would meow his reply like we were really having a conversation...it was amusing... After he lost his voice he would still reply in that his mouth would open to meow just no sound would come out... He moved and acted o.k. but just had a weak stomach his whole life. Many vet visits and even an ultrasound and biopsy but never a diagnosis...so frustrating.. But we had a great 11 year 9 month run and finally found a medicine that helped with the vomiting. So thanks for letting me rant and go on about our cat.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#13
A story from Baby -

When I was a kitten I used to steal things to play with and carry them around with me like it was my toy. One day I saw this string and I grabbed it and started to run with it. There was this big scary thing chasing me and I didn't know what it was so I ran faster, my mommy and grandma were laughing at me so hard and I didn't know why they were laughing. How could they be laughing at me with this big scary thing chasing me.

Finally the scary thing got caught on the leg of the coffee table and it pulled the string out of my mouth, whew... I could finally stop running as the chase was over. When I turned around and looked my mommy and grandma were still laughing so hard, but I noticed that my mommy bent over and picked up her jacket off the floor it was then I saw the string dangling from the bottom of her jacket....mental note to self in the future make sure strings are not attached to anything before I run off with it.

The end - Baby
 

Toska

Senior Member
Nov 16, 2013
1,857
22
38
#14
Yes, it is nice to have other people who understand you. Most people think of me as the crazy dog lady. It is not because I have dozens of dogs (only 2) but because of how well I treat them. I am a teacher and it breaks my heart to know that I treat my dogs better than a lot of parents treat their children.

A little over a year ago, we had to say goodbye to our yellow lab. He was the most amazing dog, smarter than some people I know:) I cried and cried for days. Now, though, I am able to remember the good times and talk about him with some happiness. He had been with us almost our entire marriage and losing him broke my heart into a million pieces. But, I know he had the best life that he ever could have had, he was loved and well cared for, and we were there with him until the very end. He was almost 15 years old, that is an amazing age for such a big dog.

You keep telling your stories here if that helps you. I love the one you just posted. I can only imagine how funny that was. Keep remembering the good times and know that Baby had the best life possible with you.

God Bless
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
113
69
Tennessee
#15
A story from Baby -

When I was a kitten I used to steal things to play with and carry them around with me like it was my toy. One day I saw this string and I grabbed it and started to run with it. There was this big scary thing chasing me and I didn't know what it was so I ran faster, my mommy and grandma were laughing at me so hard and I didn't know why they were laughing. How could they be laughing at me with this big scary thing chasing me.

Finally the scary thing got caught on the leg of the coffee table and it pulled the string out of my mouth, whew... I could finally stop running as the chase was over. When I turned around and looked my mommy and grandma were still laughing so hard, but I noticed that my mommy bent over and picked up her jacket off the floor it was then I saw the string dangling from the bottom of her jacket....mental note to self in the future make sure strings are not attached to anything before I run off with it.

The end - Baby
Delightful. No strings attached.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#16
It was a stormy day on a Friday the 13th in December 2002 when Baby became a part of our family, (me and my daughter Melisa).

I was getting ready for work early in the morning and Melisa called to me from her bedroom and said mom come here and see if you hear a cat crying. So I went into her room and listened but did not hear anything so I went back to continue to get ready for work. Again Melisa said mom come here I really think I hear a cat crying so again I went into her bedroom and listened and this time I did hear the cat which sounded distressed.

So outside I went into the down poor of rain in ankle deep water in my yard and went over to the neighbors carport. Knowing my neighbors for several years I knew they were dog people and did not own a cat. I called here kitty, kitty and up jumps this small wet dirty grey, but really white kitten who took one look at me and started to purr. So I picked it up and turned it over and took a look and said to it you couldn't be ugly and a girl you had to be cute and a boy. Had it been a girl cat I would have found it another home, but because it was a boy and I had been wanting a white cat I decided he could stay. At that time we had three other cats, two were mine and one was Melisa's so Baby became her second cat.

Now I know a lot of people associate Friday the 13th as unlucky, but for this kitten it was a really lucky day for him because I was in the process of selling my house and on December 16th 2002 was the closing and we were moving out, so three days before we left the neighborhood God sent us this little white kitten gift. On that Friday the 13th I'd say that Baby was pretty lucky he went from being an abandoned kitten on a busy street who managed to keep from getting hit by a car and finding a home with people to love him.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#17
Yes, it is nice to have other people who understand you. Most people think of me as the crazy dog lady. It is not because I have dozens of dogs (only 2) but because of how well I treat them. I am a teacher and it breaks my heart to know that I treat my dogs better than a lot of parents treat their children.

A little over a year ago, we had to say goodbye to our yellow lab. He was the most amazing dog, smarter than some people I know:) I cried and cried for days. Now, though, I am able to remember the good times and talk about him with some happiness. He had been with us almost our entire marriage and losing him broke my heart into a million pieces. But, I know he had the best life that he ever could have had, he was loved and well cared for, and we were there with him until the very end. He was almost 15 years old, that is an amazing age for such a big dog.

You keep telling your stories here if that helps you. I love the one you just posted. I can only imagine how funny that was. Keep remembering the good times and know that Baby had the best life possible with you.

God Bless

I know and feel your pain, loosing our animals is bitter-sweet so hard to deal with them being gone, but the memories of the love and fun we had with them is so wonderful to remember. I am in process of accepting Baby is gone, so not ready to burst into tears as quickly as a couple of days ago when I didn't want to do what had to be done. I look forward to the heavenly promise of no more death and no more tears.
 
J

JustAnotherUser

Guest
#19
I'm sorry to hear about Baby. Know that you've done everything you could and what ever decision you made was out of love. There's gains and losses, especially and unfortunately when it comes to departing with animals but it is selfless love to not see them in pain anymore. They gave selfless love all of their lives for those who they love, and for some maybe to everyone. I understand that there's guilt when losing a very loved pet as well as anyone you lose. I've experienced that guilt quite often when my dog who lived over fifteen years name Mercy, had to be put to sleep due to a tumor that grew on her face and a fast spreading cancer that started taking its toll on her and making her become very thin along with other unpleasant complications. She was the sweetest thing in the whole world and it meant so much to my family, and she seemed to have even been the glue that stuck us together to begin with. It was heartbreaking with everything that went from there. I could go into a very long story with how it all went, but it might make you feel worse so I don't know... As far as it raining while you were at the clinic, we've experienced a very similar thing on two trips with our dog. It's never easy, at all. She was so loving that I wouldn't have asked for anything more. Had to be put down late August of 2009. You take them for granted and never would even think the possibility of them going through anything that would lead to their death or acknowledge that their death would even come to begin with.

I did eventually find peace that I know was from something greater than myself. I know that Mercy is okay and the pets I currently have I will try to stay strong for when their day comes, however it will happen. Especially since the oldest cat I have is now thirteen and will be fourteen by the end of the year and that worries me sometimes. They know that we love them and there couldn't be any other way than to lessen the pain that would have resulted so much differently otherwise, and it requires strength. Also know that there's nothing wrong when grieving, too. It took me a long while to find that closure and just before when first seeing this topic, I shed a tear or two when I thought of Mercy.

Also know that if you feel like you can't take not having a cat around after Baby's passing, maybe you should try and adopt a new cat or kitten. It's not really a replacement, but it can fill the void and make you go through the grieving process a bit better. It's not for everyone and certainly wasn't mine to accept that we may get another dog someday, but it's just a suggestion. You could give that same love and home for that future cat if you do.

What also reminds and somewhat helps me is when I saw this and it goes for any type of pet, for the most part:




I may have helped somewhat, maybe not, I could've made it worse... But my condolences are with you and I hope this grief will pass for you soon. An animal *lover (LOL, forgot to put lover after that, but I could be one heck of an animal too) saying this to another animal lover even if it's only specific types of pets, I understand completely just like others here and won't judge.
 
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JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,551
2,171
113
#20
I'm sorry to hear about Baby. Know that you've done everything you could and what ever decision you made was out of love. There's gains and losses, especially and unfortunately when it comes to departing with animals but it is selfless love to not see them in pain anymore. They gave selfless love all of their lives for those who they love, and for some maybe to everyone. I understand that there's guilt when losing a very loved pet as well as anyone you lose. I've experienced that guilt quite often when my dog who lived over fifteen years name Mercy, had to be put to sleep due to a tumor that grew on her face and a fast spreading cancer that started taking its toll on her and making her become very thin along with other unpleasant complications. She was the sweetest thing in the whole world and it meant so much to my family, and she seemed to have even been the glue that stuck us together to begin with. It was heartbreaking with everything that went from there. I could go into a very long story with how it all went, but it might make you feel worse so I don't know... As far as it raining while you were at the clinic, we've experienced a very similar thing on two trips with our dog. It's never easy, at all. She was so loving that I wouldn't have asked for anything more. Had to be put down late August of 2009. You take them for granted and never would even think the possibility of them going through anything that would lead to their death or acknowledge that their death would even come to begin with.

I did eventually find peace that I know was from something greater than myself. I know that Mercy is okay and the pets I currently have I will try to stay strong for when their day comes, however it will happen. Especially since the oldest cat I have is now thirteen and will be fourteen by the end of the year and that worries me sometimes. They know that we love them and there couldn't be any other way than to lessen the pain that would have resulted so much differently otherwise, and it requires strength. Also know that there's nothing wrong when grieving, too. It took me a long while to find that closure and just before when first seeing this topic, I shed a tear or two when I thought of Mercy.

Also know that if you feel like you can't take not having a cat around after Baby's passing, maybe you should try and adopt a new cat or kitten. It's not really a replacement, but it can fill the void and make you go through the grieving process a bit better. It's not for everyone and certainly wasn't mine to accept that we may get another dog someday, but it's just a suggestion. You could give that same love and home for that future cat if you do.

What also reminds and somewhat helps me is when I saw this and it goes for any type of pet, for the most part:




I may have helped somewhat, maybe not, I could've made it worse... But my condolences are with you and I hope this grief will pass for you soon. An animal *lover (LOL, forgot to put lover after that, but I could be one heck of an animal too) saying this to another animal lover even if it's only specific types of pets, I understand completely just like others here and won't judge.

Thank you I know you understand and I understand about loosing pets - Baby is not my first to have to put down me being 59 there have been several lovable pets that I have had to put out of suffering. I love and miss them all. Baby is just the most recent and he was oh so special because how many cats do you know that mind like a dog? There are not many of those. Sorry you had to do the same with Mercy, but I'm glad Mercy was in your life as I am thankful for the gift from God that Baby was for us.