Throw away fear, throw away doubt, all of it, and with all of your heart and mind, spend some time just sitting and talk to Him.
Are you ready to trust 100%? It's sooo hard to, I don't even trust 100% yet, which is why I doubt. Go look at the Bible, there are those that trusted G-d with all their heart and mind, if He took something away, or put them in an awful place they look to Him and trust that He knows what he is doing. Then there are those who believe in G-d until they are in a bad spot. Until He asks them to do something difficult.
There is a difference between being a Christian and having a true relationship with God.
Having a true relationship with G-d is taking the leap, saying, I am the most dependent person I know, alone I can do nothing, but through You I can do all things. Or G-d, I haven't been able to feel your presence for a while now, you have sent no sign, but I trust fully that you are there for me and you are waiting for the perfect time, you will save and rescue me from any trial this world gives.
The reason I say you can't take baby steps to that spot, is because until you have a true relationship with G-d doubt will come, and you won't have the faith the work through it.
Trials will come, and all you will see is His absence isn't of His waiting to save you.
He will ask you to do something, and like Jonnah, you will doubt Him and go the other way.
This world hardwires us to think we have to rely on ourselves (and I'm not saying go be stupid and jump in front of a train thinking G-d will save you) but we can't rely on ourselves. That's not how this works. Through abuse, through poverty, through plenty, and whatever you have or are going through we have to rely 100% on G-d to get us through abuse unscathed in Him, to provide us with food, to provide us with full faith even if we have much.
That is what taking a leap looks like.