Porn & Masturbation

Hey guys.
How's it going?
Hope you all have a great summer so far.

Guys, I have a problem and need some suggestions/advice from you guys.

I am a Christian who is currently still struggling with porn & masturbation addiction.
though I've made some improvement.
I was doing it every 2 days last year, now, i do it every a week or so.
But still, this is NOT right. (I don't want to be easily satisfied and stuck in this level. I want to be completely free because I believe that God IS able to do that.)
And I really want to stop this.

I've seen the effects of having this bad habit: low self-esteem, not confident in yourself, bad relationship w others, lazy, like to take shortcut, taking things for granted, less spend time w friends, not productive in life (therefore, less chance being successful in life), etc.

I think this habit is REALLY DESTRUCTIVE. and I believe that if a person set free from this bad habit, he or she would be way more productive and confident doing things in life and thus have GREATER chance of being successful in life.

In my personal life, I have wasted so many years just because of this bad habit. I feel that I could have used those wasted years for something more productive. and I believe if I would've done that, I believe I would've been more successful by now. Therefore, once again, I really need to destroy this bad habit.


So, I was wondering if you guys have any suggestion or advice that I can use to stop this bad habit?

So far I've found two things really helpful:
1. Asking help from God (Meditating Word of God)
2. Taking your responsibility (Disciplining your mind, for ex: put your Laptop outside)

Do you guys have anything else to add (or some insights)? I would really appreciate it! Thank you so much!


P.S. (here I want to explain just in case there are people out there who are struggling with this bad habit and looking for help. Hopefully can be helpful to you. Never give up! God is able! )

(These two related because in order for me to discipline my mind, I have to meditate on good things (things that are above/WOG). I have also read books about mind from Joyce Meyer. It's been really helpful to me.
And that's why I love Joyce. I believe God has used her mightily to help people through her personal life, including me. For those of you guys who are also struggle with this habit I HIGHLY recommend you to read or listen to Joyce's books/sermons.
I also think disciplining your mind (taking responsibilities for yourself) is really helpful, because you can't just wish to change and just sit there and wishing God to help you while you're doing nothing. (this is from Joyce's teaching). So, in this case, I started to put my laptop outside, and THAT's when my life began to change gradually.)

Well, you got the first step right... ASKING GOD FOR HELP!!! He is the way the truth and the life. All things are possible through Christ who strengthens us. Since this is an addiction, you should realize how it is taking over your life. It is wrong and when we continue to knowingly choose to sin, we seperate ourselves from God. When we give in to any temptation we become a slave to it... and who is the mastermind behind all sin? SATAN!! Who will you choose to be a slave to? Satan or Our GOD Almighty? We know that it is in our best interest to continue to grower closer to GOD. Don't let this addiction stand between you and your relationship with GOD. Remember GOD LOVES YOU!! and you are forgiven for all your sins. But we must DIE to our sins and let JESUS be the lordship of our life. Our body is the temple in which Jesus lives. Be filled with the Holy Spirit. and let all your actions be driven by Christ.

i broke my short porn addiction easily, but my masturbation habit has clung to me unendingly, i get off for a few weeks then it hits again. Im in the same boat, trying to bail out water before i sink too deep and its not easy.

This isnt really a habit as much as an addiction. One becomes a slave to something...and just like smoking, you're hooked! I think you're right to asGk God to release you from that sort of thing.

my advice is to pray.
just remember how serious sin is and that we should do anything to stop sinning even if it is canceling the intenet plan or selling your computer and only using the library's

and welcome to christian chat

Taken captive of your thoughts. The moment the idea enters your head, try not to entertain the thoughts. Many if these idea's may work. But also understand, we do it cause we like doing it. It is a selfish pleasure.

I commend you, Brother for speaking out on this. I've find, the longer you withstand the desire to masturbation, the more straight our Lord gives. It is not my will to stop, but God's will that grows in me. All these things might just sound bible cliches. But it is truth that we come to believe. We must apply these truths and we should continue to speak out openly. Not many share this openly and when we do, most like to say, they have over come this desire. This is a long process for some. But the fact you see it as a problem, shows your looking to please God.

I work with the mentally challenged, and one of my clients just tried committing suicide due to his shame for masturbation. He now feels he's a pervert and everyone around him knows and feels the same. I've told him, if he's a pervert then i'm a pervert and that he's not alone in this.

I don't see this battle being fought alone. As we continue to hind it from others, we then believe we're hiding from God. And we all know that we hide nothing from God.

It won't kill u if u go as far as selling ur laptop..lol.... Just saying

as the woman I want to say if you burn .. Marry!!! i Think that is the best Biblical advice ever! I personally burn so i know what you are dealing with... it's hard God created us as sexual beings. no one wants to say that though... sexual beings in the context of marriage let me clarify or people will get all up in a tizzy.. anyways.. This struggle happens to a lot of people we have to put the full armor of God on and resist temptation .. (flee the devil) when the urge hits us! Just rely on the Holy SPirit for your self control.

I had this very issue. To me, I had been dating for the reason/hope of getting sex. I ended up in relationships that were terrible with girls I didn't even care about just for sex. I came to the decision that if I stay single, use porn, and masterbate, that I didn't have to settle or get into a miserable relationship. A few years of this, and I met a girl I clicked with, we got together, and started having sex. We broke up, and I (over the course of a couple of weeks) came back to God. I was about to masterbate again, but it didn't feel right. I'm not sure it ever did. It made sense because if I masterbated, I wouldn't have sex, get an STD, or get some girl pregnant with kids I don't want, right? Seemed the only way. I prayed. Then, what the Bible says about Paul praying for God to take away that "thorn in his flesh" made alot of sense. Think about it this way: cast your cares on God. Truely give it up to Him. That means letting go of it in your own heart, and letting Him work it out. I haven't really even wanted to in weeks. I'm not talking about self-sacrifice here, I'm talking about relying on God, and letting the issue go to Him in your heart. Rely on God, that is the answer to combatting porn-addiction, lust, and masterbation.

Is it really a sin to masturbate. You're not cheating on anyone and you're not looking at porn. You just masturbate. Why is that a sin? Please give scripture.

If masturbation includes sexually immoral thoughts, then yes it is a sin. If mastubation includes lust and immoral thoughts then it is a sin. The bible says that if you lust with immoral thoughts about someone other than your spouse, then you have committed adultery in your heart.

Matthew 5:28

Now if you are married... and your thoughts are innocently of your spouse... Then my thought is through masturbation you may be hindering your sexual intimacy with your spouse. By masturbating you may not desire to have sex with your spouse as much, denying them of that physical intimacy that God inteneded for husband and wife. Also, mastubation one may see masturbation as an alternate choice to having sex and if so... I disagree that masturbation is a anywhere close to an alternate choice and will never measure up to the intimate closeness that God intends us to experience with our spouse.

As for the unmarried..... I assume during mastubation, one may have a visual thought or even view images of another person. This goes back to Matthew 5:28- "...anyone who even looks at a womanwith lust in his eyehas already committed adultery with her in his heart." NLT

Thanks for the info. What if spouse is holding out on you and you are only thinking of spouse when you do this?

Actually, porn addiction is not always a 'burn' that can be resolve through marriage. Porn addiction usually goes deeper than than the physical and if it is not properly dealt with all you will be doing is taking a porn addict and putting them into a marriage situation.
It may band aid the addiction for some time, but soon as there is a problem within the marriage, the sex and intimacy goes away for a few days til bigger issues get resolved, then that porn addiction will surface.
Its a genuine addiction, and just like other addictions (alcohol, drugs, etc) it needs help to overcome it and simple sounding solutions like 'just get married' will do nothing to end it.


To the OP... usually there is an area in your life lacking. While all this praying and reading advice is nice, what you Really need to do is step back and totally re-evaluate exactly where your walk is, exactly how important God really is to you. As Christians its easy to say 'well of course God's important to me' without putting any thought into it. I suggest you look hard and deep. Look past the christian-isms... the christian-ese... the christian cliches and happy thoughts and strip away your spiritual pride to discover if your heart is really where you try to convince yourself it is. That is one of the first and most important steps.

Great advise!

Hmmmm. That's a tough one. Have you talked to your spouse to see where the lack of intimacy is? Because sex is an important factor in a healthy marriage. Not just for the physical pleasure. but for the closeness and connectiveness. Also, consider how long this has been going on.
Ask yourself:
Has the work schedule been more demanding?
Is there any new or unusual stress in their life?
Besides your sex life, Is everything else going okay with your marriage?
Or are they other underlying probelms?

Stormie Omartian writes a great book of prayers. I have "The Power of a praying wife"- just the little pocket size book of prayers ($6.99) It is great! It has a section on Sexuality and how to pray for your sexuality. Just an example prayer from the book:

Lord, bless my spouse's sexuality and make it an area of great fulfuillment for him. Restore what needs to be restored, balance what needs to be balanced. Protect us from apathy, disappointment, criticicsm, busyness, unforgiveness, deadness, or disinterst....

....show me how to make myself attractive and desirable to my spouse and to be the kind of partner he needs.

Hope this helps!

I have a broken ankle and he hasn't even tried since this. 2 weeks. But, there are other problems as well. I've always been the initiator (sp?) And I have talked with him about it and we have looked at Bible verses together. I tried everything in the past to make myself attractive and desirable. I pray for him continually. He did take out the tv because he couldn't control what he watched. If you can't control it, get it out of your life. So, I applaud him for that. For the longest time though, he's treated me more like a friend than a spouse. I've had problems because of it but he is not the type to talk about problems. He will not discuss it. So, I guess I am getting cold on him, but not on God.

That's great that he was able to see that the TV was a problem and took it out. And I am SO glad to hear that you refuse to give up on GOD because he is the way the truth and the life. Just keep on praying, girl. There is power in prayer. Re-evaluate if there are any areas in your life that you have not fully given to God. Sometimes God uses these kind of things to bring awareness to another area we may need to address. But know that God loves you and he knows the pain you are feeling. It may be that you are experiencing a feeling of rejection in this area of your life. My advice to you is to ask God: Are there any areas that god may feel rejecting by you? Don't jump to an answer right away. Pray and meditate on that for a week or so.

God Bless You!

Thank you.