I am lost without a heart and broken spirit... GOD, please...

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brokenwings

Guest
#1
help me. Forgive me, show me where to go and what to do and how to do it.

God gave me a gift and I destroyed it... I can't stop...
 
I

incorporatestreet

Guest
#2
what happened?
 
B

brokenwings

Guest
#3
I had an abortion... 19 days ago...
 
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brokenwings

Guest
#4
the guilt alone is killing me everyday...
 
I

incorporatestreet

Guest
#5
oh.... my mom was forced to have an abortion when she was 15...
she wanted to keep the child.. it was so hard for her...
i think like 7 years ago, god showed my mom the baby...
it was a girl.. god really helped her and healed her.
it is so very hard, but know that your child is in Gods arms.
he is protecting you and holding your heart.
he is also protecting your baby.
 
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brokenwings

Guest
#6
but i wasn't forced... I made the terrible choice. I'm not doing well, do you know if this site has someone I can talk to to?
 
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incorporatestreet

Guest
#7
im not too sure...
ill keep you in my prayers..

things will get better..
just trust in god.
 
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N-Lily

Guest
#8
help me. Forgive me, show me where to go and what to do and how to do it.

God gave me a gift and I destroyed it... I can't stop...


What is the gift? Why you are in stress of that?
 
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brokenwings

Guest
#9
I aborted my baby
 
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iservechrist24

Guest
#10
well your suffering, and part of true repentance in what you did is suffering. Im sorry that you made that choice, and I can clearly see that you are sorry as well. But know that God loves you.

It says in the bible in Romans 8:38-39 - "For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor heavenly rulers, nor things that are present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord"

We can read in that scirpture(s) that theres nothing that you can do to separate yourself from the Love of God. He Loves you soooo much, so much so that He allowed Himself to come to earth and die for our sins. And lemme tell ya, none of us are perfect.

But you see the mistake you made, your sorry, and i beleive you have repented. So all you have to do from here on out is move on. Tell satan to get behind you, and leave it in the past where it belongs. Today is a brand new day, start it by worshiping and thanking God.

I hope this helps, God Bless you today!

in Christ,
Matt
 
M

Markus

Guest
#11
I totally agree with iservechrist24. If you have true repentance and ask God for forgiveness (which I assume you have done) then, there's no doubt in my mind that God already forgave you! You still feel guilty, but the true guilt is already gone. Jesus already paid for that 2000 years ago! Satan hates that and all he tries to do is convince you that God did not forgive you. That you're not welcome anymore, that what you did is just too bad and can't be forgiven. Well that's a dirty lie! There's no sin so big that God can't forgive! He is sooo awesome, you know! :)
Also, I think I know a tiny little bit how you must feel. I did something terrible lately and I really hate myself for it. I still feel so bad about it, and sometimes I think that God doesn't want me anymore... But I know that is not true! It helps me to think about all those people in the bible who did terrilble things, and to see how forgiving God was in those cases. My favorite example is king David.

I hope that someone here knows someone for you to talk to. In Holland we have a christian organization that helps women in situations like yours. Maybe there's something like that in the USA too.

God bless!
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,940
4,580
113
#12
Broken: As an adopted child myself, I can empathize with the pain you're feeling. I was found in a cardboard box on the street in front of a theater in Seoul, Korea, but was found and eventually taken to an orphanage (and came home to a wonderful Christian family when I was six months old.) It's much different in Korea than here--there are no resources for single mothers--and I am most likely of mixed racial origin, which is an even worse shame in that culture. I don't know what the abortion statistics or resources are like there (and no, I'm not defending abortion, but I do empathize greatly with women who make that choice because I see my own mother in them) but I have often wondered if my birth mother had thoughts of somehow trying to end her pregnancy with me or if she tried to harm herself hoping that she would lose me. Of course, it breaks my heart... but I have also told God a hundred times to please let her know, if she's still alive and wherever or whoever she is, that I forgive anything she may have done in anger or frustration, sadness or loneliness... and that I still love her. And if she would have made the choice to end my life before I left the womb, if God would have been gracious enough to allow me to go to heaven, I'm sure I would still have asked the same thing--to please let her know I forgive her and still love her (and that God forgives her of any wrongdoing as well.) In fact, I've had to ask for forgiveness myself many times for my own anger and sadness at being abandoned. But I know God took a bad situation and made something out of it that is according to His plan... It's taken a lot of time and growth to get to this point, but I know God will forgive you--please take heart in His love and the fact that He will never reject your repentant, seeking heart. You'll be in my prayers... God bless.
 
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collective

Guest
#13
im so sorry about your loss, nobody deserves to go through the terrible pain and the guilt you are going through, if only at the time we knew what we were doing because the circumstance does not compare with the pain after losing a child of our own doing in pregnancy, its a terrible dark place to be in,I say this because I had an abortion back in 1995 when i was about 20, Sister you will be ok, give it some time, let the pain of this darkness take its coiurse, keep up with your relationship with God, and the concequenses will be light, some people turn promiscuous after an abortion, after the pains, I know I did,Hes there, God knew you and I would do this before he created us, so God Is Not Taken By Surprise, once you finally learn this valuable lesson, and youl come to find comfort further down the track that you will meet you child as he/she waits for you in heaven, i always think of David and Bathshebas baby born in adultery,that died whom David will see in heaven, and hes up there now with his child Praise God? I hope you will take comfort in that time to come and the scripture in Revelations that.. God shall wipe their tears out of their eyes,darling in the mean time get support like a post-abortion counsellor and or a pastor or someone who will not judge you because you will be harshly judging yourself for a while, also if you can, the father of your child needs to share the pain and greive with you with you so you are not alone in this, I hope hes there for you, also I know that God seems sooooooo far away and that you feel that he is mad at you, this part of the condemnation which is opened up by the act given place to the devil, when you are tired of trying to find God tell him this and ask him to find you, and most important, YOU MUST LEARN TO FORGIVE YOURSELF!!!! and oneday you will be a powerhouse and your ministry to share and encourage with others not to have abortions if they are contemplateing it or share their pain, and thats how the work of God carries on in this fallen world.But in the mean time first things first, may God have your broken heart in His hands with love Julia
 
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christopher_redbird

Guest
#14
Hi, brokenwings

I prayed for god to touch you heart and heal it as soon I read your post last night. Just ask him for the same and he will. It will not be quick and easy though, be patient and keep asking.

If you want someone to talk to, I will be happy to. I recently went through what I thought was an unbearable heartache. I am still working through it through prayer. I have one good Christian friend who helped me a lot by listening. I would like to do the same for you, email me if you wish.

Christopher

[email protected]