Embarrassing Situation but It's Reality!

I'm still a little girl at heart, and I had to jump on this thread to maybe see my name in "sparkles" - how creative you are Roxxy!

Lord,
I pray that you will invade this marriage and remove the idol of pornography from this husband's heart. Only you can show him the truth and turn his heart only towards his wife for sexual gratification. May he be shown that you will accept him just the way that he is, embrace him with love that will completely satisfy him, and that he be inspired to give his life completely to you.

Help Roxxy to have the wisdom and love to take the right actions. Strengthen her in the patience she needs to keep trusting that she is not alone in this desire to set her husband free. This is also your will.

By faith, we see you moving in power to establish this family as a godly one. One in which you are glorified.
In Jesus' Name.
Amen.

Will Pray, been getting rid of my addiction as well, God had to remove my heart for me to realize what I was really doing, was in serious pain few months ago and it wasn't physical, I went to the emergency and was fine, but I wasn't spiritually, I kinda feel my Heart slowly returning.

Yes, sir!

No wonder the Lord Jesus called a lot of "men" adulterers (Mar 8:38 For whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of man also shall be ashamed of him, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels. ) and, in the OT, God gave a man a chance to see what was happening inside His temple´s wall:

"Eze 8:14 Then he took me to the door of the way into the Lord's house looking to the north; and there women were seated weeping for Tammuz.
Eze 8:15 Then he said to me, Have you seen this, O son of man? you will see even more disgusting things than these. "

(I bet you know what this means, here) Ladies also have their problems... (Joh 4:17 In answer, the woman said, I have no husband. Jesus said to her, You have said rightly, I have no husband:
Joh 4:18 You have had five husbands, and the man you have now is not your husband: that was truly said. )



Yet, many ppl have their right to see themselves just and justified, like this man: "Luk 18:11 The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as the rest of men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican.

I chose to see me as sinner as I am.

They are recorded on PVR, which means he cannot re-record them once I erase then since we no longer have those channels. PVR (personal video recorder) which is an interactive TV recording device. You record from the tv itself. We don't have those channels anymore so once they are wiped out, they are gone.

Thank you and big hugs

Thank you Father for giving her husband a clean and pure heart, in Jesus name!!!

Yet, the Bible said, "as some of you.... WERE." It is Satan's trick that we fall into with things like the 12 step program where we actually identify with the addiction, that keeps us powerless. There is a power far greater than feeling we ARE something because we DO an act. (Read the last sentence of my signature to begin to understand the power of realizing our true identity.)

I know this is a bit off topic, but I'm interested to know more about this 12-step thing?

Just realized that God uses a similar notion by casting the evil spirits out...
It's like God says: "this is not of Me, and it's not of you either! It just lived inside for a very long time so you think it is a part of you."
Illness is not you.
Addiction is not you.
Sin is not you.
Wow! Powerful stuff.
This demon does not have part with or in roxyroller's husband. Jesus, You are sovereign! We plead, Jesus reclaim YOUR territory and cast this spirit into the pit to await judgment! Our sister roxyroller is Your child, and she is one body with this man according to Your Word, being married to him, let her prevail, let Christ in her prevail as her new spirit was born of GOD. Lord, draw this man with Your love like you did all of us when none of us deserved it. Let this man also praise you and love you, Jesus. We ask You to send Your holy angels to battle on roxyroller's behalf and believe it shall be done for the sake of JESUS. HALLELUYAH and amen \^-^/

The first thing you are required to do in most any 12 step program ( alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, whatever... there are many of these same programs)is to "embrace the problem, admit you are powerless over it, and actually begin saying out loud, that you are a _____ addict. When you introduce yourself in group, you are required to say, "Hello, I am John, and I am a ____________ ." The scary word, and thought here, to me, is that you are saying you ARE the problem, not that you HAVE a problem. This is 100% AGAINST God's view of us, and the way He wants us to see ourselves. (Again, see the last line of my signature......... Many people I know have used this very scripture in our own lives to beat addictions and behavior.

I believe that your husband has a self-inflicted disease. Don't ever try to please your husband at the expense of your own self-worth and dignity, especially if it conflicts with your spiritual nature inside of your heart. Your husband will never stop watching porn on his own, only if he accepts God's help will this be possible. At this point all you can do is to tell him that his attitude is degrading to you and is offensive to God. I have said a prayer for God to deliver you from this terrible affliction of his. I am not sure what form this deliverance will take but it will indeed happen.

I have a brother in law with a pornography issue. Although, my sister knew about it before they married and doesn't really see a problem with it, which is beyond me. I would have a BIG problem with it. If I were you I would sit down and have a heart to heart with your husband about it and that since you gave your life to the Lord it makes you uncomfortable having that in the home. Does he happen to attend church with you? I would start the conversation off by asking him if he loves you and would do anything for you. Then tell him about it making you feel uncomfortable. In all honesty a lot of men want to get out of the addiction, but doesn't know how. I would approach him in love. I will be praying for you.

I have a question for those who have some knowledge about this addiction. Would it be better for Roxxy to erase those behind her husband's back or would it be better for her to tell him she wants him to get into a group or counseling and he must erase them? Something doesn't sit right with me when I read she will do it. Maybe that is proper, but it seems like he should be doing that.

I think she should tell him he needs counseling, and SHE should erase the tapes cuz you know darn well HE won't want to do it..

Totally agree that he won't want to. Just wondering if it would feel more like he is dedicated to changing himself, if he did it, and what that means for his healing and correction. I'm not saying she should put up with it. And, I don't know if I am correct or not. That's why I asked if other's here who have gone through it have any insight.

I have a question, roxyroller, why did you used to think porn was ok? How far did this go? Affairs ok, one night stands, sharing partners etc. This world of porn is more than just acting out fantasy, but a whole philosphy of if it feels right do it.

The problem with suddenly seeing it for what it is, your partner does not understand, or even yourself really understood what it meant to you, and what it means to them.

I have known christians who see porn as merely a spicing up of a relationship, and others of there are no boundaries, we are free. There is an argument around trying to define what is legitimate sharing between a couple, and what is sin, but porn is encouraging sexual abuse of individuals for money, outside of marriage or respect for those involved or even of themselves.

Many ex-porn stars confess how difficult and demeaning and suicidal they have become, which springs from the abuse of something very intimate and fundamental to our very beings and how we express love.

Men and women also react differently to porn, where men tend to be more disfunctional as see porn as merely a means to an end of sexual gratification. What they do not realise it can become the only gratification they have and it grow to destroy their relationships and love within a marriage or family. But it is a hard road to walk, to begin to face the truth.

I pray you can let the Lord help you learn about yourself and your husband to help him get free from this addiction.
It is a good first step to see porn for what it is, it is harder to find a way through to do something about it...

I to have that problem with and only thing make think is do i love her and how do i show it. to many think because its easier to believe in world we can have and never have be put to a test of if it came to it and i had to only choose one what would that be and that no way around i have to choose one or the other, cant have both, see its the test that God has made love or there would be no love. i hope this helps but have put self to what God has revealed that there is no way around this test we will be put to this test. I used try understand what love what is right and wrongwhat decides where the fine line is to love and no love. it prority only is it what you will only to do is love. yo say well i do thing for my family first so its ok for me to do this as a 3 priority as long as i take care of my family first. no love isnt only proirity. its long here to go into details but i love is like ransom. how much are we willing to pay for have that some one God and each other. People are like this well i gave God you 99% of what i have to show i love you just let me keep this. but test God give is what will we give all up for for those go to heell the all is the family to give them up forever to have there one and true love love . thats why we can no be forgiven after we die the t the test is over those chosen a permant love. like if let say there for example bare with me . let say on aide theres a you family on ther other side is you objects not a being but things of desire and in the middle is a door that is slowly closing and when it reaches fully close you are sepreated from one otr the other forever and never. tbis is the ulimate love test. there is no other test beyouny this love test God has made to put us through. people like to believe that you can have both and it be ok. even i lie to my self to have way to have both. please bare with my typing mistakes it very hard to fix them on my old school android little

Thanks, sir!

Allegations could be many:

"I don´t wnat to loose that part of my life"
"I´m alone"
"I want to be pleased..."

As an adicction, arguments could be as you said ("we actually identify with it") keeping those believer powerless (Yes! God´s the source of it) and, at the end of the day, much of human insatisfaccion lays on lack of trust, communicating God our HUMAN needs (and our spouses) with the needed ackwowledgement of what god´s will is.

Fortunally I have seen people overcoming those problems and, the moment those things are dealt with God, He will show the way (although some persons have learned to live as eunuchs -or consacrated hermits)

You are very correct in this "erasing" scenario. It could actually be a very bad thing for her to take it upon herself to do things he is not yet in agreement with.