My wife left and im trying to her back

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Knightz61

Guest
#1
My wife left me over a month ago. She told me she is talking to another man. We have had a hard marriage but i thought we were happy. We have 3 wonderful kids together. Our youngest had cancer and she is clear of it now but its been a long road. She told me that she hasnt been happy for a while but she never told me during our time together. Our biggest obstacle has been communication. We talk now about everything but she seems to be enchanted by this other guy that he listens to her and is saying all the right things. Im so worried that she is gonna get hurt and get embarressed that she thinks she cant come back. Im trusting God to do what he can to hinder the other guys progress. Ive asked her to do marriage couselling but to no avail. Im giving her time and space but im worried that she is pulling away. Im also worried that our kids are starting to resent her a little. I keep telling them that we love them. I just need prayer for our situation that God will help us reconcile but its up to her. I know God is using the situation to pull me back in and Im loving it. Im trying to have faith that she will come around as well. She is listening to the wrong influences. Her new boss is a life coach and I heard that she had told other women that they may need to divorce to be happy with themselves and it breaks my heart that so many marriages have been broken up because of her influence. Right now our friends that we have together she doesnt even talk too. Its so frustrating that nothing is getting through. Im praying and they are too that someone or something is gonna get through to her. I just want my family back together and its tearing me apart that she is doing this. She told me that i had hurt her over the years and i admit that i probably was the best husband i could have been to her. But she didnt tell me that she wasnt happy so i figured everything was ok. Please pray for us and that God will guide us through it to reconcile so our family is stronger and better. Thank you
 
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SweetmorningDew78

Guest
#2
My wife left me over a month ago. She told me she is talking to another man. We have had a hard marriage but i thought we were happy. We have 3 wonderful kids together. Our youngest had cancer and she is clear of it now but its been a long road. She told me that she hasnt been happy for a while but she never told me during our time together. Our biggest obstacle has been communication. We talk now about everything but she seems to be enchanted by this other guy that he listens to her and is saying all the right things. Im so worried that she is gonna get hurt and get embarressed that she thinks she cant come back. Im trusting God to do what he can to hinder the other guys progress. Ive asked her to do marriage couselling but to no avail. Im giving her time and space but im worried that she is pulling away. Im also worried that our kids are starting to resent her a little. I keep telling them that we love them. I just need prayer for our situation that God will help us reconcile but its up to her. I know God is using the situation to pull me back in and Im loving it. Im trying to have faith that she will come around as well. She is listening to the wrong influences. Her new boss is a life coach and I heard that she had told other women that they may need to divorce to be happy with themselves and it breaks my heart that so many marriages have been broken up because of her influence. Right now our friends that we have together she doesnt even talk too. Its so frustrating that nothing is getting through. Im praying and they are too that someone or something is gonna get through to her. I just want my family back together and its tearing me apart that she is doing this. She told me that i had hurt her over the years and i admit that i probably was the best husband i could have been to her. But she didnt tell me that she wasnt happy so i figured everything was ok. Please pray for us and that God will guide us through it to reconcile so our family is stronger and better. Thank you
Father God, It is in your will that Marriage is for a lifetime and therefore what You have joined together let no man separate!Lord,I pray that you would restore the love between our brother and his wife.Heal any emotional wounds,bitterness and confusion!and Show her again the way back to her family! In JESUS MIGHTY name!Amen!
 
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Infusion

Guest
#3
I usually dont comment on forums much but I had to say something.

I have not been so lucky to have a wife and family, so I have alot of experience dating. I learn things still every day while married guys forget how it is, like the movie 'Hall Pass'. And this reminds me of two main lessons I have learned.

If you had 'game', you would not need a miracle. Having game does not mean lying, it means being the man you are supposed to in the first place, or at least appearing to be playing your role. I bet you beg her for her heart and tell you you are sorry for not being enough, and this just makes it all so much worse. Love does not equate attraction, you are able to love anything. When you are attracted to women its not love that first attracts you and brings you together, that comes after. Most good guys just try to be loving and honest but they way they express it usually turns women away because this just is not the 'game' set up by the creator himself. And yes the game actually is written in the bible. You need to ask single guys that get alot of women and research this all you can. I am just being honest, but most married guys that dont know the game just dont usually have lasting marriages. Its a way of life.

And this situation like all, have everything to do with it....
And the other thing I had to learn and you need to learn to is to love yourself first then love others. If you love others more than yourself then they will not be able to love you. If you love yourself, others will be able to love you and women will be more attracted to you. And without respect there is no love. I think most relationships break up, not cause the woman no longer loves the man, but no longer respects him. You have to respect yourself for her to respect you. And the way she KNOWS she is acting, every minute you dont fix it she will lose more respect for you. If you loved and respected yourself you would have either kicked her out or fixed her for good long ago. I know you want to keep your family together, but think about it, if you really loved yourself more than her, her actions would be disgusting in your eyes and you would not want to be around her.

I hope things work out for you whatever happens. If you dont have the alpha male in you that women want, if you dont have the heart to set her straight yourself, most guys dont, I hope you find the heart to set yourself straight. You dont need anybody and sure dont need that kind of trash. I myself could never be attracted to that kind of women, I avoid them.
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#4
Heavenly Father I thank You for the work that You are doing in this man. You use many situations to pull the lost closer to You. May his eyes be opened to the works of Your hand. Please reach the heart of his bride and remind her of the reasons she fell in love with him and renew her passions for him, because you will be the attractive force in him. Do Your will and mend this home better than it was before. Open his eyes to the brokenness that she clung to for several years hurting until one day she let go. May forgiveness greet her as her children understand that pain drove her to abandon them and not a lack of love. Snuff the lies that she has accepted as truth that happiness is a prize awarded for selfishness. I thank you for the future testimony that this couple will share with other separated couples of how You are One who heard their cries and answered their prayers for oneness in Your Name. In the Name of Yeshua I ask and thank You in complete faith that you will hear and answer this prayer for Your glory.
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#5
Oh yeah, Knightz61, make her feel special! That's really the only thing that everybody wants.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
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Philippines Age 40
#7
The idea to love yourself first before you can love others is not biblical. How can you love others if you are busy being self centered? God said to love others as you love yourself. God commanded this because it is not easy to do. We don't need to be reminded to love ourselves because we already do since we are selfish by nature. Love your wife the best way you can so that her respect for you will grow back. One day at a time. Love conquers all. God bless.
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
1,581
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#8
The idea to love yourself first before you can love others is not biblical. How can you love others if you are busy being self centered? God said to love others as you love yourself. God commanded this because it is not easy to do. We don't need to be reminded to love ourselves because we already do since we are selfish by nature. Love your wife the best way you can so that her respect for you will grow back. One day at a time. Love conquers all. God bless.
Noo, in this context, to love yourself is to be happy with who you are. Hating yourself and denying yourself are two different things. If you are not at peace with who you are, then how can you possibly know how to love others. Its like, if you cant forgive your own past, how can you forgive others?

Ive been where this guy has been. The hard reality is that if she has made up her mind, which seemingly she has, then theres not much more he can do. keep your eyes on God and stay prayerful!
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#9
Noo, in this context, to love yourself is to be happy with who you are. Hating yourself and denying yourself are two different things. If you are not at peace with who you are, then how can you possibly know how to love others. Its like, if you cant forgive your own past, how can you forgive others?

Ive been where this guy has been. The hard reality is that if she has made up her mind, which seemingly she has, then theres not much more he can do. keep your eyes on God and stay prayerful!

Kind of, if love is no longer served, time to leave the table. But it's not over until God says it's over. Trying to win her back does not mean he hates himself or he has no self respect. Her wife is deceived and being passive will not win her back. He has to do something.
 
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DaTK

Guest
#10
I prayed for this. Amen
 

levi85

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2013
8,578
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#11
Lord we pray for Knighz61, and his wife, lot remove their differences, and bind them with your love. yes Lord, please restore their relationship, where they live together happily, Please bless and heal this marriage, and protect from getting destroyed. Lord also make their youngest free from cancer. Lord please have your mercy upon this family , please bless this prayer, in Jesus Holy name, AMen!
 

lissy1265

Junior Member
Feb 16, 2017
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#12
Praying for you and your family. I am so sorry that you are struggling in your marriage and that your wife seems unresponsive. You are not able to control her thinking, but you can control what you do and how you respond. Giving her space is a good place to start. Have you thought about individual counseling?


Have you ever read the devotional "Jesus Calling" When things seems really wrong in my life I turn to it and the Bible. Stay connected to God through His Word. Here is a Jesus Calling devotional I use alot : "When you bring Me prayer requests, lay out your concerns before Me. Speak to Me candidly; pour out your heart. Then thank Me for the answers that I have set into motion long before you can discern results. When your requests come to mind again, continue to thank Me for the answers that are on the way. If you keep on stating your concerns to Me, you will live in a state of tension. When you thank Me for how I am answering your prayers, your mind-set becomes much more positive." —Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
Psalm 46:10 #BeStill #ThankfulPrayers #JesusCalling
A couple of my favorite verses I cling to are: Psalm 142:1-5, Isaiah 26:3-4, Joshua 1:9.