If your business was going to be successful, you would be with some money by now. (I've read your past posts.) I do get that finding a job was so hard that it didn't seem worth it, but something has changed. We have a new President. The market is jumping through the roof, which means finding a job is easier now. Business has confidence in growing again.
You made a decision three years ago that you would start your—pardon the correction; I have a tendency to correct misspelling in quotes—own business. It takes roughly 7 years to establish a business, but at year three you should at least have some money coming in. How about putting God first again, and doing what he wants you to do, instead of what you want to do?
Now, also, you aren't noticing something. You have been down and out for three years, at least, now. No money, and yet a place to live, food, and family. This is God taking care of you. This is divine providence, and yet you're still stuck on what you will do. Be grateful. He really has taken care of you. He still is.
Now, since you haven't had a job in at least three years, you will have to be creative in finding a new one. Volunteer. You're a member of a church. Ask the pastor which organizations could use some help. Soup kitchens? patients needing rides for appointments? Visiting the sick? What does your church do? Then help them. And while helping, let people know you need help too. First, it gets you out of your rut of only seeing what you need, and second ministries are always keeping their ears open for the very people they're trying to help. They learn who is willing to put in the effort and who isn't. And then they help those who are putting in the effort. It's called "networking." It's also called, "Love one another."
You're waiting for a miracle from God when he has been giving you them nonstop for three years. People are waiting for you to be their miracle from God.
