Prayer for right attitude about church

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ArtsieSteph

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
#1
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
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Arizona
#1
I'm a bit emotional right now, so I apologize if it seems I speak out of turn unintentionally.

Once again, I find myself not wanting to go to church. I like, I like singing, I like hearing about the word....and yet I don't want to go. I read a little every week, pray almost constantly in my head, but..... Why? Why don't I want to go to church? What kind of Christian doesn't want to go to church?!

I know it's normal not to feel like going all the time. But with me, it's like I always have an excuse. And sometimes when I don't, my body reacts so that I don't feel well and then can't make it. I know I'm saved, I know I need Him, I know everything I have is because of Him....I love Him, but I guess not enough to go to church!! I have OCD, ADD, and my dad has cancer. We pray every night and I'm happy to, we sing sometimes together in worship and I'm happy to....THEN WHY DON'T I WANT TO GO TO CHURCH!?!?!

There is a verse that specifically talks about not abandoning the gathering of yourselves together in worship: church. It's like....when I was very young I never wanted to go to church because it was obligatory to me I guess. When I was older like in highschool I decided once and for all that this wasn't about mom and dad dragging me there, it was about spending time with God. Then came college where I couldn't go sometimes, then came work where I worked on sundays and was way too tired afterward. And less time, less time, ect.

My attitude has changed I think without me knowing it. I'm a person who likes to take me time to recharge, and I can't do that much anymore with my father's situation. There's no time where it's just me, by myself. I have to be with people that are family or with dad, which I don't mind. But then I for some reason look forward to times when I can just be in the house by myself, which sadly tends to be church. And I don't make up things to skip going, that's not it at all. But after a while I feel like I am because my istant "ugh I don'wanna go" feeling comes up, then I panic going "WHY DO I NOT WANNA GO WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME" usually causes me to get upset and then feel bad, ect ect.

Has the concept of church changed in me? Is it no longer going to His house to be with Him? Has it become just another thing that I have to do in order to stay sane and saved? Have I become so legalistic that I think of it as something akin to going to the doctor? It's like when I'm there I am happy to be, I get to worship and have fellowship, but then once I leave it's like I subconsciously dread going again. WHY!?

What is wrong with me? Please pray God changes my attitude and/or helps me see what I need to change.
 
ArtsieSteph

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
#3
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
1,319
113
33
Arizona
#3
Sully said:
Nothing. Worship how you are led and He will lead you. Just my two cents. I don't like going either, so I don't.
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That's the weirdest thing. It's like my mind says yes when I am talking about it, but my initial jerk reaction is no.
 
levi85

levi85

Senior Member
#4
Jul 2, 2013
8,578
2,180
113
#4
Lord please bless Artsiesteph, in this matter. In Jesus name, Amen!
 
G00WZ

G00WZ

Senior Member
#5
May 16, 2014
1,313
447
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#5
There are times when i don't want to be around other people and i would just perfer to pray to God on my own..fellowship and being in church is good too.. but we are also the temple of God (1 Corinthians 3:16) .. Gods house is not a building made of brick and mortar, but of living flesh and he dwells inside of us. Its not about your church attendance record.. its about relationship, walking your life out, living in Christ, learning about who God is as he lives through you and doing his will, renewing your mind to the finished work of the cross, and leading others into the kindom by being the salt of the earth or that light in the darkness for the lost. ... There is nothing wrong with you, doing the same thing over and over again gets old over time. I will pray for your fire to be rekindled.
 
Blain

Blain

The Word Weaver
#6
Aug 28, 2012
19,211
2,547
113
#6
babe i am in the same boat. I recently visited this friend of mine of mine from a church i used to go to, you recall how i told you i went there with the flu begging for financial aid correct? well it was also during this time that he and i talked and his face just lit up talking to me and he even said how he always loves our talks because i have this spark about me and just by talking to me i naturally seem to encourage others there at the church. I haven't felt like going to church for the longest time and it irritates me because i forgot how much of an impact God makes on others when i go but at the same time i also know that for me personally if i do not feel God leading me to do or say something i don't do it because if I do it feels forced or fake and i have yet to see him work through me in that manner. of course i also am not held accountable for not going to church like you I don't have anyone to be upset with me if i don't go like you do so i can only think of you talking to your parents about all this which i know is not easy for you.

Also i am the same way in needing to be alone to recharge in fact it's actually very important that you do that because a lot of times life and people can affect your heart in a bad way even if they dont mean to. for instance in my house everyone is always stressed upset angry or worried in some way or another and it can sap the love and hope and strength right out of me because while i can connect and read and bond with people in a way that God has used to help heal and mend the inner wounds and scars inside people it also is a double edged sword because i can also be affected in the same way with the negative feelings like stress anger worry ect.

often times it's only in that still quite place i can find him, I often times have to purposely separate myself and go to my room by myself with him to be filled with love and hope and when i am recharged the entire day changes
 
ArtsieSteph

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
#7
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
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113
33
Arizona
#7
Maybe I just need to get to the place where church becomes that quiet place. It's not about other people, it's not about whatever, it's just Him and me time. Plus too if I wanted total alone and quiet time they have prayer meetings literally every day (not meetings as much as they open it up for anyone who wants to have some quiet prayer time)
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#8
Mar 13, 2014
41,305
16,297
113
69
Tennessee
#8
Jesus said that where 2 or 3 are gathered in His name that He will be in the midst of them. You go to church everyday without realizing it. There's nothing wrong with your attitude, you have just allowed yourself to be overwhelmed with the situation. You are in need of some serous alone time.
 
Silverwings

Silverwings

Senior Member
#9
Jul 27, 2016
1,368
495
83
#9
Maybe you do not need to change a thing, just listen to that still small voice inside, and obey it, since it is the Holy Spirit. I think the Lord is wanting to minister to you 'ALL BY HIMSELF", and how can he do that unless you learn to be still and just listen to him. That scripture that you mentioned has bothered me too, but there is also the scripture that says if your heart condemn you, God is greater than your heart. I have been out and I have been in church, and I personally like in better, but if you are not wanting to go, then there is a reason for that and only God has that answer, stay out for awhile and spend your time alone with him, or with other believers if he leads you that way. BE AT PEACE IN ALL THINGS.
 
Willie-T

Willie-T

Banned
#10
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#10
I find myself smiling at much of this. Because "church" is not about going to a building where God lives so you can sing songs to Him or pray to Him there. (Though that is what it has become to many of us.)

It actually IS almost all about working with a pretty large group of obstinate, irritating people who also claim to be Jesus followers..... and learning how to develop some sort of relationships with them that at least 'approaches' trying to be loving to one another.

We see this so clearly when we notice that we type that we want to be alone with God, but we do NOT want to be around all the other aggravating misfits (many of them as very much a mess as we are.) that He has adopted as His children.... the same as He did us.
 
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hornetguy

hornetguy

Senior Member
#12
Jan 18, 2016
6,639
1,392
113
#12
I have always found that when I lose my interest in going to meet with the church, it is because I am not actively involved in anything... I haven't been meeting with my small group... I'm not involved in a good class discussion.... something.

To me, church is not a place I go to find my quiet place... it is a place to go to interact/fellowship with other believers, which includes encouraging each other... listening to other brother/sister's problems or praises, and a place to join with others in worshiping and praising God.

It's sort of like going home for Thanksgiving or Christmas.... it's the fellowship...
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#13
#13
I find God in the quiet places when I pray. I go to church to be part of the body of Christ. That we might grow and shine our light together to gather the lost sheep back to God and encourage one another.

I find that when I am down, others lift me up. So I go to lift up others who may need prayer and encouragement because that is love.

I believe the enemy discourages people from attending church because he uses the "divide and conquer" war tactic. Satan wants believers isolated and alone.
 
K

kittycat7

Guest
#15
#15
For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father."
 
IDEAtor

IDEAtor

Senior Member
#16
Aug 15, 2012
827
19
18
#16
If the pastor and the people love you, then don't burn that bridge. Of course, going to a different church is an option for you-- even if you may think not. Being a dramatic-artistic type, you are open to the reality of the diversity of expression. Therefore, you do not like to be cornered congregationally. Yet, you do require to recharge, so it makes sense that churchianity expectations can annoy and tire you. However, you are someone who believes in and desires the spiritual connection with others. So... it makes sense that you are agitated.

Whatever you do, don't burn the bridge to the people you love or God has called you to. Sure, you may need to venture elsewhere for a while-- or forever-- but do not think that you are bad for losing the energy or excitement of how church is structured. On the flip side, don't assume that a church or person is bad for not meeting your momentary needs. Rather, wherever you are, praise God for those who have been faithful to God and ask Him how you can love where you are.

As for where you go or remain, remember to ask God for wisdom and direction and people to help you for today. We are not promised tomorrow, so how can we love someone today? How can God use us today? An answer to both questions: however He wants.

Random, I know. Wordy, yup. But I hope, as with the other posts, I hope you encounter God today.

--IDEA
 
A

ActivelyWaiting

Guest
#17
#17
ArtsieSteph said:
I'm a bit emotional right now, so I apologize if it seems I speak out of turn unintentionally. ...
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I don't think there is anything more wrong with you than any other person on this earth. :) Church can be a funny thing. I do not like it much either, but the Bible is full of verses that teach us we should regularly attend. I have been searching my whole life for a church family, but I get so disillusioned. I want it to be perfect ... how can it possibly be? I think we are compelled through Scripture to attend regularly with a joyful, positive, and giving heart. It leads to our growth and a softened heart.
 
L

LanceA

Guest
#18
#18
You know I haven't been active in a church in a very long time. I think a lot of us have seen some pretty bad church's and deep down in side we don't want to be apart of something bad when we know how it can be. I'd say, find a good bible study group and start there. Maybe from spending time with other Christians you will start feeling better about going to church.
 
KALYNA18

KALYNA18

Senior Member
#19
Oct 25, 2016
1,672
359
83
#19
ArtsieSteph said:
I'm a bit emotional right now, so I apologize if it seems I speak out of turn unintentionally.

Once again, I find myself not wanting to go to church. I like, I like singing, I like hearing about the word....and yet I don't want to go. I read a little every week, pray almost constantly in my head, but..... Why? Why don't I want to go to church? What kind of Christian doesn't want to go to church?!

I know it's normal not to feel like going all the time. But with me, it's like I always have an excuse. And sometimes when I don't, my body reacts so that I don't feel well and then can't make it. I know I'm saved, I know I need Him, I know everything I have is because of Him....I love Him, but I guess not enough to go to church!! I have OCD, ADD, and my dad has cancer. We pray every night and I'm happy to, we sing sometimes together in worship and I'm happy to....THEN WHY DON'T I WANT TO GO TO CHURCH!?!?!

There is a verse that specifically talks about not abandoning the gathering of yourselves together in worship: church. It's like....when I was very young I never wanted to go to church because it was obligatory to me I guess. When I was older like in highschool I decided once and for all that this wasn't about mom and dad dragging me there, it was about spending time with God. Then came college where I couldn't go sometimes, then came work where I worked on sundays and was way too tired afterward. And less time, less time, ect.

My attitude has changed I think without me knowing it. I'm a person who likes to take me time to recharge, and I can't do that much anymore with my father's situation. There's no time where it's just me, by myself. I have to be with people that are family or with dad, which I don't mind. But then I for some reason look forward to times when I can just be in the house by myself, which sadly tends to be church. And I don't make up things to skip going, that's not it at all. But after a while I feel like I am because my istant "ugh I don'wanna go" feeling comes up, then I panic going "WHY DO I NOT WANNA GO WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME" usually causes me to get upset and then feel bad, ect ect.

Has the concept of church changed in me? Is it no longer going to His house to be with Him? Has it become just another thing that I have to do in order to stay sane and saved? Have I become so legalistic that I think of it as something akin to going to the doctor? It's like when I'm there I am happy to be, I get to worship and have fellowship, but then once I leave it's like I subconsciously dread going again. WHY!?

What is wrong with me? Please pray God changes my attitude and/or helps me see what I need to change.
Click to expand...
 
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