I’m so sorry to hear about your situation, girl. I appreciate your willingness to connect with us here. My heart ached as I read your post, and I wish I could give you a hug. I cannot imagine going through what you're experiencing. I just said a prayer for you, asking God to bless you with a good job, provide for all your needs, and surround you with His comfort, strength, and peace. Please know that you’re not alone and you can always come here to share. Have you considered talking to a counselor? Do you think that's something that might be helpful for you personally? I know it’s not easy right now, but stay strong. Love & hugs to you!