Prayer for a relationship w/ Girl who is separated

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Jan 4, 2009
15
0
0
#1
Hello,

Thank you for taking the time to read my post. About 5 months ago i started dating a girl who was going through a separation. about 2 months ago her husband came back into the picture and we kinda went our own ways. she and i recently started speaking again, and says she is going to make the divorce final in january.

my heart is really torn because i fell in love with the girl. at the same time she is very beautiful and for reasons i cannot pinpoint, i feel as though i cannot trust her.

im so messed on this because on the one hand i very much care for her and love her. on the other hand i feel like what im doing is wrong. i just do not know what to do.

she said her husband became addicted to pain pills, because she has a back problem. i dont know what to believe to be honest. it seems as though this girl is not always honest. i just dont understand. when we met i had prayed that evening that God would place someone in my life, and she said that same evening she prayed the same thing. so immediately i opened my heart, perhaps without knowing all the facts.

she gets alot of attention whereever we go, and often times she is very flirtatious which scares me very much.

she says she is a Christian, but sometimes i think her actions say otherwise.

please lift me up in my prayer. i dont want to give up on a relationship that is good, because i dont trust her, when maybe i really should. i just dont know.

im really torn on this. any prayers or advice would be greatly appreciated.

thank you
 
W

woodl

Guest
#2
Hello,

Thank you for taking the time to read my post. About 5 months ago i started dating a girl who was going through a separation. about 2 months ago her husband came back into the picture and we kinda went our own ways. she and i recently started speaking again, and says she is going to make the divorce final in january.

my heart is really torn because i fell in love with the girl. at the same time she is very beautiful and for reasons i cannot pinpoint, i feel as though i cannot trust her.

im so messed on this because on the one hand i very much care for her and love her. on the other hand i feel like what im doing is wrong. i just do not know what to do.

she said her husband became addicted to pain pills, because she has a back problem. i dont know what to believe to be honest. it seems as though this girl is not always honest. i just dont understand. when we met i had prayed that evening that God would place someone in my life, and she said that same evening she prayed the same thing. so immediately i opened my heart, perhaps without knowing all the facts.

she gets alot of attention whereever we go, and often times she is very flirtatious which scares me very much.

she says she is a Christian, but sometimes i think her actions say otherwise.

please lift me up in my prayer. i dont want to give up on a relationship that is good, because i dont trust her, when maybe i really should. i just dont know.

im really torn on this. any prayers or advice would be greatly appreciated.

thank you
Hello to you too my friend. Love is a beautiful thing if it's brought together by God, but don't let beauty over ride God will. Seek God Will and wait on him, he'll let you know. Trust is the most importance thing there is in a relationship other than salvation through Jesus Christ. Don't let satan use beauty to get you to make the wrong move. God Bless
Omighty God I lift up this young man to you in the name of Jesus. Give him Lord a strong mind and the wisdom to make the right choice. In the name of Jesus I pray, amen.
 
A

Avidan

Guest
#3
This is blunt, but it will save you from a multitude of troubles:

Pro 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
Pro 6:26 For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life.

Read proverbs as far as you are able. Some of them won't make sense, don't scoff at them, they have more meaning than can be seen at a glance. But, the ones about keeping yourself from an adulterous woman are easy to be understood. She does not belong to you, nor is she abiding in Christ with the fruit that she is showing in her life. You know a tree by it's fruit. I strongly suggest to run from her and run to Christ. Examine your own faith. Look at the fruit you are bearing.

Read these verses below thoroughly to examine your faith, and instead of trying to justify yourself concerning any of them, stand on Christ and claim his righteousness, not yours.

[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]2Co 13:5 Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves...

1Cor 15:33 Stop being deceived: "Wicked friends lead to evil ends."

1 Cor 6:9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,
1 Cor 6:10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.

2 Tim 3:1 But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come:
2 Tim 3:2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
2 Tim 3:3 unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good,
2 Tim 3:4 traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
2 Tim 3:5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!

Gal 6:7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man sows, that shall he also reap.

Gal 5:19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
Gal 5:20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
Gal 5:21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings...[/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]
Rom 1:29 ...filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers,
Rom 1:30 Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,
Rom 1:31 Without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: [/FONT]




[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Rom 1:32 Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]

Jas 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
Jas 2:11 For he that said, Do not commit adultery, said also, Do not kill. Now if thou commit no adultery, yet if thou kill, thou art become a transgressor of the law.

Mat 5:22 But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell.

Mat 5:28 ...I say unto you, That whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Rom 6:23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.[/FONT]


....................................................................

Ok, now stand on Christ:

[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Isa 41:10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Isa 41:11 Behold, all they that were incensed against thee shall be ashamed and confounded: they shall be as nothing; and they that strive with thee shall perish.
Isa 41:12 Thou shalt seek them, and shalt not find them, even them that contended with thee: they that war against thee shall be as nothing, and as a thing of nought.
Isa 41:13 For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.

Isa 54:17 No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD.

Jer 33:14 Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will perform that good thing which I have promised unto the house of Israel and to the house of Judah.
Jer 33:15 In those days, and at that time, will I cause the Branch of righteousness to grow up unto David; and he shall execute judgment and righteousness in the land.
Jer 33:16 In those days shall Judah be saved, and Jerusalem shall dwell safely: and this is the name wherewith she shall be called, The LORD our righteousness.

Rom 2:28 For he is not a Jew, which is one outwardly; neither is that circumcision, which is outward in the flesh:
Rom 2:29 But he is a Jew, which is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart, in the spirit, and not in the letter; whose praise is not of men, but of God.

2Co 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
2Co 5:18 And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;
2Co 5:19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.
2Co 5:20 Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ's stead, be ye reconciled to God.
2Co 5:21 For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.

Rom 8:33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth.

..................................................................

Now, if any of the fruit of 'wickedness' starts to tempt you into thinking that you are not right with God, then confess that fruit to a Christian brother and pray with him to the LORD for forgiveness. If you don't have anyone to talk to, call the 700 club / cbn prayer line. Confess also specific things/deeds that continue to haunt your thoughts.

This is washing your hands, the Lord will purify Your heart by His blood, exalting you to His righteousness as you humble yourself in confession. This will stop the double mindedness that is tearing you in two directions. The Lord wants you know know your left from your right and you can not serve two masters.

Jas 4:4 Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.
Jas 4:5 Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy?
Jas 4:6 But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.
Jas 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
Jas 4:8 Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.

So stand on Christ and let him purify your heart through humility bringing your bad fruit into the light:

Joh 3:14 And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up:
Joh 3:15 That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have eternal life.
Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Joh 3:17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
Joh 3:18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.
Joh 3:19 And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.
Joh 3:20 For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.
Joh 3:21 But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.


Do truth. Come into the light.

1Jn 1:5 This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
1Jn 1:6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:
1Jn 1:7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
1Jn 1:8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
1Jn 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1Jn 1:10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

Die to sin, live to Christ. (read the book of Romans)


Heb 12:1 Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
Heb 12:2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Heb 12:3 For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.
Heb 12:4 Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin.
Heb 12:5 And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him:
Heb 12:6 For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.
Heb 12:7 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?
Heb 12:8 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.
Heb 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
Heb 12:10 For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness.
Heb 12:11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
Heb 12:12 Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees;
Heb 12:13 And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed.

Don't forget to read proverbs :)

Heavenly Father, I lift my brother up to you. Perfect love in his heart. Perfect it in all of our hearts. Forgive him and take notice of what he has already brought into the light, going in Your way and walking towards You in the best way he knows how. Keep him safe and fight against his enemies (eph 6:12) In Jesus Name, Amen.
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tribesman

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2011
4,612
274
83
#4
...my heart is really torn because i fell in love with the girl. at the same time she is very beautiful and for reasons i cannot pinpoint, i feel as though i cannot trust her.

im so messed on this because on the one hand i very much care for her and love her. on the other hand i feel like what im doing is wrong. i just do not know what to do.

... i just dont understand. when we met i had prayed that evening that God would place someone in my life, and she said that same evening she prayed the same thing. so immediately i opened my heart, perhaps without knowing all the facts.

she gets alot of attention whereever we go, and often times she is very flirtatious which scares me very much.

she says she is a Christian, but sometimes i think her actions say otherwise...
Man, be extremely cautititous with this one and prepare to get out in right time.

Have been in similar situation myself and seen not a few others in same, it always ended in problems. Be happy if you can get out of this without too much wounds. Take heed, I say.

These then are my advice.

With my prayers.
 

pickles

Senior Member
Apr 20, 2009
14,479
182
63
#5
You are, and continue to be in my daily prayers in Jesus.
Also, continueing to pray for your family as well.

God bless
pickles
 
S

shekaniah

Guest
#6
I will be praying for God to reveal the truth, and give you wisdom...in Jesus name amen
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#7
Sounds to me like you already know the right thing to do, but your letting your emotions get in the way. I know it can be painful, but sometimes doing the right thing hurts. I suggest you set aside emotion and lust and ask yourself what you really think of this person. From my perspective, you had nothing good to say about this woman other than physical beauty. That should be telling.
 
X

xtinaz

Guest
#8
I have had a similar incident with a male. I thought God was in it with timing and the crazy attractiveness but at the same time it wasnt in proportion. I thought God wasnt talking to me - ild constantly be wanting more and more confirmation however my unrest and lack of peace was a great sign that needed no confirmation. Anything that takes his speace away is a good indication that it is out of alignment with his will. Wanting the relationship and companioship can often cloud Gods input because we put it first.

6months it stole my focus from God...dont trust her, trust God :)

You know what to do, Make a decision and take that step, there is great freedom in it :)

Prayers with you
 
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X

xtinaz

Guest
#9
Excuse my advice, apologies it is a testimony in a Christian perspective :)