Peace in a raging storm

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Should I remain friends with this person despite their continued behavior?

  • Yes

    Votes: 2 66.7%

  • No

    Votes: 1 33.3%
  • Total voters
    3
  • Poll closed .
mercyswolf

mercyswolf

Banned
#1
Feb 9, 2009
1,743
6
0
38
#1
Ok guys I don't ask for much here and some of you are very good friends since I started here in CC. I don't think I've mentioned this until now but my soon to be ex wife and I started divorce proceedings not long ago. The problem is that I have a friend who's pressuring me for all it's worth to fight for sole custody of my child. What this person doesn't realize is that my wife and I have agreed that as long as I continue to stay in contact with my son and have something to do with him she won't persue child support, alimony and so forth and if I were to persue such actions against my wife then she would quite literally take me for everything I'm worth and then some. I have become much stronger with my walk with Christ though I don't have a lot of time for church, prayer and so forth I do make time to at least pray and read my Bible lol. The other thing this person doesn't realize is that the Bible tells us to love one another and it also lists various other verses about how to love our neighbors. This person has mentioned before that they disagree with my idea of how I interpret the bible and they also apparently think that all divorces are supposed to be knock down drag out fights and that we're not supposed to get along with our ex's or their new significant others. Though as of right now I have not caved to this or any of this persons other theories about how I should manage my divorce and how I should get along with others, this person has been a long time friend of mine for about two years now and though I don't want to lose a close friend I'm starting to worry that I won't have much of a choice in the matter but to dismiss this person from my life. This leaves me with one other question. Should I remain friends with this person or let them go? Your thoughts and prayers would be much appreciated.

Thanks,

Mercy
 
K

Kite

Guest
#2
#2
Eeyah....I'm really sorry for what you're going through. (sorry because I'm only 16) But eh, maybe you've thought about it already, but I think that you shouldn't follow your friend's advice, not just for your wife's sake but also for your son too. About you continuing to be friends with this person, are they a Christian? And it all really comes down to your decision and what you think (gut feeling?) Is this person helping you in your walk or bringing you down?
I think prayer would help a lot, just asking God what you should do.
I'm sorry, not much else to say other than I'll be praying for you.
 
whiteknite

whiteknite

Banned
#3
Jan 9, 2009
819
4
0
#3
Having been married and then divorced, I feel for you very much. You didn't mention how long you & your friend knew each other so I suppose it is less then you've known your wife. I don't have any children from my marriage, but we did manage to get along during the divorce settlement, despite what all the neighbors and her friends were saying. When they approached me, wanting to learn something to spread as gossip, they left rather disappointed. I didn't deny or admit anything to them. I also told them as politely as I could that they didn't need to concern themselves with our divorce, and thanked them for their concern. (In other words, mind their own business)

I figured that way they couldn't say I was rude, nor could they say I said anything....
So I guess the best suggestion I can give is to stick to the arrangement you have with your soon to be ex wife. Also, maybe find some way to tell your friend you appreciate him being in your corner, but things are under control.

But most importantly: Pray for the Lord to guide you before you decide to say anything to your friend.
May the Lord be with you thru this sad & difficult time in your life.
 
grace

grace

Senior Member
#4
Sep 8, 2006
1,064
11
0
51
#4
Mercywolf.....I completly understand where you are coming from. NOONE understood my stance on things with my divorce.

You are the one that is accountable for your actions. You are the one that is accountable for how you react to her actions. AND, you are the one that will answer to God. you are the one that will answer to your son (if/when he asks you when he is older what happened.

Divorce is one of those things that is deeply personal. The decisions are often complex and very emotional.

Lots of *advice* is often given.....but true friends are there for you no matter what. I hope that your friend can understand that you are hurting, and trying to get through a very painful time in your life and that *harassing* you concerning your decisions only adds more stress.

With that said, I would still continue the friendship and truly hope that their behavior changes towards you and your decisions.

Best to you! I still pray for your situaion.
 
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