Struggling with my mom

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Jordache

Guest
#1
Im really having a hard time with my mom. Being her only girl, I get it 10x worse than my brothers an they just don't get it. She goes on crazed rampages and says so many hurtful things
. The day my father died, a few weeks ago, she was driving me back to the airport and decided to ream me about how horrible of a daughter I was, how I need to forgive her, and the 10,000 other things I need to do to meet her needs. She wants me to be her best friend and she is just not safe. To make matters worse, she puts my brothers against me. She is severly co-dependent and boundary resistant. She interprets a texting response that is too few words or takes more than 5 seconds as a sign that I hate her and she'll never see her grandkids.
I am trying to set boundaries with her but she responds like a child and tell me horrible things. I just can't handle her thinking I'm the source of all her problems.
 
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bealight2012

Guest
#2
Stay strong. Tame your tongue. Pick up your cross and never look back. ^^ He loves you, even if the world doesnt.
 
May 25, 2011
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#3
Maybe she is still devastated by the loss.
Pray for her grief to end and for a better relationship.
Don't only pray. Believe that its going to happen. Have faith that the lord will actually do these things.

I'll pray for you♥
 
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soccergirl1

Guest
#4
I know how hard it is to deal with the pain of someone you love treating you in ways you dont deserve. I've realized a lot through troubles with my own mother that silence is safer than hurtful words. Although cruel things are being said to you, find strength within yourself through the holy spirit to be the bigger person. From what you wrote it seems that the loss of your father could be affecting her but she needs to also realize that affects you and hurtful words are the last thing that should be transferred between the two of you. Her turning your brothers against you is cruel and they will face God one day and he will recite their every sin, this being one of them. Stay strong and believe that things will get better. God wishes for your joy and happiness and if you ask him for things to get better he will be sure to give that to you. Pray, lean on him day to day, and have patience. Things will work out in your best interest in time.
 
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psychomom

Guest
#5
I seek the Lord's wisdom and intervention on your behalf, beloved of your Father! ♥

When I was younger I asked and asked God to vindicate me in my parents' eyes...this was an unrighteous prayer, as I prayed it. I was only looking at it pridefully. :( (I'm not in a million years implying you're doing this, but, confess your sins to one another, yeah?)

My point is that once I repented of that, many years later the things my mom and dad had shamed be about, they turned around and praised me for!
I pray this may also be your experience, dear one. May the Lord vindicate Himself, and bring your family into submission to His Truth.
And may He heal your broken heart.

~ellie ♥


 
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sound7

Guest
#6
I will pray for you my sister, Be STILL and know that I AM YOUR GOD, FEAR NOT and know that I AM WITH YOU. I pray that everything around you be absolutely silent in the name of Jesus, every words spoken against you be still and you will know that HE IS your banner, Pray that your mother be set free, healed, restored and reconciled to the KING and HIS KINGDOM,. That she find her strength in the Lord. peace with the Prince of kings and that JESUS WILL ARREST HER with HIS LOVE, apprehend her with HIS GRACE, shower her with compassion, strengthen her with HIS MIGHTY RIGHTEOUS HAND, embrace her with HIS glorious Presences and chain her as prisoner of righteousness. AMEN GOD BLESS YOU
 
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wwjd_kilden

Guest
#7
*hugs* I don't know what to say, but you have my prayers.
 
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beryl

Guest
#8
Jordahce, I would pray for you, i have experienced of such situation with my mo, she judged me so easliy when she wanted, when i drop some hair in the lor, when her belove sister come and ask me acompany with her going out for meal or shopping or even to the fortune teller....thats crazy , when i think of this, may god condamn it. ( justshowing that how much she could bought), when i rejected her polienesstly, i would be scold harshly by mom even i was got seriously sickness... " why you become so cold to her, why you are abnormal! and assault and battery...she compare me with anygirl she knew outside, i hve to admit, i m not beauty. there are many such caseshad happened i cant remeber, and i dont want to , but we must to stand firm, for the Lord, what Jesus say" forgetting those things which are behind".

we know as a mom may love her chirld, asking to be a friend can be understanding, but its a really a matter that she is not in the Lord and without reason urging, sometimes i dont understand why they hated me ingut, and just not know why my aunt 'love' me so muchthat she seems want me more than be a friend, she want to know everything about me, or may just privaty life.i ve no idea thats weird.:) maybe she jsut want me to praise her 2 son soth who as an adult but nevergrauted at high school....I hate doing the things that i dont want to, from now on, at least,i preasure my new life in Jesus, anything she ask me do, i did it. what do they want,i dont mind, God knows, May GOD love them .I love them.

Rejoice evermore. 5:17 Pray without ceasing.
Jesus love us.
 
Mar 18, 2011
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#9
one of my grandmothers was that way her whole life. Very mean and judgmental. She would act like your best friend and then in a moment read into something that wasn't there and suddenly everyone was out to get her, take her things or her health. I only got to really meet her last year. The whole family was tattered over her, dreading to see her because she sucked the very life out of them. I went and stayed with her. I showed her love. The kind of love that she wasn't used to. It took a very long time for her to say she loved me back. I'd say, I love you grandma, she would say. I appreciate that very much. The longer I stayed the more the more I got to see her demeanor change when others were around. They would do nothing but try to help her and she'd turn vicious. The words from her mouth were completely vulgar. The hatred was explosive, every feature in her face would change and would resemble absolute evil. Enough that I would begin praying within myself just to let the light come back into the room because I felt that the darkness was so great it was attempting to contaminate my chest. I eventually could no longer coddle her. She had a bible and would say she believed in God, so I began talking to her about it, and after 3 days of continuing to talk about God and looking into the bible, I was alarmed to see that though she claimed to be christian she couldn't tell me Jesus was her Lord, I thought even someone senile could say such a thing, but not someone possessed, she blew up viciously talking about my family who were trying to get her property and kill her, I told her very directly that there are only 2 things in this world, those of God and those of Satan. I looked her straight in the eyes and told her that the fury was not of God. She settled into the idea, didn't like it any, but it took a little of the fire away. I left the state, I'm back home now. I don't know how she is doing up there, all I do know is it is out of my control. And that is the moral of my story to you. We may love someone so much it hurts, but in the end all we can do is love them enough to have patience and attempt to understand them, but if what keeps coming is evil, we can only pray. God bless you sister
 

Lucy68

Senior Member
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
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#10
Praying for healing for you and your mom :)
 
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shekaniah

Guest
#11
Jordache,

You are on the right track, you set the boundries...and she will try to move them.
Just keep praying and giving it to Jesus. He is the only one who can vindicate you.
Keep loving her through the love of Christ, and God will take care of the rest.
I will be praying for you and your whole family.
In the love of Christ, Shekaniah
 
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Jordache

Guest
#12
It's just hard when I feel like I need my mom, but the mother I have requires me to self-protect at all times. She is very broken and I understand why she says what she does, but I just can't let her run me over anymore. I love my mom, but I really don't like her much. She is dangerous for me. She curses me and speaks lies. I have a lotus compassion for her, but I just can't let her keep saying what he does. I wish she judged me for leaving hair on the floor, but she attacks my very core identity.
I try to love my mom. I try to help her but everything gets thrown in my face. This is not to say I'm any better than she is, but she needs healing and she wants to get it from me.
 

pickles

Senior Member
Apr 20, 2009
14,479
182
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#13
Praying for you and your mom in Jesus.
Just keep asking Jesus to give you His love and wisdom for you mom. :)

Huge hugs and God bless
pickles