life just fell apart

I have been having some people pray for me in the prayer chat, but I wanted to post, I need a lot of prayer here, I have been going through a lot of struggles over the last few years, and everything finally seemed ok, then the bottom fell out, my wife suffers from mental illness and has once again been in and out of the hospitals for the last four weeks, she decided all of the sudden she hates me and went somewhere else instead of coming home, she won't talk to me, I have no idea where she is, I have been a good husband these last 12 years, I have stood by her through all of this and all the dozens of times she has been hospitalized, and the hundred and hundreds of doctors visits, and the break downs etc . I have always stood right by her and been the best husband I could be. I am just broken right now, after everything we have been through, I have no strength left, we are poor people ad she left me with all the bills, alone by myself and my health going bad, I am grateful for this site, and the fact that people have prayed for me, it's just going to be one day at a time, I am going to need a lot of prayer I have had to take the money to pay the utilities and pay other bills that weren't paid, so the lights will be off tuesday morning,lights water etc, it's going to be a couple of weeks living in the dark, I somehow have to get through this and manage to keep working. I am having trouble doing anything right now as this has been such a shock to me what just happened. The only thing that will get me through this is God, I will keep praying to him to let me survive, I seriously considered suicide a couple of days ago,but he pulled me thorough that, I know thats a sin but I was that far down. Let me as also would be be appropriate to ask for help with the utilities? if not I will remove that reference, I would be just as happy knowing people care enough to pray, I am at that point where I can't help myself back up. If it's appropriate you can pm me and I can tell you how to contact the city directly. That would be a huge help,right now I'm going to make myself get up and make something to eat. I put the prayer room on last night and slept on the floor in my computer room listening to the prayers. Thanks Tim

Praying .

i'm going to try and go get something to eat that's cheap have to get out of this house haven't left this room in 48 hours

I'm so sorry to hear that. Do you think that maybe it's not your wife who hates you, but her illness telling you she does? I'm sure you know that illness and hospitalization can be very damaging to the patient as well as their family; she couldn't really hate you. I'll be praying for her. I'll be praying about your bills and holding things togther too. Remember that you aren't alone in this. You have The King of Kings on your side. Sometimes God provides things right when you need them, and I mean RIGHT when you need them. Be sure to take a lot of time to focus on the Lord and his love. Never lose sight of Him. You are safe and completely protected.

Tim, you are in my daily prayers in Jesus name as also your wife , marraige and all needs.
Although life has been taken to a broken place, know that Jesus is close to the broken hearted.
I just want to witness to when life was at the bottem in our lives, that was when Jesus was not just the closest, but I came to know Him more than I ever thought possible. And yes, it was all worth it!
May the presance , glory and love of Jesus fill you and surround you , so much so that you will remember one day, this time, as the most prescious in your walk with Jesus.

God bless
pickles

Praying and agreeing with my family in christ, in Jesus Name, Amen

I dont know what is going on,she called about the car, very hateful and ugly towards me, I didn't even recognize the person I was talking to, Please keep praying for the restoration of our marriage, I've always been a good faithful husband to her, I just dont understand this at all, This is my best friend in the entire world and she suddenly hates me, I feel something has come over her, we were very close so this is just tearing my heart out.

Lord, I ask you to shine your light on this marriage. You told us you will bind up our wounds and dry our tears. I ask that you do that here. Please help these people to solve this situation, and mend broken hearts with Your perfect love. Amen

I can see how this would be devastating

Is she undergoing treatment for her mental issues? Try to understand that it probably isn't 'you' she's reacting to, but it is her mental state that is causing her to act this way.

Praying for you and for your wife....may God lead her into recovery.

im alive on a neighbors computer lights are off couldn't come up with the difference , I wanted to thank the wonderful couple on here who helped me with at least part of the bill, God bless you I will get through this mess somehow

I wonder if it's not you that she hates, but herself.

Sometimes people will act hateful to people whose mere existence makes them feel guilty. Guilt is supposed to lead us to redemption but some people will react completely wrong and turn on whoever, or whatever, is making them feel guilty.

I know it's hard but try not to take this too personally, like thinking that you have done something wrong. Some emotional distance will help you to see what's really going on with her.

In my town, we have an organization that will help people with their electric bill...you may want to see what services are offered in your area.

Praying continually for you....be strong

she tells to me today says how much happier she is without me,that she hadn't love me for a long time, why do people do this? you put your heart and soul in loving someone and find out it's been a lie, talk about sticking a knife in your heart and twisting it. his is the kind of stuff that makes you not even want to be alive, I'm starting to show early signs of Parkinson,which my grandfather started getting at 45, probably have diabetes now and the doctor at the cash clinic found a possible lump in my side where I've been hurting, all this and my life partner who was supposed o have been my best friend was apparently lying to me for a long time, why does god let this happen?

it hurts really bad after 12 years of marriage and putting everything you had in someone and loving them with every bit of your heart,to find out they were lying

omgosh i am so sorry that you are experiencing this kind of pain .. in your heart.. I just posted this video of lacey from flyleaf. I know this is not the time where you might not want to be listening to music and stuff. but let me tell you .. if you never have heard of flyleaf its a christian band.. and this girl is famous. & she is deffintly an amazing person/ has an awesome testimony.. ill put the youtube link at the bottom of my message and you must watch it! now listen.. let me tell you something. im 21 years old.. and ive battled depression to the max... been to the darkest of dark places ... You have to have a big heart to be feeling the way your feeling... I actually attempted suicide when I was 17 years old. And let me tell you.. God had to have been watching over me or i just had awesome luck... I like to believe it was God but anyway.. listen.. you can over come this.. so many people will try to comfort you .. you can go out with your christian friends.. but Untill you let God fill the void in your heart, and you put him first.. the depression will stay. You NEED to read your bible hun.. and pray... pray pray pray.. find scriputre topics your interested in, repent.. Let God fill you and open your heart, TALK to him... there was a time in my life where I had been away from God for years, and I started having heart problems and I knew I was in trouble becasue I was not where I needed to be with my walk with the Lord. well let me tell you I just started talking to God, I had the faith that he was listening. and let him know what was hurting me, what was bothering me. what I was sorry for .. also let me tell you. I am no angel.. Ive fallen.. came back.. messed up big time.. came back.. messed up...but God has done miricale after miricale in my life... Try your best not to resort to medicine, it only helps for a little bit..


if your anything like me you may not even read this whole message.. but i totally know what your going through.. I hope you make it through it! you can with God's help !!

Lacey Sturm&#39;s Testimony - YouTube <3 watch thiss.. its the testimony i mentioned earlier in my message sorry for the length.. i just have a heart for people that are going through what you are going through!

My Brother, Tim ...

Permit me to have the privilege of praying for you, my friend ... indeed, it may seem like you have been given more than you carry at this moment. Many of us share your hurt, lonliness and sadness. DO know that the Father is there with you right now. He will never leave you or any of His children, ever.

I pray that God will send His blessed Archangels, Raphael, Gabriel and Michael, to you right now to heal you, guide you and protect you. And I ask Jesus to reach down and touch your life at this moment in His loving, gentle way ... to lift you up as on wings of eagles ...

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

Your brother in Christ,

John
Phoenix, AZ