I am going through the same thing emotional affair with another women older I than and big beer gut? she likes t drink so he would go to her house to do side work then they would drink together, share problems and all, he did the same brushed it under the rug. would get mad if i said anything, accused me of accusing him, one night he did not come home from work and we found him there he ws drunk passed out in her bed, said she just made him go sleep it off, because he could not drive? this is cheating to me , he now left saying he is sick of me accusing him of this and he will keep her as a friend as that is all they are. I know how you are feeling. It can tear you apart as you are not the one to bleme here but they make you feel as if it is all your fault, how old is your husband?I feel mine is going through a mid life crisis, it is usually trigered by an emotional happening, in my husbands case a job loss, also worked with this women, this is how they met. I will pray for your marriage and if you need to talk just message me, we may be able to help each other.