Trapped and Empty

I feel trapped in this life- mentally, physically, situationally. I can accept the daily suffering but I can't accept the idea of God sitting by passively and allowing this, even if He doesn't cause it. He is all powerful and yet we are still left empty in many ways. It seems cheap and cruel. I really pray to die before I crash and spiral again and again in circles. I despise this cumbersome life. I've had my share of imprisonment, stripping, scourging, mocking, beating in my own ways, and I haven't fallen from the faith, but my will is gone. I've wanted to die for years and I pray and pray and never get a word, not even a prophetic word with substance. I can't take it. It's easy for people to tell me to suck it up, but that lack of empathy is not of God. My own mother told me I'm better off dead than living like this, and she's right. I pray it is the will of God to show His mercy and take my life. Let Him be glorified because Lord knows the mental torture, emptiness, and lack of direction are slowly killing me anyway. I feel the expiration date on my life is well over. God, I can't believe I'm still alive some days. Please pray it ends, truly. Is there any tangible mercy in Heaven above?

i will pray for you.

I know, another bible verse, but just maybe this will help...with prayer.

For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, insomuch that we despaired even of life: But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead: Who delivered us from so great a death, and doth deliver: in whom we trust that he will yet deliver us;
(2Co 1:8-10)

You continue in my prayers in Jesus's name.

I know all you speak to, and why .
But Jesus can and will show you the greatness of His love, and His victory over all you suffer.
He did for me.
I will give you a task, a simple one, but one that can open the door to Jesus's peace and victory in your life.
Jesus said, to follow me, one must set oneself aside.
So today, do not look to your own suffering, but to praying for the sufferings of others.
Set the needs of others before God in Jesus's name with praise and thanksgiving.
Sometimes we are so busy looking at the sorrows, that we fail to keep our eyes on Jesus.
So take your eyes off all the sorrows, so you will be able to see Jesus.

I know this might seem difficult, as you spoke to why would God allow such things to be?
If you desire is understanding, you must stop focusing on what you think God should do, and get to know God.
To know God, is to trust all to Him, even to the point of compleat surrender to His will , even when you dont agree with it.
Begin with this, in Jesus.
Peace beyond understanding, will be found in Jesus.

Ill continue to keep you in my prayers in Jesus.

I once was where you are, and now no longer, peace is in Jesus.

God bless
pickles

I have prayed for you GM77, I would like to suggest something that has worked pretty well in my life. It would be good if you write down all the painful issues bothering you in a page and write individual prayer's for each of those issues, you can make a prayer book.This technique really helped me, but you need to keep your prayer's secret so don't show it to anyone.Besides this I am reading a very good book , perhaps this may help you too.Name of the book is "The purpose driven life" written by "Rick Warren" for more information you can visit Purpose Driven Life - What On Earth Am I Here For? , in case you need more information you can message me. The author is a pastor of Saddleback church in Lake Forest , CALIFORNIA, AMERICA. May God be with you.

GM777, I hear the Lord say to you " seek me with all your heart release everything to Me and come to the foot of My cross and release all your hurts, all your pain, all your anguish and I will take it from you. Don't carry all that pain any more, give it to Me. And forgive forgive forgive forgive everybody who has ever hurt you, because you see if you do not forgive My Father can not forgive your sins and that is what is making you sick and miserable and tormented. Let go of all the hurt and offenses and forgive. You do not have a choice YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE. Release everything to Me and forgive EVERYBODY and see what I will do for you. It is your choice to forgive. And you also have to forgive yourself, Otherwise I cannot move on your behalf. Come and leave everything at the foot of my cross, come today".

GM777, how are you doing?
You continue in my daily prayers in Jesus's name.

God bless
pickles

Send her someone to p.m. her Lord, love her , embrace, her and talk with her. In the physical this all could be done, but will it bring healing? Talk to the Father through Jesus name, John 17, he never will leave you empty, he said, if you ask the Father for BREAD, he will not give you a STONE.

No matter the age, GM. Something better could be at the long run... I hope you overcome that paintoiling situation.

Jesus suffered the worse. Longsuffering is required for spiritual growth, sorta like a muscle.

That is a problem. Don't want to be here, but you can't leave. I hear ya, I wrestle with that every day. Hardly a day goes by that I don't pray, Lord, today someone will die who doesn't want to, please take me instead. And I mean it, even the best day in this hell-hole is absolutely nada compared to the worst day in what we have to come. When I think that in the next twinkling of my eye I could be partying before the Throne of God... here, mugger mugger mugger! Puhleaze!

I was 17 when I tried to make the leap by my own hand, obviously it failed and I'm still here. And I've gone on to be used by God to affect many people's lives for the better, and to do that is a blessing. Yet hardly a day goes by when I don't wish in some way that it had worked. Would'a saved me 40 years of livin' in satan's cesspool. But I promised God I wouldn't try it again.

Jesus says we will suffer this world. We are in it not of it. To Christ's enemies (ie satan and his horde) we are like a drop of water in a bottle of oil. The oil can't outright destroy it, but it'll do everything it can to isolate and expel the drop. Paul suffered, and wished to move on (For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain Phil 1:21+), but thought it necessary to remain in the body. He also said in 1 Thess 3:8 for now we live, if you are standing fast in the Lord.

You don't have to like it here. In fact, if you do, that's when I would worry. I've often said that you can tell how much potential one has in the kingdom of God by how hard satan works to hold them under. And it sound like he's been working overtime on you.

satan attacks me every day, because my faith in Christ makes me his enemy. And honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. You shouldn't either.