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I Learnt To Spread My Wings And Fly
Hi. My name is Shania Moore. I'm 16. I'm from Trinidad, an island In The Caribbean.
God is A Good God and over the past year I have been battling with myself. Last year October 1st, I got into a relationship with a guy. I really liked him because we had been best friends for a year and more. From this relationship, I must say that I understood the meaning of the quote "not all things that glitter is gold". He was a very verbally abusive person. He told me mean stuff daily, made me cry and yet I was the fool to not let go. Eventually two months after, I did. I cried everyday, wanting him back for myself and I did get him back. However, during that one week of our break up, a friend told me, "Shania, when God closes a door means he has a better one in store." At that time, I hated those words because I was "in love". When We made back up, I think it was at the beginning of December, things seemed better at first. On the night of December 31st, I prayed to God to remove anything that is hindering me from a relationship with him in the new year. Coincidently, the year started of badly with us. He got me into sexual activities with him. He even ALMOST got me into the act of copulation itself. But God always work things out before the obvious worst. A Saturday morning I got up and messaged him. I told him, "you're acting as if we're not together". He apparently took that the wrong way and said I broke up with him. That was it! It was over! I didn't know what to do anymore. I came home from school one day after cutting myself, and I filled a coke bottle with disinfect. On my way up the step, my neighbor ran inside and shouted, "Shania what do you have in that bottle?" My mother looked at me concerned. Water began pouring from my eyes. I didn't even answer and I continued up the step. "SHANIA, BRING THAT BOTTLE!" my mother said in a stern voice. I was frightened. I slowly handed her the bottle. As she opened it and smelled her eyes became fury. She looked at me angrily and began to hit me as she quarreled. She even wanted to carry me to the police station.
But I must say, the way my mother reacted, is what partially changed me. To know that I was going to let her down if my neighbor didn't react. To know that I was killing myself all for a foolish boy who cared nothing about me. To know that there was no means of me entering heaven by committing suicide. I prayed to God for forgiveness that evening and I started to read my bible and be the girl I used to be.
On August 19th this year, my teacher died. I lost all faith again. God, why my teacher? Why him? Anybody else but him? I cried. I used that as a reason to be angry at God and I received a drastic punishment. On August 31st ) Independence Day in my country), I fell sick. Two days after I collapsed on the floor. Now what you're going to read in inverted commas is what I was told. I was unconscious. "My baby sister Sheniece, came to my room looking for my mum's charger. As she was about to walk in, she gasped and began crying. She ran to tell mummy that I was dead. Mummy began to quarrel with her for making up such stories and sent her back up. She came into my room crying softly, grabbed the charger and ran back out. She then gave it to mummy and said, 'mummy, Shania is on the flour, you should check her'. Mummy hurried upstairs to find that my sister was being honest. They took me to the nearest hospital where they connected machines to me and placed in cathiter inside of me. They then transferred me to the main hospital and warded me. I was diagnosed with Meningitis or Septicemia- two deadly brain diseases." I had headaches and pain for days at that hospital. One day a lady came to pray for me and asked me what am I doing here. I told her that I have 'meningitis'. She looked at me shocked and said, people with meningitis do not survive but you need to have faith and courage that you will be healed. Like why is this woman telling me that? I didn't care. But then it hit me. Those doctors can't heal me because its a deadly disease. Only God can. I began to pray every night and he granted me a miracle. I was dishcarged two weeks after.
But yet, although I was thankful, I still didn't learn my lesson until yesterday and I am certain I learnt it well. Two weeks ago, I met a girl. Oh how the devil comes in beautiful ways. She is beautiful. She is also a bisexual. I spoke with her and it seemed like I got addicted to her. However, I became possesed for a few days. I couldnt do anything but talk to her and talk to girls. I couldn't help it! I spoke to my friends, told them pray for me because when I tried to pray, I literally became dumb.
Yesterday, was my pastor's son birthday and while going through his wall I realised something. He was a good guy. Someone I can look up too. Someone with good traits. I began smiling to myself and immediately said, "I'm over this". At that very momentum, I felt the burden of my ex boyfriend, my teacher, and the girl lifting of me. I began to cry knowing I had finally gotten bondage breakthrough. I was relieved.
I'm finally back to myself; the joyous and well-spirited person I know; All Thanks to the most High God.
The moral of my testimony is, God will make a way where there seems to be no way. When you are at the edge of a cliff he'll only do two things; teach you hpw to fly or catch you when you fall. Nothing is to great or big for him!"
Thank You
Hi. My name is Shania Moore. I'm 16. I'm from Trinidad, an island In The Caribbean.
God is A Good God and over the past year I have been battling with myself. Last year October 1st, I got into a relationship with a guy. I really liked him because we had been best friends for a year and more. From this relationship, I must say that I understood the meaning of the quote "not all things that glitter is gold". He was a very verbally abusive person. He told me mean stuff daily, made me cry and yet I was the fool to not let go. Eventually two months after, I did. I cried everyday, wanting him back for myself and I did get him back. However, during that one week of our break up, a friend told me, "Shania, when God closes a door means he has a better one in store." At that time, I hated those words because I was "in love". When We made back up, I think it was at the beginning of December, things seemed better at first. On the night of December 31st, I prayed to God to remove anything that is hindering me from a relationship with him in the new year. Coincidently, the year started of badly with us. He got me into sexual activities with him. He even ALMOST got me into the act of copulation itself. But God always work things out before the obvious worst. A Saturday morning I got up and messaged him. I told him, "you're acting as if we're not together". He apparently took that the wrong way and said I broke up with him. That was it! It was over! I didn't know what to do anymore. I came home from school one day after cutting myself, and I filled a coke bottle with disinfect. On my way up the step, my neighbor ran inside and shouted, "Shania what do you have in that bottle?" My mother looked at me concerned. Water began pouring from my eyes. I didn't even answer and I continued up the step. "SHANIA, BRING THAT BOTTLE!" my mother said in a stern voice. I was frightened. I slowly handed her the bottle. As she opened it and smelled her eyes became fury. She looked at me angrily and began to hit me as she quarreled. She even wanted to carry me to the police station.
But I must say, the way my mother reacted, is what partially changed me. To know that I was going to let her down if my neighbor didn't react. To know that I was killing myself all for a foolish boy who cared nothing about me. To know that there was no means of me entering heaven by committing suicide. I prayed to God for forgiveness that evening and I started to read my bible and be the girl I used to be.
On August 19th this year, my teacher died. I lost all faith again. God, why my teacher? Why him? Anybody else but him? I cried. I used that as a reason to be angry at God and I received a drastic punishment. On August 31st ) Independence Day in my country), I fell sick. Two days after I collapsed on the floor. Now what you're going to read in inverted commas is what I was told. I was unconscious. "My baby sister Sheniece, came to my room looking for my mum's charger. As she was about to walk in, she gasped and began crying. She ran to tell mummy that I was dead. Mummy began to quarrel with her for making up such stories and sent her back up. She came into my room crying softly, grabbed the charger and ran back out. She then gave it to mummy and said, 'mummy, Shania is on the flour, you should check her'. Mummy hurried upstairs to find that my sister was being honest. They took me to the nearest hospital where they connected machines to me and placed in cathiter inside of me. They then transferred me to the main hospital and warded me. I was diagnosed with Meningitis or Septicemia- two deadly brain diseases." I had headaches and pain for days at that hospital. One day a lady came to pray for me and asked me what am I doing here. I told her that I have 'meningitis'. She looked at me shocked and said, people with meningitis do not survive but you need to have faith and courage that you will be healed. Like why is this woman telling me that? I didn't care. But then it hit me. Those doctors can't heal me because its a deadly disease. Only God can. I began to pray every night and he granted me a miracle. I was dishcarged two weeks after.
But yet, although I was thankful, I still didn't learn my lesson until yesterday and I am certain I learnt it well. Two weeks ago, I met a girl. Oh how the devil comes in beautiful ways. She is beautiful. She is also a bisexual. I spoke with her and it seemed like I got addicted to her. However, I became possesed for a few days. I couldnt do anything but talk to her and talk to girls. I couldn't help it! I spoke to my friends, told them pray for me because when I tried to pray, I literally became dumb.
Yesterday, was my pastor's son birthday and while going through his wall I realised something. He was a good guy. Someone I can look up too. Someone with good traits. I began smiling to myself and immediately said, "I'm over this". At that very momentum, I felt the burden of my ex boyfriend, my teacher, and the girl lifting of me. I began to cry knowing I had finally gotten bondage breakthrough. I was relieved.
I'm finally back to myself; the joyous and well-spirited person I know; All Thanks to the most High God.
The moral of my testimony is, God will make a way where there seems to be no way. When you are at the edge of a cliff he'll only do two things; teach you hpw to fly or catch you when you fall. Nothing is to great or big for him!"
Thank You
