S
I joined a few days ago because this is where I've been led to. I'll only type this all out once in order to have it as a point of reference.
I am 29. On my 25th birthday I prayed to God for the first time. I was close to suicide at that point, but found a bible on a counter top days prior to my scheduled day of leaving. Strange things began occurring the first couple days. For instance, I would be interrupted periodically by people who would start to speak to me while I was reading, and saw that on many occasions the first 3 or 4 words out of their mouth coincided identically with the text I was reading. I dismissed it as coincidence at first, but then more things began happening.
I would go for walks without a set destination around town and come across similar coincidences. For example, I might pass a group of people who would be in mid conversation and only catch a phrase from their conversation that had a biblical reference or someone using Jesus name in vain, although it served a different meaning to me than them.
It all came to a head on my birthday, October 10th. I still hasn't prayed, but woke up with a feeling of anxiety, like racing heart for no reason. I went for a walk that eventually led me to a greater panic attack. During that walk I found my way across a 10 dollar bill on the sidewalk with the words In God We Trust circled with a marker. A few blocks later my eyes were drawn to a sign that said Watch For Motorcycles while at the same time 3 bikers revved by me down the street. My eyes were drawn to yard signs and bumper stickers with biblical insignia and quotes, and it felt like I was not in control of anything, not even where my own eyes looked. With a racing heart I stared at my shoes and half ran back to my empty apartment, and when I got upstairs the television was on a religious woman on a program. I walked in at the exact moment she was ending the show with the words, remember to pray".
I never prayed before and was at a loss for words or how to start. The only thing I eventually said after I head my head down was, " God is this really happening?" When I looked up I saw 3 circular orbs that were about 2 feet in front of me. They were pulsating, electrified metallic orbs is the best I can come to describe them, and all at once the orbs physically manifested into 3 green dragonflies. They were so real that I could hear their wings buzzing. Two of them flew around each other and the third was off to the left. After a few seconds, they simply dematerialized back into orbs and then vanished completely. The first thing I did was breathe because I had forgotten to do so while I was staring, and then I cried.
It wasn't until the shock wore off that I started to realize other facts unavailable to me at the time. Two days prior I had been outside my parents house when a swarm of dragonflies invaded our yard. They were everywhere and yet not in anyone else's yard. I remember telling my mom yo come out and look because it was so odd. The second fact was one of my favorite songs of all time prior to this called "Dragonfly" by Shamans Harvest.
Well, it didn't take long before people started thinking me insane. I was still in a state of awe that I didn't take the time to consider how my story would sound to others. Of course they would think me crazy or under the influence of drugs. In all honesty, that was the first week I hadn't touched marijuana in a long time. I was never cleaner that that week since grade school.
It wasn't long before I started to doubt my own sanity. I locked myself up in a room pretty much and started reading, praying, trying to find answers. Eventually I accepted that it was a fact that my mind had simply created the dragonflues as something my unconscious mind wanted to see. I had every intention of going to a mental hospital after a few months of mental torture. At that point I had severed most ties with every person I had called a friend and my parents were also pretty concerned about my habits of sitting in my room reading and sleeping with little else.
It was a Sunday when god intervened and put the doubt's to rest for me. The day previous I had been reading. On several occasions my mind was be interrupted by the repetition of a name in my mind. The name was Jacobi. I never knew a Jacobi and never heard the name before, and yet my mind kept repeating it on several occasions to the point of distraction . the following day I was reading again and this time the name started again, but did not stop. Over and over and I couldn't understand a thing my ryes were reading. Finally I got up and quit my room. I relocated to the back porch and decided to turn on the TV after several weeks without it. As soon ad I pressed the power button a football play was underway. No channel changing, immediate and at the very moment I pressed ON. Joe flacco threw some 80 yard touchdown pass to Jacobi Jones. I laughed a little out of hysteria, not really humor. I couldn't tell if I was still living in reality or not. The help came the following morning.
I turned on ESPN to see the caption Jacobi "Dragonfly" Jones. They didn't elaborate on the dragonfly part, so I turned on the PC and started digging. As it turned out, Jacobi"s nickname since high school was dragonfly. Minutes later my mom came up and said that she watched dancing with the stars and really liked that season because they had a football player on it. I never watched the show but without hesitation I said, "I think its Jacobi Jones" . And that was exactly who it was. At that point I knee God was telling me directly I wasn't insane and it wasn't my mind playing tricks.
Since that day I fit back into a normal lifestyle. I became a truck driver and have been doing it for the past 4 years. I know there is still a debt to be paid to God, and there must be a reason why God revealed that existence to me because surely there have been a plethora of people more deserving of that confirmation than me. I pray routinely and have been able to differentiate the lines between NY own imagination and the holy spirit but not without trial and error. I read a lot, buy a lot of books because I believe that's something the spirit has wanted me to do. I don't have a house or a car...those things have not seemed to resonate with any internal desire of my own. I have simply worked and saved, but only recently I've begun to recognize a sense of urgency from the spirit. Before, it routinely said to me for 4 years straight to stay the course, work, save, share when the opportunity presents itself (and there is no shortage of panhandlers at truck stops). But recently its been saying something else that has me on edge...its telling me prepare.
I don't like doomsday talk. I used to bash the preppers out there stocking up on weapons and ammunition. Though I have been ready to meet my end evenever it should happen, I've not considered the possibility that maybe god might want me to prepare things now in the event of someone else's time of need. So last week I bought a one years supply of food good for 25 shelf years. I know how it sounds to others...like I'm crazy, but thats already been soil turned over for me. I will be continuing to purchase things from here on out until directed otherwise.
I'm 29 now and usually work for about 7 weeks at a time. If anyone should wish to speak with me or discuss anything feel free to email me at matthewstone358 @yahoo.com it might be slow for me to reply...a lot of driving and little down time.
On one final note...I don't go to church or have a religioua affiliation but technically I would call myself a christian. I say this because I believe Jesus Christ is the only way, and through all the reading I've done on the topic, whether the bible or independent works, the only name that evokes fear from any and all evil spirits is Jesus christ, and it was the new testament that I was led to read before first praying. So there is no doubt or question as to that...as for all other questions, I've settled on the facts that I don't know the answers to most, and that simplifying it to nothing more than Jesus Christ is the answer has brought me peace and happiness without curiosity of knowing anymore.
Matthew Stone 1-29-16
I am 29. On my 25th birthday I prayed to God for the first time. I was close to suicide at that point, but found a bible on a counter top days prior to my scheduled day of leaving. Strange things began occurring the first couple days. For instance, I would be interrupted periodically by people who would start to speak to me while I was reading, and saw that on many occasions the first 3 or 4 words out of their mouth coincided identically with the text I was reading. I dismissed it as coincidence at first, but then more things began happening.
I would go for walks without a set destination around town and come across similar coincidences. For example, I might pass a group of people who would be in mid conversation and only catch a phrase from their conversation that had a biblical reference or someone using Jesus name in vain, although it served a different meaning to me than them.
It all came to a head on my birthday, October 10th. I still hasn't prayed, but woke up with a feeling of anxiety, like racing heart for no reason. I went for a walk that eventually led me to a greater panic attack. During that walk I found my way across a 10 dollar bill on the sidewalk with the words In God We Trust circled with a marker. A few blocks later my eyes were drawn to a sign that said Watch For Motorcycles while at the same time 3 bikers revved by me down the street. My eyes were drawn to yard signs and bumper stickers with biblical insignia and quotes, and it felt like I was not in control of anything, not even where my own eyes looked. With a racing heart I stared at my shoes and half ran back to my empty apartment, and when I got upstairs the television was on a religious woman on a program. I walked in at the exact moment she was ending the show with the words, remember to pray".
I never prayed before and was at a loss for words or how to start. The only thing I eventually said after I head my head down was, " God is this really happening?" When I looked up I saw 3 circular orbs that were about 2 feet in front of me. They were pulsating, electrified metallic orbs is the best I can come to describe them, and all at once the orbs physically manifested into 3 green dragonflies. They were so real that I could hear their wings buzzing. Two of them flew around each other and the third was off to the left. After a few seconds, they simply dematerialized back into orbs and then vanished completely. The first thing I did was breathe because I had forgotten to do so while I was staring, and then I cried.
It wasn't until the shock wore off that I started to realize other facts unavailable to me at the time. Two days prior I had been outside my parents house when a swarm of dragonflies invaded our yard. They were everywhere and yet not in anyone else's yard. I remember telling my mom yo come out and look because it was so odd. The second fact was one of my favorite songs of all time prior to this called "Dragonfly" by Shamans Harvest.
Well, it didn't take long before people started thinking me insane. I was still in a state of awe that I didn't take the time to consider how my story would sound to others. Of course they would think me crazy or under the influence of drugs. In all honesty, that was the first week I hadn't touched marijuana in a long time. I was never cleaner that that week since grade school.
It wasn't long before I started to doubt my own sanity. I locked myself up in a room pretty much and started reading, praying, trying to find answers. Eventually I accepted that it was a fact that my mind had simply created the dragonflues as something my unconscious mind wanted to see. I had every intention of going to a mental hospital after a few months of mental torture. At that point I had severed most ties with every person I had called a friend and my parents were also pretty concerned about my habits of sitting in my room reading and sleeping with little else.
It was a Sunday when god intervened and put the doubt's to rest for me. The day previous I had been reading. On several occasions my mind was be interrupted by the repetition of a name in my mind. The name was Jacobi. I never knew a Jacobi and never heard the name before, and yet my mind kept repeating it on several occasions to the point of distraction . the following day I was reading again and this time the name started again, but did not stop. Over and over and I couldn't understand a thing my ryes were reading. Finally I got up and quit my room. I relocated to the back porch and decided to turn on the TV after several weeks without it. As soon ad I pressed the power button a football play was underway. No channel changing, immediate and at the very moment I pressed ON. Joe flacco threw some 80 yard touchdown pass to Jacobi Jones. I laughed a little out of hysteria, not really humor. I couldn't tell if I was still living in reality or not. The help came the following morning.
I turned on ESPN to see the caption Jacobi "Dragonfly" Jones. They didn't elaborate on the dragonfly part, so I turned on the PC and started digging. As it turned out, Jacobi"s nickname since high school was dragonfly. Minutes later my mom came up and said that she watched dancing with the stars and really liked that season because they had a football player on it. I never watched the show but without hesitation I said, "I think its Jacobi Jones" . And that was exactly who it was. At that point I knee God was telling me directly I wasn't insane and it wasn't my mind playing tricks.
Since that day I fit back into a normal lifestyle. I became a truck driver and have been doing it for the past 4 years. I know there is still a debt to be paid to God, and there must be a reason why God revealed that existence to me because surely there have been a plethora of people more deserving of that confirmation than me. I pray routinely and have been able to differentiate the lines between NY own imagination and the holy spirit but not without trial and error. I read a lot, buy a lot of books because I believe that's something the spirit has wanted me to do. I don't have a house or a car...those things have not seemed to resonate with any internal desire of my own. I have simply worked and saved, but only recently I've begun to recognize a sense of urgency from the spirit. Before, it routinely said to me for 4 years straight to stay the course, work, save, share when the opportunity presents itself (and there is no shortage of panhandlers at truck stops). But recently its been saying something else that has me on edge...its telling me prepare.
I don't like doomsday talk. I used to bash the preppers out there stocking up on weapons and ammunition. Though I have been ready to meet my end evenever it should happen, I've not considered the possibility that maybe god might want me to prepare things now in the event of someone else's time of need. So last week I bought a one years supply of food good for 25 shelf years. I know how it sounds to others...like I'm crazy, but thats already been soil turned over for me. I will be continuing to purchase things from here on out until directed otherwise.
I'm 29 now and usually work for about 7 weeks at a time. If anyone should wish to speak with me or discuss anything feel free to email me at matthewstone358 @yahoo.com it might be slow for me to reply...a lot of driving and little down time.
On one final note...I don't go to church or have a religioua affiliation but technically I would call myself a christian. I say this because I believe Jesus Christ is the only way, and through all the reading I've done on the topic, whether the bible or independent works, the only name that evokes fear from any and all evil spirits is Jesus christ, and it was the new testament that I was led to read before first praying. So there is no doubt or question as to that...as for all other questions, I've settled on the facts that I don't know the answers to most, and that simplifying it to nothing more than Jesus Christ is the answer has brought me peace and happiness without curiosity of knowing anymore.
Matthew Stone 1-29-16
