Confession. I am on probation for molesting my younger sister. My addiction to animated porn, which has literally no boundaries but instead is very creative in finding the stranger and more forbidden. There of course is what you know. Sex, orgies, incest, bestiality, child, bondage, but there is more. Tentacle, furries (humanoid animals with fur bodies) torn apart bodies, blasphemous spiritual sex stories. And my boundaries were taken down in desperation to fulfill my lustful desire. They say that a sure sign you have a succubus (sex demon) is when you close your eyes and all you see is sex. That was me.
As despicable as my situation was after a long story of finally taking God seriously, growing spiritually and still struggling with lust. Being on sex offender probation and still struggling with the desire to do things I ought not do, a strange rabbit hole journey for truth and God and higher level placement and knowledge I found a way of surrender that took me deeper than ever before. Do all as unto the Lord. Colossians 3:23. Not by the verse but of it. And I received revelation into one of mans most difficult temptations to overcome.
By this new way of surrender I learned that everything can be used to serve God, and by that that everything was created to serve God, and by that, that all sin is is that which does not serve God. And by that, that lust is actually the distorted version of the love of God we naturally have in us. It's that love turned towards our own pleasure. But if we were to give that lust energy to God, and literally turn to lust for God than it would become purified and revert back into its original state, which is pure divine love, for God reflects all things in their truest form. Then it is lust no more. All sin is is a misuse of energy. All energy is neutral. The use of it is positive or negative. We know there is righteous anger, for justice sake. Another example. So I decided to become celibate for life.
Now I experience love and intimacy with God in very sensual and romantic, though not sexual ways. And have learned why Paul said it is well for a man not to touch a woman. For there is a lower physical level and a higher spiritual level. Sexual energy in its lowest form is physical. Though this world is only a step up from hell, so it makes sense that such a worldly attachment would be necessary just for survival sake, which is another worldly attachment. But at its highest form, sexual energy is creative power. Just ponder how all of creation is born. And how sex leads to birth. But without physical sex God gave birth to creation, and that creative power can be harnessed if we detach from the physical use of sexual energy and transform it into creative energy. Now there is a way of redemption for this world where even physical practices can be spiritualized, but it takes discipline and training to make sex an expression of its spiritual essence. You must detach from the pleasure of it, where most see the blessing. Yet the bible calls us to detach from the material world. From physical pleasure. You must move it and not be moved by it. Then God will move through it and creative power will work through you. Now that is not to say that it is forbidden to enjoy. But to do for the sake of enjoyment feeds attachment. Letting it be what it is you can see it come and go. You don't chase it nor avoid it. If you are spiritually mature your intuition will lead to spontaneous moments sexual interplay that are dedicated to the Lord rather than the pleasure of the body, which is not even who and what you are. Then you will always have a pure reason to perform this act of union.
As despicable as my situation was after a long story of finally taking God seriously, growing spiritually and still struggling with lust. Being on sex offender probation and still struggling with the desire to do things I ought not do, a strange rabbit hole journey for truth and God and higher level placement and knowledge I found a way of surrender that took me deeper than ever before. Do all as unto the Lord. Colossians 3:23. Not by the verse but of it. And I received revelation into one of mans most difficult temptations to overcome.
By this new way of surrender I learned that everything can be used to serve God, and by that that everything was created to serve God, and by that, that all sin is is that which does not serve God. And by that, that lust is actually the distorted version of the love of God we naturally have in us. It's that love turned towards our own pleasure. But if we were to give that lust energy to God, and literally turn to lust for God than it would become purified and revert back into its original state, which is pure divine love, for God reflects all things in their truest form. Then it is lust no more. All sin is is a misuse of energy. All energy is neutral. The use of it is positive or negative. We know there is righteous anger, for justice sake. Another example. So I decided to become celibate for life.
Now I experience love and intimacy with God in very sensual and romantic, though not sexual ways. And have learned why Paul said it is well for a man not to touch a woman. For there is a lower physical level and a higher spiritual level. Sexual energy in its lowest form is physical. Though this world is only a step up from hell, so it makes sense that such a worldly attachment would be necessary just for survival sake, which is another worldly attachment. But at its highest form, sexual energy is creative power. Just ponder how all of creation is born. And how sex leads to birth. But without physical sex God gave birth to creation, and that creative power can be harnessed if we detach from the physical use of sexual energy and transform it into creative energy. Now there is a way of redemption for this world where even physical practices can be spiritualized, but it takes discipline and training to make sex an expression of its spiritual essence. You must detach from the pleasure of it, where most see the blessing. Yet the bible calls us to detach from the material world. From physical pleasure. You must move it and not be moved by it. Then God will move through it and creative power will work through you. Now that is not to say that it is forbidden to enjoy. But to do for the sake of enjoyment feeds attachment. Letting it be what it is you can see it come and go. You don't chase it nor avoid it. If you are spiritually mature your intuition will lead to spontaneous moments sexual interplay that are dedicated to the Lord rather than the pleasure of the body, which is not even who and what you are. Then you will always have a pure reason to perform this act of union.