Jesus made ME ONE with HIM and the FATHER

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HeavenwithinYOU

Guest
#1
[FONT=&quot] Although not knowing you I believe that we are all one, all people are connected in one way or another, even our friends were strangers at one time in our lives and you never know what you can learn from another person, feel free to write back with any subject you wish, this is not spam. I am writing to engage people in a serious but loving conversation. But first you need to hear my story to know about me, my name is Alex and I know time is precious and for those that give me their time there is nothing greater one can do for another than just that. Much love to all the people out there in this crazy day and age. Life is an endless pit of wants and needs we try to fill with money, toys, music and movies, each other. Success, to be thought of by others as ‘wise’ or successful, to be a winner, a rebel, to be different and unique, trying to establish our own identity that is different from the status quo, individuality, self seeking and selfish all the way through, even in our want to help others we do it usually for self satisfaction and not for the actual love for others. Not all, but most, fall into this. 100 percent, keep reading then refute if you want but please be nice, thank you.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] My story begins in 1999 when I partied a lot, drinking, smoking, etc and could not have fun without it. From clubs to hangouts with friends it seemed that life was getting really hectic with fun, there was a lot of it to be had. I also liked a girl named Catharine for a long time, a girl I knew but we never had a chance to date due to circumstances. I was never a player in terms of girls, but I went on a spree with a few loose girls jumping from one to the other to the other and at the end of that spree I got a call from a friend saying Catherine wants you to come over and make out, I think she wants to be with you now. So I went to his house and as soon as I got close to her I had a thought rush through me I had no control over: Use her and move on. I imagined having sex with her a few times and disposing of her, the girl I dreamed about for years finally at my fingertips wanting me to be her man and all I wanted to do was use and dump her? I didn't want to feel this but I did and couldn’t shake it. I was desensitized because of the girls I had sex with that I didn’t love? I thought I could love but I guess no more purity left huh? This freaked me out a bit so I left and then started thinking about things for a short while and realized I’m not the 'good guy' I once was. My mind was turned over to perversion and I couldn't fix it. I had no answer. I tried being Holy for a few weeks to not gratify myself sexually, to not smoke, drink and to be still, but I had no power over my own self, how pathetic, ey? I looked up one night asking God for a new soul, almost jokingly but meaning it, saying: Make me pure again God, the way I used to be, something is wrong with me. Something was always wrong I guess from the start? Was I born messed up? Did sinning do this? I don’t even think sin is real, is pleasure sin? I am so confused about myself right about now God. I started to cry and thought, “Why could I just not simply BE. And BE happy like everyone else seems to be? What am I a freak or what?” So God did nothing for the few weeks that I spoke, apologizing a lot on my walks alone at night feeling sorry all the time from that point on, with tears hating what I was, hating life. So I decided to read the Gospel to see if maybe God would come through if I did that.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] I kept asking Jesus to give me a new self, over and over again that’s all I asked for a new self. As soon as I read Luke 11:13 which said ‘If you who are evil know how to give good gifts to your kids how much more will God give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!” The “!” mark caught my eye and I thought maybe I don’t have the Holy Spirit even though I believe in Jesus? Could this be? So I read and asked for the Holy Spirit, looking up saying, “God, I’m not going to go to church like this. In fact I am not going to go all my life hoping that when I die I go to heaven. I hear that Jesus came to undo the devils works and last I checked his first work was removing Eden from man. And since Jesus came to undo it all and said, "It is finished." -- That means that I can have you God be as real to me as you were to Adam, right? Then that’s what I want. The Holy Spirit and you personally revealed as Adam had, or, kill me and take me to heaven now because I can’t live like this anymore, it’s horrible to be human God, to want! I hate it! Help me please.” Now I had my mind made up to read the Gospel at least once maybe twice before I quite, refraining from any and all fun. Fun became my enemy for some reason. I saw it as an excuse for my brain to get away from the truth, that without it I would be miserable. This got me upset. So I pushed on. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] These are the things I asked for while reading for 26 days, alone, waking up without a change I would keep pushing and asking more louder even to the point where the last three days I would go to a mountain and scream as loud as I could thinking, “Let the angels, if they’re there, see me and go tell God and let them see how much I hate this human condition prison I am in.” This pumped me up. Well, on day 27 right before hitting the Book of Revelations I woke up with what I can only describe as “feeling heaven within me” and a new self. I saw Jesus in my dream that first night, He was really tall wearing a white robe walking down my street releasing seven starts that lit up my entire street, following Him was a parade of sorts all heading to my apartment where my mom and I lived. I had a bursting energy in my gut, what seemed to be the Living Water within me as Jesus said would from the belly per John 7:37. It's true, ALL of it. And unless a person asks God for a new self to be reborn Holy to know and be one with Him, HE will ignore all else and not come through because that's the gift. He will keep people safe who read His word and don’t do this, for the most part taking care of all their needs because He loves them, but forget God communicating with that person in the literal sense. That’s why Jesus said to ask for nothing except two things. Seek the kingdom of heaven (later saying heaven is within YOU! And seek my righteousness not your own: The Holy Spirit. Romans 10:3 teaches that most do not know the righteousness that comes from God because they seek to establish their own. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] And unless one reads for that reason, knowing they are evil and are powerless, they will miss out on the gift of Christ revealed inside them literally. So I say to all to read and ask for these in secret and finish the 200 pages that IS the Gospel, only asking God for this in Jesus name. Then come back and tell me how GOOD God is because that's the ONLY outcome that can prevail if you do: Christ revealed within you. And if a person doesn’t try they will never know and be sorry for it later because God will show them after they die what they missed out on and what life could have been like with Him inside their Spirit literally making them into His image.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] There is a REASON why Jesus said DO not pray in the synagogues where others can see you, but ALONE in your room ask for Father and He will reward you. Later adding only ask for the Kingdom to come upon you and only ask for the Holy Spirit … that all else God knows before you ask Him. Don’t try to establish your righteousness through your deeds, we will be rewarded for deeds, but unless we stop all (REPENT) and wait for ‘power from on high to clothe us’ which was his commandment, we are not really in Christ.
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