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As the title says this isn't really a testimony, it's more about a struggle/temptation in my life, that to this day is still in my thoughts.
The thing that I struggled with in my life was cross dressing (so it’s about my life dealing with it & also covers some facts that I’ve learnt) and as I said it can still be a that is in my mind even though now having 20 plus years I have stopped doing.
Though some people throughout this world may think this cross dressing is an innocent thing, from experience I know that it isn’t. Yes it might start of as something that mostly men could be curious about at any age, but mostly while at a younger age, but the problem is it can led from being innocent to an sexual addiction, especially if it’s something that you grew up with.
For me cross dressing did begin as an innocent thing, just wanting to try on/wear clothes that were my mum’s, but through the years it began more of a sexual pleasure & also a need.
This need/desire/interest/urge (whatever you want to or may call it) started for me when I was 11. One day I noticed an old dress laying on top of something’s on 1 side of my mum’s bedroom & for whatever reason (to this day I still don’t know & I tried to figure it out) I wanted to try it on. I do remember getting the chance to try it on (I think it was doing a dress up thing at home) & after awhile I remember wanting to try on a dress that my mum wore at the time & it was from that moment the desire/urge/need/interest was strong in me.
After realising recently that this temptation to cross dress, I realised why the constant thoughts & taking things of my mum’s came from. Though I didn’t know much better, but the feelings I felt when I got the chance to dress up, I know that I knew better when I was growing up especially when I was in my twenties.
Though I could easily blame the Devil/Satan for tempting me with this, I know that since I did become a Christian about 2 years after I started cross dressing & especially after a bad situation happened evolving the whole situation, it didn’t change my outlook to it until recently.
I don’t if I had any background situations in my life that made be chose to cross dress as long as I did. Maybe it had to deal with being in single parent home after my father left my mum, maybe it has to deal with not ever having a girlfriend, but then again while it was in my life not ever having a girlfriend was God’s plan for my life (but I’m only guessing that 1), whatever the reason was I’m not going to play the blame game anymore I’m just going to grow from it instead.
__________________________
Now the reason why I decided to stop cross dressing, was mainly thanks to God. I realised that if I wanted to be a stronger person for God that I needed to stop cross dressing & that I had to stop relying just on myself to deal with it (because I tried that before).
I don’t know if there will be any men that currently cross dress will be reading this or not, but I need to mention this.
Among cross dressers there is a prevailing theme that cross dressing is a reflection of “who they are.” Some even believe that they were born with a female soul trapped in a male body. But while there are those that believe that, I believe that God didn’t make a mistake & though cross dressing as come a part of who I once was & others still do, we weren’t born that way. That statement can also be for those that are homosexual.
I now believe that cross dressing is sinful, those that cross-dress weren’t born as females, but as males so what we do must come from Satan/the Devil. Satan does this so we can move further away from God and the love that God actually as for all of us within this world.
Like many things of this world Satan/the Devil likes to deceive us by thinking that we actually need that thing (whatever it is) in our lives, but the truth is that actually if we try to live without it we find out that we don’t need it (I know this from experience). For those of us that are Christians throughout this world we know that we can rely on God to help, support & love us through everything that we battle.
I do know that for me, cross-dressing was hard to stop doing. I once wished that I stop after I told a Christian female friend (at the time) about it & she basically told me that it was something that I should stop doing & when I look at it now (I guess) that she was trying to help me by talking to 1 of my best Christian friends about it thinking that he knew & he eventually talked to me about it. Through this whole situation I lost one of the best things that I was involved with within my church. After that I did try to stop, but the thoughts of cross dressing was continuously in head that I ended up starting again.
Stopping cross dressing is not an easy thing to do, I know from experience. I know now that I don’t want to go back into that habit.
If there’s anything that I have learnt from this is that if we get sick of something that is in our lives we should never raise the white flag on it has it’s what Satan wants from us. Also I have learnt that we especially Christian’s need to be careful who we seek help through, especially if they say things like, you can’t overcome it or (in my case) if you feel comfortable about it then there’s no harm with it.
To all Christians that read this, I don’t know if this is any help to any of you, but you all need to realise that you can encourage family & friends through their battles if you are willing to try, even if that is through prayer. Yes it be hard work at times (especially if you have never had to deal with it), but sometimes they just need someone to talk to about their struggles. I totally benefit from that, I have 2 wonderful close friends that I regularly see & they always encourage me with everything that I go through, especially with the struggles that I can still have with cross dressing
As I continually walk with God I know that he is constantly there for me & I also know that if I can’t find a solution to the thoughts that I have the Christian friends that know about it that I can txt or e-mail at anytime.
The thing that I struggled with in my life was cross dressing (so it’s about my life dealing with it & also covers some facts that I’ve learnt) and as I said it can still be a that is in my mind even though now having 20 plus years I have stopped doing.
Though some people throughout this world may think this cross dressing is an innocent thing, from experience I know that it isn’t. Yes it might start of as something that mostly men could be curious about at any age, but mostly while at a younger age, but the problem is it can led from being innocent to an sexual addiction, especially if it’s something that you grew up with.
For me cross dressing did begin as an innocent thing, just wanting to try on/wear clothes that were my mum’s, but through the years it began more of a sexual pleasure & also a need.
This need/desire/interest/urge (whatever you want to or may call it) started for me when I was 11. One day I noticed an old dress laying on top of something’s on 1 side of my mum’s bedroom & for whatever reason (to this day I still don’t know & I tried to figure it out) I wanted to try it on. I do remember getting the chance to try it on (I think it was doing a dress up thing at home) & after awhile I remember wanting to try on a dress that my mum wore at the time & it was from that moment the desire/urge/need/interest was strong in me.
After realising recently that this temptation to cross dress, I realised why the constant thoughts & taking things of my mum’s came from. Though I didn’t know much better, but the feelings I felt when I got the chance to dress up, I know that I knew better when I was growing up especially when I was in my twenties.
Though I could easily blame the Devil/Satan for tempting me with this, I know that since I did become a Christian about 2 years after I started cross dressing & especially after a bad situation happened evolving the whole situation, it didn’t change my outlook to it until recently.
I don’t if I had any background situations in my life that made be chose to cross dress as long as I did. Maybe it had to deal with being in single parent home after my father left my mum, maybe it has to deal with not ever having a girlfriend, but then again while it was in my life not ever having a girlfriend was God’s plan for my life (but I’m only guessing that 1), whatever the reason was I’m not going to play the blame game anymore I’m just going to grow from it instead.
__________________________
Now the reason why I decided to stop cross dressing, was mainly thanks to God. I realised that if I wanted to be a stronger person for God that I needed to stop cross dressing & that I had to stop relying just on myself to deal with it (because I tried that before).
I don’t know if there will be any men that currently cross dress will be reading this or not, but I need to mention this.
Among cross dressers there is a prevailing theme that cross dressing is a reflection of “who they are.” Some even believe that they were born with a female soul trapped in a male body. But while there are those that believe that, I believe that God didn’t make a mistake & though cross dressing as come a part of who I once was & others still do, we weren’t born that way. That statement can also be for those that are homosexual.
I now believe that cross dressing is sinful, those that cross-dress weren’t born as females, but as males so what we do must come from Satan/the Devil. Satan does this so we can move further away from God and the love that God actually as for all of us within this world.
Like many things of this world Satan/the Devil likes to deceive us by thinking that we actually need that thing (whatever it is) in our lives, but the truth is that actually if we try to live without it we find out that we don’t need it (I know this from experience). For those of us that are Christians throughout this world we know that we can rely on God to help, support & love us through everything that we battle.
I do know that for me, cross-dressing was hard to stop doing. I once wished that I stop after I told a Christian female friend (at the time) about it & she basically told me that it was something that I should stop doing & when I look at it now (I guess) that she was trying to help me by talking to 1 of my best Christian friends about it thinking that he knew & he eventually talked to me about it. Through this whole situation I lost one of the best things that I was involved with within my church. After that I did try to stop, but the thoughts of cross dressing was continuously in head that I ended up starting again.
Stopping cross dressing is not an easy thing to do, I know from experience. I know now that I don’t want to go back into that habit.
If there’s anything that I have learnt from this is that if we get sick of something that is in our lives we should never raise the white flag on it has it’s what Satan wants from us. Also I have learnt that we especially Christian’s need to be careful who we seek help through, especially if they say things like, you can’t overcome it or (in my case) if you feel comfortable about it then there’s no harm with it.
To all Christians that read this, I don’t know if this is any help to any of you, but you all need to realise that you can encourage family & friends through their battles if you are willing to try, even if that is through prayer. Yes it be hard work at times (especially if you have never had to deal with it), but sometimes they just need someone to talk to about their struggles. I totally benefit from that, I have 2 wonderful close friends that I regularly see & they always encourage me with everything that I go through, especially with the struggles that I can still have with cross dressing
As I continually walk with God I know that he is constantly there for me & I also know that if I can’t find a solution to the thoughts that I have the Christian friends that know about it that I can txt or e-mail at anytime.
