A Foreigner visiting India

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agirlandherguitar

Guest
#1
#1
Hello!

I will be a Foreigner visiting India this November & December for three weeks. My friend fell in love with a wonderful man from Kolkata and they are getting married!

I'm wondering if any of you could give me some advice when I'm out there as to what to watch out for and what to expect. This can be a totally open discussion. Food, drinks, hotels, bathrooms, customs, clothes etc.

One thing I'm wondering about first of all is how a Christian would fare visiting temples and such. I imagine they wouldn't force me to do anything just as most churches here wouldn't force an Indian with a different faith here to worship like we do. I'm very respectful with other religions and I am very intrigued with Hinduism, especially the art, but some Christians may frown on that saying that I shouldn't bring false idols into my home even if it's just for aesthetic reasons. My friend brought a Ganesh statue home and some of my friends didn't like that. So I guess what I'm asking is how can I balance my faith while being immersed in a culture with a very strong religion and trying not to offend anybody if I don't feel comfortable partaking in a certain ritual. I'm not sure what kind of rituals they do during weddings but sometimes they pray to their gods. If I don't bow my head to their gods would I be offending them?

Thanks!
 
sanglina

sanglina

Senior Member
#2
Jul 28, 2012
857
4
0
#2
agirlandherguitar said:
Hello!

I will be a Foreigner visiting India this November & December for three weeks. My friend fell in love with a wonderful man from Kolkata and they are getting married!

I'm wondering if any of you could give me some advice when I'm out there as to what to watch out for and what to expect. This can be a totally open discussion. Food, drinks, hotels, bathrooms, customs, clothes etc.

One thing I'm wondering about first of all is how a Christian would fare visiting temples and such. I imagine they wouldn't force me to do anything just as most churches here wouldn't force an Indian with a different faith here to worship like we do. I'm very respectful with other religions and I am very intrigued with Hinduism, especially the art, but some Christians may frown on that saying that I shouldn't bring false idols into my home even if it's just for aesthetic reasons. My friend brought a Ganesh statue home and some of my friends didn't like that. So I guess what I'm asking is how can I balance my faith while being immersed in a culture with a very strong religion and trying not to offend anybody if I don't feel comfortable partaking in a certain ritual. I'm not sure what kind of rituals they do during weddings but sometimes they pray to their gods. If I don't bow my head to their gods would I be offending them?

Thanks!
Click to expand...
I cannot give you details about how the whole hindu wedding ritual works as I don't know about them myself. But one thing I can tell you for sure is that you'll not be forced to worship or bow to any gods during the wedding. The ritual for the wedding will be carried out for the couple only and there's no need to panic about it. I have seen some strong american christians (visitors in my church) attending hindu marriages while here in India and I have not heard any complains about it aka forced to worship or bow heads to their god sort of thing.

Regarding foods, its upto you i.e. whether to go for Indian or non-Indian (assuming that you stay in a hotel), people will not make a big issue out of it. I am sure there would be many good restaurants that would suit your palate. However, in the wedding you might be treated with varieties of Indian foods (considered spicy for foreigners) and sweets. There's one thing you need to know about it though. People (one after another) will keep asking you to eat more and more foods because that's how they show their hospitality. Do not take offense to such offer or feel bad to decline it politely and repeatedly if you dont feel like it (or maybe decline after taking a little bite). The same person may ask you to eat more a couple of times or even forcefully put food in your plate even after you decline it (unless they are specifically directed not to) because that's how they look after their guest and not to do so would be considered rude and unwelcoming.

About dress, you can wear any western dress like pant and shirt or skirt so long as it doesnot reveal too much of skin (i.e low neckline, etc). If the wedding is in the heart of kolkatta, I guess there should not be any problem with how you dress but if you want to, then you can always go shopping for some Indian dress to wear in the wedding and while being a guest here in India (I have lived in mainstream Indian city for several years but I don't own any full Indian dress myself and how I am dressed which is mostly western has never been a problem so far). Only when I go to a remote Indian places for some study purposes that I tend to wear kurta (Indian) instead of shirt/t-shirt with jeans.

Also, with respect to temple visiting, I have myself done that out of compulsion (study purpose) but apart from the priest offering you parshad in the form of eatables or sweets (you can accept it and throw it away later on when they are not looking), I dont think anybody will forced you to worship. So, it should be quite safe visiting temples just to look around. Regarding taking the statue of ganesh or other Hindu gods, I personally would not advised you to accept any of such statues.

I hope this bits helps. Wish you the best for your visit in December :).
 
Praus

Praus

Banned
#3
Dec 21, 2012
2,982
40
0
#3
Sounds like fun! I've been to India twice including a Hindu engagement party and wedding in Rajasthan so I'll tell what I know.

For dress, cover your legs to the ankles, definitely no cleavage. You can show the deltoid muscle of your shoulder but not you whole shoulder. Clothes are really cheap in India. The more Indian clothes you wear and the less Western clothes, the better.

Eat with your right hand only, it's preferable to not use silverware but acceptable for Westerners. As much as possible don't use your left hand for anything except bathroom as it's dirty in Indian culture.

Don't drink any water unless bottled. If you're in the village you can boil it for 10 minutes. If you're not in an expensive hotel the shower will be a faucet, a bucket, and a little pitcher so you take a bucket shower. When you do this don't let any water get in your mouth or up your nostrils. I wash my head last when I take a shower in the 3rd world, it's easier.

The Indian govt. doesn't mess around when it comes to respecting ALL religions, several states in India banned the film Last Temptation of Christ because it's offensive to Christians. I don't think you'll have any problems there. There's still tension between Hindus and Muslims in some places, just like the intolerance in any other country, physically avoiding those kind of situations is best.

Indian weddings are great fun. The groom rides a horse around the neighborhood and the wedding party follows him around. People have stunt guns which shoot blanks so it's really noisy. Sometimes they have fireworks.

The wedding will probably happen in two rooms for a while, all the men in one room and all the women in another. You'll probably be asked to dance repeatedly from members of the same sex. After a couple hours of partying everyone gets together in the room for the wedding ceremony. I don't remember anything resembling religion at the wedding or at the engagement party. Just food, hidden alcohol, and dancing like Bollywood movie.

When you go outside go with an Indian friend so you can completely avoid harassment from all the street peddlers. And Kolkata is one of the largest slums on the planet, you're going to see overcrowding that you can't even imagine until you get there. The streets will feature cows, pigs and dogs just wandering around looking for food. The cows are sacred and the pigs and dogs are filthy so nobody touches them. It'll be a learning experience, that's for sure.

Visiting the Hindu temple? You don't have to bow down, there will be a few hours a day that you can go view the the deities (idols). It's called 'darshan' which means vision. You visit the temple and see the deity AND the deity sees you. I think that's already worship at some level, so tread carefully on that path.
 
G

gunday

Guest
#4
#4
Well, as part of the marriage ceremony you don't need to bow to any idol or anything. Almost all Indian weddings have guests from different religious backgrounds and no one is required to do anything that violates their religious laws. You can simply follow the crowd in doing certain things. Sometimes, they bring the mangalsutra (which will be tied to bride by the groom) and everyone lays their hand on it, like you're blessing it. At the end of the ceremony, the crowd will shower them with rice grains. Some of these practices happen in some Indian christian weddings as well.

While eating, use your right hand. If you're entering a temple, make sure that you leave your footwear at the entrance. Try to wear something modest like salwar kameez, as it is a safe choice among other options, especially in places like temples.


Lastly, people will respect you and understand that you are a foreigner who is not fully aware of things here. If you do something wrong, it will most likely put a smile on their face rather than offending anyone :)

I'm sure you'll find a good friend in the crowd who will be with you let you know if something is wrong. I hope you will have a good time here :)
 
S

SHINY707

Guest
#5
#5
IN CASE YOU VISIT THE TEMPLES DON'T OFFER ANY PRAYERS TO THEM.(IDOLS)

NO ONE CAN FORCE TO PRAY OR BOW TO THEM.
 
S

SHINY707

Guest
#6
#6
TWO MORE THING I FORGOT TO ADD:

1 DO NOT GIVE OFFERINGS TO IDOLS OR TEMPLES.
EXODUS 22:20

2 DO NOT EAT THE PRASADS (FOOD SACRIFICED TO THE IDOLS.)
ACTS 15:29.
 
JaumeJ

JaumeJ

Senior Member
#7
Jul 2, 2011
21,237
6,530
113
#7
I, for one, never even began to think you, as family in Jesus, Yeshua, would do such a thing. It is probable that making this declaration may be needful by some others, but it should not be. God bless you always.........amen
 
Y

yeshyahu

Banned
#8
Sep 25, 2013
2
0
0
#8
I am Christian from India and thought I would post a word or two. Contemporary Indians are mostly polite and may turn out to be good hosts, provided you understand their viewpoints on certain issues like general dress sense and a bit of traditional approach in public domains. Generally, your accommodation and food will be catered to, unless advised otherwise beforehand. In which case, I can provide more info on food, hotels and others.

One thing clearly understandable is that you don’t have a personal walk with Christ, else you wouldn’t have asked about idols and bowing down and such. What I would suggest is go easy on their rituals without thinking or taking in too much.

And frankly, I don’t understand why you had to mention “immersed in a culture with a very strong religion”. Far as I see, you’re just going to attend a friend’s wedding, travel around a bit and get back to where you were. Don’t sweat on things you don’t desire or want to get acquainted with. As a forewarning, India did its fair bit in straying a lot of Christians into mystics. So my advice is, just float through without getting getting in too deep.
 
levi85

levi85

Senior Member
#9
Jul 2, 2013
8,578
2,180
113
#9
if you wear some Indian outfits it will be more attractive, and people here in India would love to see you with that, it depends on you whether to bow down or not, they wouldnot force you or they be offended, they would love to see you as you are.
 
J

Jeshuvan

Pastor
Staff member
#10
Apr 15, 2012
221
2
0
#10
the answer is easy,r u out 2 please God or people.Do u want 2 offend God your Saviour or people.Also im a missionary 2 the nation of India.Be very careful when your dealing with idol worship,my advice is dont partake in anything at all
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#11
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#11
"...I imagine they wouldn't force me to do anything just as most churches here wouldn't force an Indian with a different faith here to worship like we do..."

They will not force you, since U -yourself- are willing and entering INSIDE their temples...

It is like when I attend to a Catholic church: The idols are there, and I came to see them.

It's like I were visiting a porno site and see what i could see.
 
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