advice please

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ptrfulham

Guest
#1
#1
I have been dating someone for 6 months. She is aware I am a christian. She was brought up in a methodist household, and her father was the organist there until his death 2 years ago. In his last years she believes he was treated very badly by the "christians" there, and has therefore a particular view of christians. My tension is that I do not want to dishonour God, and that despite the fact that she means the world to me, I have little peace about the relationship. I have talked to God about her and I believe she is the one yet, she does not want to get married, she has some very worldly beliefs and behaviours too. She has a three year old daughter that means the world to her, and I am priviledged to be able to take her to sunday school every weekend, although she has at present set her face against going to church. I know in the christian walk life often resembles a jigsaw puzzle and it's difficult to see how things fit together. My last few conversations with God have taken the angle of being more relaxed about how it will turn out and clearly to trust him. I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, and end the relationship which has most of everything I have ever hoped for.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
 
PopClick

PopClick

Senior Member
#2
Aug 12, 2011
4,056
138
63
#2
If you don't have peace about the relationship, I personally think you should end it.
 
Twinkle77

Twinkle77

Senior Member
#3
Sep 1, 2012
357
5
18
#3
ptrfulham said:
I have been dating someone for 6 months. She is aware I am a christian. She was brought up in a methodist household, and her father was the organist there until his death 2 years ago. In his last years she believes he was treated very badly by the "christians" there, and has therefore a particular view of christians. My tension is that I do not want to dishonour God, and that despite the fact that she means the world to me, I have little peace about the relationship. I have talked to God about her and I believe she is the one yet, she does not want to get married, she has some very worldly beliefs and behaviours too. She has a three year old daughter that means the world to her, and I am priviledged to be able to take her to sunday school every weekend, although she has at present set her face against going to church. I know in the christian walk life often resembles a jigsaw puzzle and it's difficult to see how things fit together. My last few conversations with God have taken the angle of being more relaxed about how it will turn out and clearly to trust him. I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, and end the relationship which has most of everything I have ever hoped for.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Click to expand...
Sometimes what we hope for may not be what God wants. As we all know God can see the big picture and the future.
Normally when I don't have peace about something, I just go into prayer and ask God to show me what the problem is. Most of the time God does not answer straight away. So I just lay my unrest at his feet and wait till he shows me the answer. While I'm waiting, I sit in peace and trust in him. Maybe that's what you should do as you said that you have little peace about the relationship.
 
L

libertygirl

Guest
#4
#4
ptrfulham said:
I have been dating someone for 6 months. She is aware I am a christian. She was brought up in a methodist household, and her father was the organist there until his death 2 years ago. In his last years she believes he was treated very badly by the "christians" there, and has therefore a particular view of christians. My tension is that I do not want to dishonour God, and that despite the fact that she means the world to me, I have little peace about the relationship. I have talked to God about her and I believe she is the one yet, she does not want to get married, she has some very worldly beliefs and behaviours too. She has a three year old daughter that means the world to her, and I am priviledged to be able to take her to sunday school every weekend, although she has at present set her face against going to church. I know in the christian walk life often resembles a jigsaw puzzle and it's difficult to see how things fit together. My last few conversations with God have taken the angle of being more relaxed about how it will turn out and clearly to trust him. I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, and end the relationship which has most of everything I have ever hoped for.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Click to expand...
When a relationship is God's will, He will give you a peace that surpasses all understanding. We can go to God's word and know His will for our lives, and He says not to be unequally yoked with a nonbeliever. So His answer is pretty clear.

You can trust His plans for your life. He can see your future, He knows the type of woman you need, and He's not going to give you anything second rate.
 
O

OFM

Guest
#5
#5
if u do not have peace about the realationship.
she is not the 1 for u 2 marry.
Sister PopClick is spiritually right,i agree with her.
 
K

kenisyes

Guest
#6
#6
I was a Methodist organist for quite a while (no I am not Methodist. I am a follower of Jesus who ministers across denominational barriers.) so I know something of how they think. Methodists have a strong desire to get saved, and to follow God with enthusiasm. If you feel she is the one, pray for her. If God heals her of thinking that her church represented Him, there is a good chance she will get saved and even receive the dynamism that the Holy Spirit brings. Read Wesley's biography; he was Spirit-filled and so was his dad.

Let me ask you is she free in God's eyes to marry?

Is her reason not wanting to marry because you are Christian?
 
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