Birthparents

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ChosenJC

Guest
#1
#1
Hello,

If you're a birthparent you understand what it means. If you're not you may never fully understand what it means to relinquish a child. Anyone in the adoption process has an idea of what a big decision it is. A birthparent has not given up responsibility or made the decision lightly.

God told me to stay transparent the moment I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. This was more challenging then I thought. That said, through my transparency people knew what I had planned and watched as it became my testimony. Through my testimony people understood I was doing the right thing and the only thing I was giving up was the opportunity to be a parent, and my daughter. They saw God guiding me through this and healing my broken heart after.

I'd like to talk to other birthfamilies. Have you been through this yourself? In particular I'd like to talk to other birthmoms. I know God is healing me and helping my lonely heart but I'd like to talk to someone that understands what it means to lose a child to adoption.

This forum is for birthfamilies, including grandparents, birthmoms and dads. Let's get a dialog going shall we?

-ChosenJC
 
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Kaycie

Guest
#2
#2
I gave birth to my kids. They share the same physical blood as me, the same physical DNA. But some day God will destroy all physicality. So the reality is that we are all just souls no matter what role we play on the earth, or who we are physically related to. If you go back far enough we all came from Adam and Eve, and are therefore all related. But I say to myself, this is God's child, not mine, I'm just the babysitter. He is the only true parent.

Now some people have a knack for raising children, some people do not. The best thing you can do if you know that you do not, is to put that soul into a family that can do that. There are so many barren couples out there that long for a child, yet many people are killing the child through abortion, or raising them in an environment that is physically and emotionally inadequate for them. I know first hand. My birth mom never raised me, but she wouldn't let anyone else either. She didn't correct me, often didn't feed me, and always told me to go away. I was often in danger knowingly and unknowingly. Sometimes I stayed with my aunt and uncle who took excellent care of me. They told me as an adult that they always wanted to adopt me. I said why didn't you? I could have had a life, I could have gone to college. I could have lived instead of just trying to survive from day to day. I have so many hardships even today as a result of the domino effect of the bad decisions my mother made. She even told me all through growing up that she never wanted me, that my dad made her have me.

I'm not saying that all people that should give their child up for adoption are bad, but if they know in their heart that they should, without doubt, then they should.

On a side note, we live in a day and age where we can use things that prevent pregnancy. Sometimes it is not controllable, such as in the case of rape. But if someone who does not want to be a parent can control it, then they should. And no one should have sex with another outside of marriage. Of course I'm not here to judge you, I don't know your situation. I just wanted to say that if you know that parenting isn't for you, thank you for loving that child enough to give them to a couple who wants to be parents.
 
Nautilus

Nautilus

Senior Member
#3
Jun 29, 2012
6,488
53
48
#3
Im adopted so birth parents have always held a place in my heart. Though to be honest Im terrified of looking for them.
 
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ChosenJC

Guest
#4
#4
Nautilus said:
Im adopted so birth parents have always held a place in my heart. Though to be honest Im terrified of looking for them.
Click to expand...
I started this to look for other christian birthparents, that said Nautilus if you want to talk I would love to give you insight into what your birthparents may have been feeling at the time. It may help me get through this healing time as well.
Thank you for responding!
 
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ChosenJC

Guest
#5
#5
God is faithful.
He had me tell my story from the beginning to a group of women at a retreat. I went back to being a confused teenager, then young adult, then birthmom. God has had His hand in my life from the very start and sharing this with these women was incredibly healing for them.. and me. I found another birthmom! She gave me her number and said I could call when I'm questioning my decision. Thank you Jesus I'm not alone. Thank you that my story can touch lives and has already brought healing to others.

This doesn't have to be an exclusive forum. If there is someone that wants to talk about adoption please join in. I don't mind telling my story or answering questions.
 
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ChosenJC

Guest
#6
#6
I'm looking forward to seeing my little girl this summer. Haven't seen her since she was born and I miss her. She's 2 months old now and very healthy. Her parents text pictures and tell me how she's doing.

Can't wait! :)
 
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