For overcoming an attraction...

[Jonthree6teen]

I want to say thanks to anyone who's decided to look over this thread. This isn't a big request, but it's something that I'm having a hard time getting over and I need a little strength here.

Since I started my classes last year, I meet this certain girl that overtime I grown attached to. We became good friends and eventually close to be considered a relationship beyond a friendship. I really like her.

Then that's where problems arises. My mind was drawn away from God and I allowed my deceitful heart to lead. I began to constantly think about her to a point where my joy was based on her happiness. If she was feeling depressed, I would feel the same, etc. This was going on for almost 6 months.

It wasn't until recently that the Holy Spirit reminded where my place was and who I am in Christ. I was able to redirect mind, but my heart is on the fence. The bible says that my heart and mind are suppose to one with the Holy Spirit, and yet, my heart has reminded me of my strong feelings I have for her.

Lately, as much as it pains me, I've been treating her as a friend, hoping that my feelings can return back before the attachment started. However, I feel as though this cannot happen because of all that has happened. That my choices are to remain in this relationship and ignore God or lose her completely and deal with the loss.

She's an awesome person and is definitely someone that doesn't deserve to be hurt. It was my fault that I let this get as far as it should.

Bottom line, I pray that the Holy Spirit will help me find the best solution. To remove these affections but maintain a friendship if possible.

Thanks and God Bless

 

[damombomb]

What if she came to know the Lord also?

 

[River_W]

Hey,

I wanted to add a little of my advice to your prayer request, because I'm dealing with a similar problem.

Firstly, you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. So if God is calling you to stop a developing relationship with this girl, you have to do it. It's painful, I know. (I'm still trying to break off a relationship with an atheist without hurting us both so we can still be friends.) Some people think it is best to cut themselves off completely from a person who is not Christian when stronger feelings develop. While this definitely solves the issue in time, I don't recommend it because who likes to lose friends like that? Remember that God has your greatest good in mind, as well as hers. Who knows, you might be called to lead her to Christ. How cool would that be? In any case, I'm sure if you explained your situation well in a non-offensive way, you'll still be friends. I'm a firm believer in clear communication to resolve issues. Also, do you know if she feels conflicted because you're not Muslim? You should ask. She might be wanting to talk about this, too.

Keep praying for guidance, and then sooner or later you have to muster up the courage and speak to her about what's going on. It's a terrible feeling if you feel that you can no longer have a relationship with her, because attachment is strong. But an even more terrible thing to feel is distant from God, especially if someone you care about is drawing you away from Him.

You've got some new friends who will keep you in their prayers. Stay strong and have faith. God will lead your heart and mind in the right direction.

In Christ,
River

 

[pickles]

Praying for all you ask in Jesus.
Praying also for both of you, that the Glory of God will shine before you both.

God bless
pickles

 

[shekaniah]

Jonthree6teen,

First of all...I like your user name. And Welcome to Christian Chat!

When you spend quality time with someone it is nomal to get feelings for them.
Why would so many men fall for their secretaries?
Whenever my kids like someone they are not too sure about.
I pray that if it is God's will for them to be together that the bond will flourish.
If not make it fade away...

So far my daughters have three wonderful marriages. 10yrs, 6yrs and the last one going on 5.

I will be praying for you both,
In Jesus Name, Amen

 

[Jonthree6teen]

Ladies I want to thank you all for your prayers and for the advice.

@ damombomb - I took the step in talking to her about who I am in Christ. She is totally fine with it...I think. I told her that God wanted to have a relationship with her and she finds that hard to believe. She believes that only prophets can converse with God. She's Muslim btw....Guess I should've mention that in the post. Anyway, I promised her that I'd keep her in my prayers. I'll pray until God makes his Love known to her. Well see what happens from there.

@ River_W - Thanks for the response. I definitely don't want to lose her as a friend. I feel like my situation is like that of Queen Esther in a less intense way, of course. I do believe that I was put in her life to be an influence and be influenced myself. I'll pray that God will give you guidance in your situation as well.

@ shekaniah - God Bless you and your daughters. It's rare nowadays to see faithful marriages. I would definitely love to have one myself one day, God willing. I wouldn't be able to be handle a cheating wife God-forbid.

Thanks again for your prayers and may you all have a blessed day.