God and adultery

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Apr 15, 2014
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#21
Alright, so how does one handle mental illness according to the bible?
 
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BarlyGurl

Guest
#22
If you would like to start your own thread Olerica, please do. This thread is from a husband trying to determine what to do regarding his faith, marriage and any possible future adultery incidents.
 
Apr 15, 2014
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#23
Yes, I understand that... but as it IS germane to the discussion - how to treat bi-polar with regard to sin... I thought I'd ask you in your expertise what your understanding is about how to handle that.

But truthfully, I really don't want to engage you. I don't know why I peeped open the door.
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
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#24
>>>>I really don't have much patience with people who have absolutely no understanding of mental illness. I just hope they are thankful that they are not mentally ill. And I hope even more they are not full of pride about their sanity. Because God has a way of bringing people like that down.<<<<

So it is okay for to ASSUME people have no understanding of mental illness and imply they are full of pride if they are sane?
COME ON Angela????
So reading into my post something that was NOT there??

Lots of normal people are humble, lots of normal people have pride. Sadly, lots and lots of Christians are both arrogant and proud in their haughty misbeliefs about mental illness.

However, that was NOT what my post was about. It was about you saying that sexual immorality is rampant, and me saying that so is PRIDE. Let me repeat myself, in case you misread what I say again. Pride is rampant in the Christian church. And hardly anyone ever speaks to this issue.

No comparison of normal people to bipolar people with regards to sin, pride or sexual immorality in my post.

I just said that pride is equal to sexual immorality according to the sin list in Mark 7. But of course, people who claim to use the Biblical model, but never post a single Scripture might not know about sin lists, or some of the more insidious sins. Like pride!

I don't seem to see many posts about it. But I sure do see a lot of people in this forum with a lot of pride. And arrogance.

Totally aside from their obvious ignorance about the nature of mental illness.
 
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BarlyGurl

Guest
#25
So reading into my post something that was NOT there??

Lots of normal people are humble, lots of normal people have pride. Sadly, lots and lots of Christians are both arrogant and proud in their haughty misbeliefs about mental illness.

However, that was NOT what my post was about. It was about you saying that sexual immorality is rampant, and me saying that so is PRIDE. Let me repeat myself, in case you misread what I say again. Pride is rampant in the Christian church. And hardly anyone ever speaks to this issue.

No comparison of normal people to bipolar people with regards to sin, pride or sexual immorality in my post.

I just said that pride is equal to sexual immorality according to the sin list in Mark 7. But of course, people who claim to use the Biblical model, but never post a single Scripture might not know about sin lists, or some of the more insidious sins. Like pride!

I don't seem to see many posts about it. But I sure do see a lot of people in this forum with a lot of pride. And arrogance.

Totally aside from their obvious ignorance about the nature of mental illness.
Fair enough. Thank you for CLARIFYING. :)
 
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atwhatcost

Guest
#26
You Atwhat, are making a variety of presumptions and drawing inferences from those same presumptions without BASIS and appear to be nothing more than you arguing in your own head... while directing your comments at mine.
Far better derailing you from giving your own little whirling brain games as solutions to everyone else's problems. Could you fit anymore presumptions into responses to hurting people if you actually tried? Really really? End Times JUNK in answer to what should a husband do about a bipolar wife? Do you, even once in a while, come out from your head and realize you're talking to real people about real pain?
 
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BarlyGurl

Guest
#27
Far better derailing you from giving your own little whirling brain games as solutions to everyone else's problems. Could you fit anymore presumptions into responses to hurting people if you actually tried? Really really? End Times JUNK in answer to what should a husband do about a bipolar wife? Do you, even once in a while, come out from your head and realize you're talking to real people about real pain?
You are FREE to take your own perspective. AS for REAL PAIN... uh YEAH... I am FULLY aware of REAL PAIN, I just happen to make an effort to point in the direction of where to find the solutions. I do happen to believe MOST people would prefer to live beyond the place they are at.... and thus looking FORWARD is the only effective way to facilitate that.
 
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lookingforanewlife

Guest
#28
Wow I thought I was the only one who thought that way about diseases in our society, i do believe people always know what they are doing "right from wrong" I have anyway, but these physicians seem to believe the medication is the answer. All the ones I've gone to with my wife anyway.
Suffering from Bi polar myself I can honestly say that people with bi polar know right from wrong. They just choose to ignore it. Also about the medication issue. Yes Meds do work to HELP i emphasize HELP control the symptoms but there is no CURE.
 
Dec 19, 2009
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#29
So my wife has had three different affairs over the years during her episodes of mania, I forgave her but trust now is another story. I believe God says to always forgive but adultery is also grounds for divorce in gods eyes,isn't it? It's hard trust that she won't cheat again, any advice..
Well, here is the Bible verse I think you are referring to:

[31] "It was also said, `Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.'
[32] But I say to you that every one who divorces his wife, except on the ground of unchastity, makes her an adulteress; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Matt 5:31-32 RSV

I think it’s up to you whether or not you want to divorce her.
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
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#30
I'm not an expert on any mental illness... I just have some questions.

If a person is diagnosed bipolar... they are no longer accountable for where they leave their genitals at night?
 
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atwhatcost

Guest
#31
So my wife has had three different affairs over the years during her episodes of mania, I forgave her but trust now is another story. I believe God says to always forgive but adultery is also grounds for divorce in gods eyes,isn't it? It's hard trust that she won't cheat again, any advice..
And if you followed the rest of where your original question led people, I repeat my original advice.

One bit of advice. Instead of asking others what God says, how about doing your own research on marriage, husband, wife, and divorce to see what he says to you? He really will give you your answer, but he does that by studying his words. Those words will give you a peace and understanding about your decision, because it really comes to his request for you and your marriage.
I brought you that early, because I knew quite a few people would tell you what you should do. It's pretty much one-size-fits-all on advice given on this board. So, seriously, really do check with God. And, since it sounds like you don't quite know what to expect or how to deal with bipolar, it's a good idea to research from experts and ask her doctors for whatever will help you too.

One size doesn't fit all, that's why each of us studying the word plus praying works to have God give you the advice that works for you in HIS strength. Walk apart from his answer and his strength and everything falls apart.
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
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#32
I'm not an expert on any mental illness... I just have some questions.

If a person is diagnosed bipolar... they are no longer accountable for where they leave their genitals at night?
Because of the way neurotransmitters work on the brain, someone who is manic can also be hypersexual. They truly may have little in the way of reasoning - instead psychosis rules in this state. (OR they may become paranoid, or have delusions of grandeur, gambling addictions or other manifestations of psychosis, and not commit adultery, but go off the deep end in other ways.) This is when the brain is overstimulated by too many neurotransmitters.

The opposite is also true. If a bipolar person gets depressed, they will probably lose all sexual desire or libido. Since most people, normal or not, do not like to be like this, it seems unlikely a depressed person, (bipolar or otherwise) would purposely choose to be in a state where they have no interest in sex, even in a marriage. Again, that is caused by neurotransmitters, this time a lack of them.

I minister to bipolar people. I literally have not met one person who has not run off on their spouse, or been divorced by their spouse for manic behaviour. Many of the women have lost custody of their children, and it grieves them to no end. One woman told me she has no idea what she did while psychotic, just that when she calmed down, with the help of meds, her husband was divorcing her and she had lost her baby and 3 year old son. She continues to be distraught, even though her children are in her teens. She says bipolar disorder ruined her life.

Bipolar disorder is just so weird. It is hard to believe that someone's brains can be hijacked by chemicals which are normal in the brain, in the right numbers.

Maxwel, I would refer you again to the side effects of Mirapex, used for Parkinson's disease. People on it displayed bipolar manic symptoms while on it. Apparently the drug works really well to stop the symptoms of Parkinson's, including the shaking. That is because the drug targets the lower brain stem, replacing the neurotransmitters that are not getting to that part of the brain. But because bipolar disorder occurs in the top part of the brain stem, the neurotransmitters were "leaking" into the top part of the brain stem, giving people on Mirapex the symptoms of manic bipolar disorder. Some people's lives were literally ruined due to gambling or adultery.

But when they were taken off the drug, they returned to normal. They could not understand how they could have acted that way. That is what people with bipolar disorder suffer with every day. Although the meds help, they have a huge list of side effects, which is why they, along with schizophrenics seem to go off their meds. Until the reality of what is going to happen finally sinks in after repeated hospitializations, and destroying their lives.

W5: Parkinson's drug with bad side effects | CTV News

Sorry I can't find the on-line video of the whole show. It was quite fascinating!

As for whether committing adultery in this state is a sin, all the people I work admit it is. They don't know why they did it, but they do recognize it was wrong, and a sin. One Christian woman, who lost her daughter and marriage, regrets terribly what she did. But she still does not have an answer as to how it could have been stopped, when she did not have a diagnosis, nor a clue that she was mentally ill until the dust settled and the bad deeds were done.
 
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atwhatcost

Guest
#33
Because of the way neurotransmitters work on the brain, someone who is manic can also be hypersexual. They truly may have little in the way of reasoning - instead psychosis rules in this state. (OR they may become paranoid, or have delusions of grandeur, gambling addictions or other manifestations of psychosis, and not commit adultery, but go off the deep end in other ways.) This is when the brain is overstimulated by too many neurotransmitters.

The opposite is also true. If a bipolar person gets depressed, they will probably lose all sexual desire or libido. Since most people, normal or not, do not like to be like this, it seems unlikely a depressed person, (bipolar or otherwise) would purposely choose to be in a state where they have no interest in sex, even in a marriage. Again, that is caused by neurotransmitters, this time a lack of them.

I minister to bipolar people. I literally have not met one person who has not run off on their spouse, or been divorced by their spouse for manic behaviour. Many of the women have lost custody of their children, and it grieves them to no end. One woman told me she has no idea what she did while psychotic, just that when she calmed down, with the help of meds, her husband was divorcing her and she had lost her baby and 3 year old son. She continues to be distraught, even though her children are in her teens. She says bipolar disorder ruined her life.

Bipolar disorder is just so weird. It is hard to believe that someone's brains can be hijacked by chemicals which are normal in the brain, in the right numbers.

Maxwel, I would refer you again to the side effects of Mirapex, used for Parkinson's disease. People on it displayed bipolar manic symptoms while on it. Apparently the drug works really well to stop the symptoms of Parkinson's, including the shaking. That is because the drug targets the lower brain stem, replacing the neurotransmitters that are not getting to that part of the brain. But because bipolar disorder occurs in the top part of the brain stem, the neurotransmitters were "leaking" into the top part of the brain stem, giving people on Mirapex the symptoms of manic bipolar disorder. Some people's lives were literally ruined due to gambling or adultery.

But when they were taken off the drug, they returned to normal. They could not understand how they could have acted that way. That is what people with bipolar disorder suffer with every day. Although the meds help, they have a huge list of side effects, which is why they, along with schizophrenics seem to go off their meds. Until the reality of what is going to happen finally sinks in after repeated hospitializations, and destroying their lives.

W5: Parkinson's drug with bad side effects | CTV News

Sorry I can't find the on-line video of the whole show. It was quite fascinating!

As for whether committing adultery in this state is a sin, all the people I work admit it is. They don't know why they did it, but they do recognize it was wrong, and a sin. One Christian woman, who lost her daughter and marriage, regrets terribly what she did. But she still does not have an answer as to how it could have been stopped, when she did not have a diagnosis, nor a clue that she was mentally ill until the dust settled and the bad deeds were done.
And since "mental illness" is a broad spectrum, I can also add the same problem occurs for women, in particular, with dementia. Somewhere in Stage Two, when they're to the point of forgetting who they are now, they revert back to when they were young with an added element of sexuality to the mix. They come on to just about every young man they meet, including checkout clerks, mailmen, or someone walking down the street. They weren't like that when they were young, and would be appalled at their own actions if they had a clue what was happening. Two things usually stop it there:
1. Their middle-aged kids are with them to stop them.
2. A disheveled old woman creeps out young men.

Is that sin? I don't think so. That's the disease.
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
11,782
2,947
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#34
And since "mental illness" is a broad spectrum, I can also add the same problem occurs for women, in particular, with dementia. Somewhere in Stage Two, when they're to the point of forgetting who they are now, they revert back to when they were young with an added element of sexuality to the mix. They come on to just about every young man they meet, including checkout clerks, mailmen, or someone walking down the street. They weren't like that when they were young, and would be appalled at their own actions if they had a clue what was happening. Two things usually stop it there:
1. Their middle-aged kids are with them to stop them.
2. A disheveled old woman creeps out young men.

Is that sin? I don't think so. That's the disease.
I agree with you totally about dementia. My uncle had Alzheimer's and by the time he was put in long term care, he had no idea who his family or wife were. He ended up holding hands with a woman, and got pegged as a pervert. He didn't do anything else!

I have also seen this when I was a chaplain in long term care. Christians who love God with all their hearts becoming angry, swearing, throwing things, trying to hurt people. But that is the disease that is riddling their brain into Swiss Cheese.

My MIL has Alzheimer's. She got into long term care last year and has continued to go downhill. In the beginning my SIL was bringing her to her home on the weekends, and doing things with her. One time, on Sunday just before they were going to take her back, she went completely psychotic. My SIL and her husband and 20 year old son could not restrain her. She was vicious, angry and was taking out on the family that loved her, and the people that she loved.

My MIL was a mild mannered, self contained German who did not show her emotions for anything. But as her brain deteriorates, the impulse control is destroyed and she will need more and more meds to keep her calm. She has to be on a locked ward, because she tries to escape and has no clue what province, let alone city she is in.

Sadly, by age 85, half the population has Alzheimer's. As people live physically longer, there will have to be strategies in place to deal with these people, including meds to delay the onset of the disease.

"The greatest known risk factor for Alzheimer's is advancing age. Most individuals with the disease are age 65 or older. The likelihood of developing Alzheimer's doubles about every five years after age 65. After age 85, the risk reaches nearly 50 percent. One of the greatest mysteries of Alzheimer's disease is why risk rises so dramatically as we grow older."

Alzheimer's & Dementia Risk Factors | Alzheimer's Association
 
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MyAll4Love

Guest
#35
I just want you to know I'm praying for you.
 
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purpose

Guest
#36
Go To God In Prayer. By yourself close the door. be silent and talk to him. Acknowledge him and he will direct your path! He knows how important it is. You may not be able to trust your wife , Surely you can trust GOD! Pray Pray Pray Pray.!
 
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purpose

Guest
#37
my Oh My! LOL . :p .