going to church alone, as a teenager?

[kaitlyn76]

Ok so I have posted many threads like this but I am just scared i really need advice.
i am 14 and christian but my parents are not and lately i have been really wanting to go to church. so after a couple of months of being to scared to ask i have managed to convince my dad, i am pretty sure i am going to church tomorrow. but the thing is i will be going alone and that is what makes me so scared. If i had somebody come with me like my parents or something i wouldn't be scared, but I am going by myself. I also wouldn't be scared if i was older like 23 or something. I'm only scared because i am 14 and I am going to be walking into church alone? I bet everyone is going to ask where my parents are and i wont know what to say. I don't know what to do once i get there do i just sit down or do i have to talk to the pastor or what? its just going to be so weird. I don't know if i am going to chicken out or not. please help

 

[Ugly]

When i was 14 i was invited to a youth service by one of my dads friends. He picked me up and took me, and we got there earlier than most since he had to arrive early himself. The youth service was big enough to have it's own building. My dads friend took me in there and then says 'i'll come get you afterwards' and left. It wasn't my first time in church, but it was the first time i a long time. And the first time in this church. First time by myself in church. So i know it's intimidating.
Just go in, hang out in the foyer where most other people are. Chances are a few people will come up and greet you. Maybe chat a minute before moving on. If you get too nervous go inside the sanctuary and find a place to sit. That's it.
Many churches will have the music and whatever, and sometime before the sermon starts will have a minute or two for people to go around and greet each other. You don't have to move. Just stay at your seat and wait for others to come to you. It will be quick and casual. Then, after service most people move out to the foyer or outside to chat. A few will hang back in the sanctuary. If your ride isn't there then just stand somewhere that you can see if your ride shows up. And chat with anyone who might approach. Or even go up to people and introduce yourself.
And if anyone asks about your parents just be honest. Tell them that they dropped you off. Don't worry so much, it's not a big deal. And if it's a decent church people will be friendly. They make things clear so you won't ever have to wonder what to do once service starts.
Many churches have a point where they release children and/or teens to their separate sections. Don't worry about that, just stay put. If you are curious about youth services, then after the service ask around who the youth pastor is and go ask him.

Really there is no required behavior. Before and after the service sit down, stand up, stay in the sanctuary or go to the foyer or outside, it doesn't matter. If you just watch what others do and where they go, then you'll have an idea.

 

[Leannaix]

Do you know anybody from school who goes to church? I'm sure if you asked them where they went, what they believed, etc. it might open up a chance for them to invite you before you even ask. Or you could just ask them. I know a lot of christians don't mind at all to take people to church with them. I used to go to a youth group with a friend from school all the time. Then you don't have to worry about people asking about parents, because your friend will likely introduce you as a guest. In any church I've been to, no one's ever asked more about me than where I'm from or what school I go to on the first visit.

 

[santuzza]

I went to church alone as a teenager. I know exactly what you're feeling. You don't need to make excuses for your parents, just tell the truth -- they are not church-goers. The church I went to as a teen was quite small, but they welcomed me in with open arms. They were kind and loving, and they didn't pry. They just let me be. About a year later I came forward at an altar call and gave my life to Christ. It was fantastic. And I did it all alone, as a teen.

Pray that the Holy Spirit will comfort you. If you're like me at all, once you step into church, you'll feel at home. You will feel the Holy Spirit there, and you will continue to be felt drawn by God. It's a great feeling.

God bless you. This is a courageous act, and not an easy one. I'll be praying for you.

And by the way, both of my parents came to know the Lord years after I did. God is using you to evangelize your family. But don't be obnoxious about it -- Just run your Christian race, be faithful to Him, pursue holiness, and your family will want what you have.

 

[JoshJoseph2]

I've been in the same position as you. My parents never went to church either but I ended up going with my grandmother. I go alone right now but it's something I'm comfortable with. My advise to you is to go alone if you have to. You will likely get comfortable with it eventually and will enjoy it. Try to join a youth group if you can, it may be of some help to you. Best of luck and God bless.

 

[kaitlyn76]

i don't have any christian friends unfortunately i am homeschooled

 

[KohenMatt]

I would make an effort to find out who the Youth Pastor is (if there is one) and introduce yourself and tell them you're new. I'm sure they will hook you up with someone.

As an aside, it's awesome that you'll take this initiative on your own. You willingness to step out into the unknown is a great encouragement to many of us!

 

[Ugly]

Being homeschooled doesn't mean you shouldn't have friends. I know here, in some parts of the country, kids that are homeschooled are so busy doing other activities that the parents have to cut back because they barely have time for school. And these activities are with other homeschoolers. They have plenty of friends. Perhaps try looking up if there are any homeschool groups in your area, especially Christians ones, get some good information on them, then show your parents what you found and see if they would be ok with you joining one.
Here there are different types that have varying requirements. But some may schedule field trips. Or some of the homeschooling parents would volunteer to teach classes in subjects they were good at that other parents had a harder time with, such as science lab type classes. One group here has a dance formal every year and the kids get to dress up kind of like a prom. Not everywhere has such options though. Depending on where you live and how big homeschooling is in the area you live in.

 

[dcontroversal]

Kaitlyn,

Just go, don't worry about what other people think, if they ask about you parents tell them the truth, shake hands, be friendly and remember that you are there to worship GOD and learn the truth! And if you have trusted Jesus as your savior then pray and ask him to give you peace.............!

 

[Brainfreeze]

I would say plan it out well, who's dropping you off and picking you up? Plan it out, and that will be your comfort, try to find some teens there as well, befriend them " if there as serious as you about your faith", have your phone " on mute, if you have one" go and enjoy the service, pray about this as well, find your comfort knowing Jesus is with you, God bless

 

[psychomom]

Ok so I have posted many threads like this but I am just scared i really need advice.
i am 14 and christian but my parents are not and lately i have been really wanting to go to church. so after a couple of months of being to scared to ask i have managed to convince my dad, i am pretty sure i am going to church tomorrow. but the thing is i will be going alone and that is what makes me so scared. If i had somebody come with me like my parents or something i wouldn't be scared, but I am going by myself. I also wouldn't be scared if i was older like 23 or something. I'm only scared because i am 14 and I am going to be walking into church alone? I bet everyone is going to ask where my parents are and i wont know what to say. I don't know what to do once i get there do i just sit down or do i have to talk to the pastor or what? its just going to be so weird. I don't know if i am going to chicken out or not. please help

Kaitlyn, i just wanted you to know i'd be intimidated going to a new church alone.
and i've gone to church almost my whole life!
you are not chicken...you're human. ♥

and i wanted you to know imma be praying for you.
ellie

 

[crossnote]

Maybe you can call the pastor and see if there is a woman there that can pick you up before church.
Tell him your apprehension.