i am 14. What is some way a can Overcome lust? I lust after my sister(s) I am also adopted. since I live with them, I don't know how to stop. often when I am interacting with one of them, that is when I start to have lustful thoughts. I want to interact with them without Lusting, but one of my sisters is the type of person I would call "Hot and attractive" both personality- wise and Body wise. I know the book of Leviticus; says we shall not have a sexual relationship with our sister. I want to break this Chain, but I am having a Hard time since I am adopted, and I live with the people I lust over. I talked to my dad, and he was not that helpful. Would You Know ways I could Break this Chain? It is something I want to stop but I am having a hard time doing it.
Let us establish the obvious you are a teenage male with hormones which is natural. It is also natural to be attracted to the opposite sex.
Your brain's response to the hormones is bringing the thoughts that these hormones trigger.
Testosterone drives lust; dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin create attraction; and oxytocin and vasopressin mediate attachment.
To limit attraction learn to use oxytocin and vasopressin to other healthier options.
Chemical Lust is driven by the desire for sexual gratification as this is how we are created and designed.
So being a teenage male you are high in testosterone which serves as a sex hormone but so much more.
Testosterone helps maintain men's:
- Bone density
- Fat distribution
- Muscle strength and mass
- Facial and body hair
- Red blood cell production
- Sex drive
- Sperm production
So now that you understand the physical activity going on. How do you fight it when you logically know that having feelings for your sister is wrong even as being adopted, but your brain only reads chemicals and electrical responses?
The more you focus on the thoughts, the more your body will produce the chemicals to support the thoughts.
For instance if you dwell on a math examine you will see different feeling arise and soon if your not careful you may even program your brain to have anxiety over math exams.
So number 1. You can not control the thoughts that come in the mind but you can control how long you dwell on them.
2. Learn the triggers. What triggers the thoughts as in is it something they wear, certain situations, certain actions, etc. Train yourself to limit the triggers if you can by not looking or walk away. Over time it will get easier.
3. Realize this is also a spiritual problem as we are sinful beings and humans have committed every sexual immoral act that is in the Bible. Satan will tempt in this way as well. Study the Armor of God, pray, and when you feel triggered, guide your mind to Christ.
4. Find active distractions. Sports, clubs, the gym, friends, church, etc.
5. Once you are allowed to date (according to your parents rules) this would make the brain be focused elsewhere but until then you will have to do what is stated above. Of course, dating can be a good alternative to limit focus on the sister but you would have to date Biblically as well. As in you date without sex before marriage and date only with marriage in mind. Not to date 100s of girls for fun. Once you do get to that stage, your parents will hopefully dig into this further.
Biblically over time you will renew your mind and physically you will reprogram the brain. The brain gets hardwired to respond to our actions. Which is why pornography can be so dangerous as well.
It will be difficult with mind over matter but once equipped with the spiritual you will have the best results.
Mind, body (brain), and soul. You have to focus on all 3.
4
