Just found out my GF is agnostic :(

  • Thread starter Timmytheskateboarder
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Timmytheskateboarder

Guest
#1
#1
Ive always been christian,never like super religious but yeah i love god and Jesus.I don't really go to church that often because to me its more about a personal conection with god.So anyways,Ive been in a long distance relationship with a girl for about 4 months now and i know that she comes from a christian family so i guess i always just assumed that she was still christian.But today we were chatting and the subject of religion came up and i found out that she doesn't believe.I feel really sad now i really, REALLY like her,but i feel as if my heart has been torn out now.

I didn't know where to go so i looked up christian advice stuff on Google and this place came up so i thought i would try it out.
 
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bands409

Guest
#2
#2
If you really like her, talk to her about it. Not only will help you understand why she is agnostic but it will bring you guys alot closer.
 
Thomas60

Thomas60

Banned
#3
Jun 20, 2010
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What is the definition for someone who doesn't believe?

Anyway, on the subject at hand, it basically comes down to 2 Corinthians 6:14, use the KJV and not the newer translations which edit out the word 'unequally'.
"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"

Many christians have a consensus that you should not enter relationships with unbelievers, others take the term 'unequally yoked' to refer to the control and influence both sides have on each others beliefs and expressions in a relationship.

What should not be done, is to base a relationship on the presumption you can lead them to conversion.
 
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Tatz

Guest
#4
#4
Thomas60 said:
What is the definition for someone who doesn't believe?

Anyway, on the subject at hand, it basically comes down to 2 Corinthians 6:14, use the KJV and not the newer translations which edit out the word 'unequally'.
"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"

Many christians have a consensus that you should not enter relationships with unbelievers, others take the term 'unequally yoked' to refer to the control and influence both sides have on each others beliefs and expressions in a relationship.

What should not be done, is to base a relationship on the presumption you can lead them to conversion.
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True...do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. So, before you get into a relationship with someone, it is important to find out what their beliefs are before committing yourself.

Also, you cannot get into an unequally yoked relationship thinking that you will win the unbeliever to Christ. It does not work and if it does, it will be to the opposite, you(the believer) will be won to the world.

We are called to be wise in our dealings, and compromising your beliefs for 'love' is not wisdom.

My advice, take a break!!!
 
Vladimir_Ukr

Vladimir_Ukr

Senior Member
#5
May 26, 2010
226
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#5
Timmytheskateboarder said:
Ive always been christian,never like super religious but yeah i love god and Jesus.I don't really go to church that often because to me its more about a personal conection with god.So anyways,Ive been in a long distance relationship with a girl for about 4 months now and i know that she comes from a christian family so i guess i always just assumed that she was still christian.But today we were chatting and the subject of religion came up and i found out that she doesn't believe.I feel really sad now i really, REALLY like her,but i feel as if my heart has been torn out now.

I didn't know where to go so i looked up christian advice stuff on Google and this place came up so i thought i would try it out.
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This is a very difficult. Take a time. The Lord give you answer if you ask him. Put your trust in the Lord.
For I know the plans I have for you,"
declares the Lord , "plans to prosper you
and not to harm you, plans to give you
hope and a future.
(Jeremiah 29:11)
P.S. Do whatever the Lord tells you and the God bless you.
 
P

perdonato

Guest
#6
#6
Yeahhhhhhhh... You know, it's easy for adults to agree to disagree but it's tough when kids come into the mix or when you want to share a conversation that relates to your beliefs. If Jesus is at the core of your life then it would be hard for her to be included in that... but as Thomas suggested, it's an opportunity for a conversation and hopefully bringing her back to Christ.

Obviously God has a plan. So I suggest praying and seeking that plan now (and always :))

Prayers for you.
 
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Psalm2713

Guest
#8
#8
I totally understand... you will need to talk to her and see if she will give God a place in her life... otherwise you will just have to let her go.. because God comes first in our decisions... meanwhile pray that she opens up her heart to God..... :)
 
LaylieCalmMind

LaylieCalmMind

Banned
#9
Apr 24, 2011
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I don't know the details of your relationship, or how serious it is, but I think you're overreacting. Why is it such a horrible thing that she's agnostic? There's nothing about that which will make her any less of good person to be in a relationship with. I would advise that you just calm down a bit, and don't treat her any differently, because she's no different than she was the whole time you knew her. Feel free to start a conversation about the topic though, just keep it calm and peaceful. And you don't have to convert her or anything, just chill out, everything is fine :)
 
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Mrcymstr

Guest
#10
#10
I truly know exactly how it is my friend. I just recently had a very similar situation... she was beautiful and seemed perfect but I found out she was post modern "all roads lead to heaven". It was a difficult situation but I did decide it could not go on. Then purpose of dating is to find a spouse and one cannot be married to someone who doesn't share the belief in the 5 Sola's. I will not say since I made the decision it has been easy, I will not tell you it made my life better in any way, I will tell you biblically it was the right choice As many have pointed out about the unequally yolked situation. It is something to learn from however, I took away that I was very foolish in not finding this out BEFORE the emotions were so great in stature. I will most certainly pray for you and that situation. But know your not alone in this as Christians our satisfaction is in Christ and we often forget that. God bless you my brother and may your focus remain on the Gospel.
 
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Timmytheskateboarder

Guest
#11
#11
LaylieCalmMind said:
I don't know the details of your relationship, or how serious it is, but I think you're overreacting. Why is it such a horrible thing that she's agnostic? There's nothing about that which will make her any less of good person to be in a relationship with. I would advise that you just calm down a bit, and don't treat her any differently, because she's no different than she was the whole time you knew her. Feel free to start a conversation about the topic though, just keep it calm and peaceful. And you don't have to convert her or anything, just chill out, everything is fine :)
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Yeah i guess your right,i kinda overreacted.Its just i grew up in a really conservative family and i'm not used to people that aren't christian.
 
LaylieCalmMind

LaylieCalmMind

Banned
#12
Apr 24, 2011
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Timmytheskateboarder said:
Yeah i guess your right,i kinda overreacted.Its just i grew up in a really conservative family and i'm not used to people that aren't christian.
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Well, this is your chance to open up a little and experience something new! Good luck, just keep in mind there's nothing to fear.
 
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lexieydoodle

Guest
#13
#13
my parents are in interfaith couple and it was amazing to grow up in that household. I think the only thing that matters is, if your having children and it's important to you. To decided what you are going to raise the kids. My parents had a loose hand on the matter and I ended up really loving Christianity and pursuing it with a fervor(I evn wanted to be a nun when i was a youngin:p)

but anyway the point is that interfaith marriages WORK. Especially since she is agnostic that doesn't go along with any baggage at all. If anything this is a chance to strengthen your faith by hearing other viewpoints on God and having a good discussion. It sounds like an opportunity not a limitation.

best of luck!
 
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RanShaTo84

Guest
#14
#14
lexieydoodle said:
my parents are in interfaith couple and it was amazing to grow up in that household. I think the only thing that matters is, if your having children and it's important to you. To decided what you are going to raise the kids. My parents had a loose hand on the matter and I ended up really loving Christianity and pursuing it with a fervor(I evn wanted to be a nun when i was a youngin:p)

but anyway the point is that interfaith marriages WORK. Especially since she is agnostic that doesn't go along with any baggage at all. If anything this is a chance to strengthen your faith by hearing other viewpoints on God and having a good discussion. It sounds like an opportunity not a limitation.

best of luck!
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I'm fully aware of the whole 'unequally yoked' business that appears in Scripture, but for the 10th time on this site I offer the example of my younger brother and his GF. He was raised Roman Catholic just like I was and his GF is a Sunni Muslim. They have been together about 7 years now and frankly their relationship rocks. They are very much in love and very dedicated to each other. As a born again Christian I could bat him over the head and tell him to date ONLY Christian girls but the fact of the matter is this: who he chooses to date is his business, not mine.
 
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jimmydiggs

Guest
#15
#15
If it has a chance to pull you away from God, Run.
 
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wolfywolfs

Guest
#16
#16
jimmydiggs said:
If it has a chance to pull you away from God, Run.
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yer like everything else life throws at you can turn you away from god what do you do stay in a little closed of box with your bible
 
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jimmydiggs

Guest
#17
#17
wolfywolfs said:
yer like everything else life throws at you can turn you away from god what do you do stay in a little closed of box with your bible
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I can't find any boxes small enough. :)
 
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Fauna

Guest
#18
#18
brother, we discussed this in youth today and its a sticky subject. The world says be with who you want but God says we should be equally yoked. so to this i will say that you should pray about the subject and pray God gives you an answer and if she continues to deny Christ then you need to leave and find the woman God has for you what you may be feeling is just pure lust which is the devils counterfit for love so take a step back release your feelings and pray about it and really listen to what God has to say because a marriage/any relationship not bound by Christ is doomed to fail. ill be praying for you

With love,
Fauna
 
X

XboughtwithapriceX

Guest
#19
#19
With prayer and supplication, it is eventually your decision to make, but I just thought I should throw out some scripture.

We all know the dont be unequally yoked for what fellowship has light with darkness? and what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness.


Deuteronomy

You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods. Then the anger of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly.



There is of course nothing inherently wrong with dating a non-Christian. There are many stories of Christians going out with non-Christians who subsequently give their life to God and the two go on to get married. But there are also stories to the contrary of great heartache and eventual splitting before or after marriage.


The bible says to GUARD YOUR HEART ABOVE ALL
Be careful who you get together with as bad company corrupts the spirit, can a non-Christian partner help you spiritually?
There is no relationship more fulfilling than when both partners are God centered.
We need constant spiritual growth, our partners need to be able to grow together with us.
When you dating a non-christian you may have issues that your partner doesnt see to be a issue at all. Example....sex before marriage,when one is indifferent temptation can be hard to resist, commitment to you might not be commitment to her, this will be unfair to you both, allowing you to break certain rules that you know you cant.
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]IF YOU DON'T WANT TO MARRY A NON-CHRISTIAN,DON'T DATE ONE.
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