J
As I read these forums so many of the threads are about people being anxious to find someone to share their lives. Since many of them have been alone either all of their lives or most of their lives, it’s understandable. But, the past couple of years have been about the exact opposite for me. Maybe for some of you as well.
Upon being widowed after an incredible 15 year marriage, friends who meant well pushed me into dating when I really didn’t want to. I then met someone with whom I had a 3 year relationship, and, when that was over (he moved to the other side of the planet haha), again I felt pushed into relationships that I was not ready for, and they didn’t go well at all. Mostly because I put up walls that guys were slamming their faces into. I realize that now and feel badly about it, but I have really needed time to heal…do some things I needed to do/learn/experience for myself. Some alone time. I often feel as though I am living my life backwards.
People in these threads have spoken about all of this so-called “wisdom” I have. If there is any wisdom in anything I say, it is surely God given and most definitely hard learned. He has been very gracious to me…and so very patient.
In law enforcement we run into trouble when everyone else is running away. Apparently the opposite is true of relationships for me. I have been running ..and hiding. Maybe I’m ready for that to change. I don’t know. It will take someone very special to make that happen…for me to have the desire to trust and become as vulnerable as being in love requires.
If there is anyone frequenting these forums who understands where I’m coming from….like you need a timeout, I would encourage you to TAKE all of the time you feel you need. It’s worth it. I can’t imagine how any of us could ever be the half of a precious whole we need to be in a relationship otherwise.
Don’t allow the loneliness you confront cause you to run headlong into situations that are not God’s best for you. Take the time to spend with Him. Let Him show you who you are. Who you are in Him. What He wants for you. Surely that is true whether you are living your life backwards or not. J
Prayerfully…
Upon being widowed after an incredible 15 year marriage, friends who meant well pushed me into dating when I really didn’t want to. I then met someone with whom I had a 3 year relationship, and, when that was over (he moved to the other side of the planet haha), again I felt pushed into relationships that I was not ready for, and they didn’t go well at all. Mostly because I put up walls that guys were slamming their faces into. I realize that now and feel badly about it, but I have really needed time to heal…do some things I needed to do/learn/experience for myself. Some alone time. I often feel as though I am living my life backwards.
People in these threads have spoken about all of this so-called “wisdom” I have. If there is any wisdom in anything I say, it is surely God given and most definitely hard learned. He has been very gracious to me…and so very patient.
In law enforcement we run into trouble when everyone else is running away. Apparently the opposite is true of relationships for me.
I have been running ..and hiding. Maybe I’m ready for that to change. I don’t know. It will take someone very special to make that happen…for me to have the desire to trust and become as vulnerable as being in love requires. If there is anyone frequenting these forums who understands where I’m coming from….like you need a timeout, I would encourage you to TAKE all of the time you feel you need. It’s worth it.
I can’t imagine how any of us could ever be the half of a precious whole we need to be in a relationship otherwise.Don’t allow the loneliness you confront cause you to run headlong into situations that are not God’s best for you. Take the time to spend with Him. Let Him show you who you are. Who you are in Him. What He wants for you. Surely that is true whether you are living your life backwards or not. J
Prayerfully…
