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Keep them as only thoughts, dont follow through with the thoughts. I know how you feel, as I wanted to do the same. Look God wants you alive because he has a plan for you, and if you take your own life to try be with your Dad. I miss my father, and mother that I never seen, She passed away when I was 1yrs old, my father died when I was 12yrs old, so you see, it happens to the best of us. But You must carry on living your life. Because God has a wonderful plan and path for you. and for you to carried them out you must live for God. as God lives in you.
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Now now it's gonna be okay. I lost my dad 6 years ago. The worst part about it was hearing the cries from my mom. I had to be strong for her. I didn't cry as much and so I focused on other things to not think about it but at the end of the day my dad would still be gone and my mom would still be crying. I'm here to tell you that you aren't alone. God hears our cries and will always catch out tears. God is our Heavenly Father who will always make a way when it seems there is none. It gets better but it doesn't get easier. But remember weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning. Ps. 30:5. It's okay to mourn it's healthy but there is also a time to get up and laugh and dance. Eccl. 3:4. Just because you aren't weeping over your dad doesn't mean you love him less. Your dad will ALWAYS love you! And he wouldn't want you crying anymore. He wants you smiling and being happy and being a blessing in someone's life as he has been for you. Lord has taken care of him and now let The Lord take care of you. God bless and of you ever feel the need to talk to someone I'm here to listen! 
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