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R
YES!
People will say things like, AWE, its okay the right one is coming soon. And I'll be like....
( I don't know what the correct response is to that)
the one I don't like, more than any other is the, "When are you going to give your mother grand children?" <guilt trip. Because if love won't drive me to marry someone maybe guilt will. I should feel guilty for letting that children's pastor go because after 2 months of dating, we should have been engaged or something, not breaking up.
Married people can be strange and give the weirdest lectures. Here is a sample from a woman at my church: "What is wrong with (whatzerface)? She has a nice job, she is a nice girl, you could use a nice girl. I've talked with her parents and she's single as far as they know. I think she likes you. Why don't you ask her out? Are you too good for her, is that it? Whats your problem?"
once again (I have no idea what they are complaining about or how to respond to make ^that^ stop)
People will say things like, AWE, its okay the right one is coming soon. And I'll be like....
( I don't know what the correct response is to that)the one I don't like, more than any other is the, "When are you going to give your mother grand children?" <guilt trip. Because if love won't drive me to marry someone maybe guilt will. I should feel guilty for letting that children's pastor go because after 2 months of dating, we should have been engaged or something, not breaking up.
Married people can be strange and give the weirdest lectures. Here is a sample from a woman at my church: "What is wrong with (whatzerface)? She has a nice job, she is a nice girl, you could use a nice girl. I've talked with her parents and she's single as far as they know. I think she likes you. Why don't you ask her out? Are you too good for her, is that it? Whats your problem?"
once again
(I have no idea what they are complaining about or how to respond to make ^that^ stop)
The enemy is a liar, he wages war with our souls and tries to discourage us all the time. I do not know if it is in the cards for me to be married. Would it be nice? Sure. Could it be a big headache,distraction and responsibility? Yes!
Do i want to be any harder on myself than the church has been, well meaning folk have been? Of course not...I need to be gracious with myself. For whatever reason, for now..i am single. Right now, I am single..should i be looking for a wife? I do not see it as a sin, so long as one looks for a person who is equally yoked to you..But i also know how it was such a distraction for me wheni was younger. I was so hard on myself because all these kids in bible school were getting married, all my old colleagues and friends got married. I am the only single one. So...yea it can be a huge struggle, you almost are tempted to think, What is wrong with me? Why won't anyone wanna marry me? You start to believe you are 'damaged goods'..but that's a lie too. All in all..i can relate so much to this thread in its entirety. All i know is..right now..for now..i am this way. It was not my plan or intention to be single this long..but I do want to believe God knows all things.only he knows why this is how it is for me..
R
I get that too..what is the funniest response is when i gently and non chalantly respond. Oh i am not married, the person gets all embarrassed or awkward and says, 'I am so sorry!' Why in the world are you sorry? I am not, it just is what it is..not all are meant to be married! Sometimes i wonder if this is what God wills for me, am i mad that it may be this way? No..sometimes i wish i would know for certain so if i am meant to carry my cross and be like Paul then i would do that and not even give this silly distraction one more minute of my time/thoughts/energy.
R
yea..that was not a high pressure situation..lol. Folks mean good, i truly do feel that..but yeah, i do NOT like being set up..not by my mom,my brother,my father, or 'friends' or church family. I am a grown man and know what i like, and if i decide to get in a relationship..i know far better than you do what i like. I remember getting set up for a date with someone who was a coworker of a friend..talk about a shallow person, and not even a christian. And he was like, oh she's great..really pretty. She was ok at best, but not a very 'pretty' person on the inside. So needless to say, we never hung out again.
L
i have seen this happen before in my life too, at age of 25 many of my friends started to get married and having children and then many thoughts and doubts came into my mind, and i feel that i lost a lot of time struggling with those thoughts too.
Now i know that im not wrong or defective, but God decided that i be single in this moment, i usually think that if Paul said "But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am" is because to be single has more advantages and when God decide that i will serve him better as married than single then i know i will find my husband.
Now i know that im not wrong or defective, but God decided that i be single in this moment, i usually think that if Paul said "But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am" is because to be single has more advantages and when God decide that i will serve him better as married than single then i know i will find my husband.