opinion on relationship and faith

[spirit]

Hi ,

This is for all Catholics and Christians for opinions. If you husband is working long hours weekly to bring money and bread on the table for the family , but deep down you really don't want the money but for the family and you to be closer together, would that be a sign of different needs? Luckliy my children are school age and a bit independent but very tired of holding up the responsiblity. No-one can take the place of my role as the mother , but for goodness sake when does it end as i never imagined married life can be so challenging.... anyone in similar boat? Thanks

 

[Faithseeker87]

Faith and unity doesn't bring nourishment.

You should get a new orientation of your goal(s) in your life as in..get a hobby, pick up some interesting reads, work out or whatever brings you joy.

Marriage, at least to my understanding, is less challenging than living a life alone.

Maybe if you provided some more information about your problem then I could provide more help about this topic.

 

[Lucy68]

Probably there are many in the same boat

My husband has always been a hard worker and a wonderful provider and I'm so blessed to be married to him. I realize this even more when reading posts of wives who are married to lazy men.

I think it's easy for men to see their 'work' as expressions of how much they love their family. In some ways I can definitely understand this.

Sometimes we need to remind them that there are other needs too....like spending time with their wives and children....talking and doing things together.

The responsibilities as a mom can be enormous! Especially if you're the one doing all those things that a family and household needs done...cooking, cleaning, chauffeuring, doctor's appts, piano lessons....this list is endless. But you know, these are important too.

My children are grown and going to school and living on their own....and I love having my time back. Is that an awful thing to say? Just remember that someday, they will be living on their own and your calendar will be delightfully empty.

But it's also important to maintain your relationship with your husband. Talk to him honestly about how you feel. You may even want to plan some 'get-aways' for yourself to recharge your batteries (and some for just the two of you). There's lots of women retreats ....that's a great name for them .

Praying for strength and guidance for you sister

 

[Jullianna]

I agree with Lucy about some men showing their affection for their families in this way. Maybe some encouragement given to your children to be more affectionate toward their father, seek his counsel on things more and requests from them to participate in activities would be helpful. Most men respond more positively to respect and affectionate requests from their families than to demands or complaints.

Being a mom is both blessed and exhausting, isn't it? But...as Lucy says, they'll be grown and on their own in the blink of an eye *sniffle*

 

[Ugly]

Men gain self esteem and confidence and feel more manly when they know their family isn't lacking financially. This is his way of showing he's a good man, by providing more than he had for his family. While women love financial security, men often take it farther at the expense of their family. It may pay to sit and explain it to him. Just be very sensitive about it, if you become critical or overly negative it will feel to him like all his hard work is not respected. You are dealing with his esteem and masculinity so be careful not to tread on those things.

 

[Colt]

Whoa whoa whoa my dad almost died twice of the stress of working 6 days a week at a job he doesn't qualify for, he got the job through favor with God but the whole family knows he has dedicated his entire life to us and when we get to wake up in life where we are it's because of him and it's like he's right there giving it to us. There's a kid's view and I hope I'm not the only unselfish kid out there that believes this.