L
Lately Ive felt like that nobody cares about me. I'm hurt all the time, I'm really sensitive and I feel like all anybody cares about is themselves. I would never commit suicide, but I always think of how the world would be without me. Not better, but my death would not make a difference. All I really do is exist. I have really bad self esteem and social anxiety because of when I was growing up I was really shy and people would tease me. People also used to call me ugly when I was in middle school. I'm 17 now, and ever since I got to high school people have been calling me pretty. I don't believe them. Why should I believe them when just a few years ago I was the ugly duckling that nobody would want to be with. Ive just been trying to get over my social anxiety, nothing has worked, I havent seen a psychologist yet, but I want to. My mom hasnt made the appointment yet. My younger sister has autism and my mom acts like Im a terrible sister. I can never win anyone over. Ive lost all confidence in myself and other people. I look in the mirror and see a monster. I cant trust anyone anymore. My family is too consumed with themselves to even care. I try praying but nothing has happened yet. I just need some advice to feel good about myself and how to ask God for help. I'm lonely and I feel pathetic. Please help me.