Pain constantly eating at my heart

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lauren123

Guest
#1
#1
Lately Ive felt like that nobody cares about me. I'm hurt all the time, I'm really sensitive and I feel like all anybody cares about is themselves. I would never commit suicide, but I always think of how the world would be without me. Not better, but my death would not make a difference. All I really do is exist. I have really bad self esteem and social anxiety because of when I was growing up I was really shy and people would tease me. People also used to call me ugly when I was in middle school. I'm 17 now, and ever since I got to high school people have been calling me pretty. I don't believe them. Why should I believe them when just a few years ago I was the ugly duckling that nobody would want to be with. Ive just been trying to get over my social anxiety, nothing has worked, I havent seen a psychologist yet, but I want to. My mom hasnt made the appointment yet. My younger sister has autism and my mom acts like Im a terrible sister. I can never win anyone over. Ive lost all confidence in myself and other people. I look in the mirror and see a monster. I cant trust anyone anymore. My family is too consumed with themselves to even care. I try praying but nothing has happened yet. I just need some advice to feel good about myself and how to ask God for help. I'm lonely and I feel pathetic. Please help me.
 
J

JJAC

Guest
#2
#2
Well I care
if you want to talk just Pm me
there are people that care about you just now that
You are in my prayers
 
J

JJAC

Guest
#3
#3
and God is always with you even when it may like feel like He is.
but he is always there
 
K

Kyouken01

Guest
#4
#4
I'll be praying for you.

I'm not sure if you know this, but God doesn't just love you.
He likes you, too. He enjoys hearing from you, hanging out with you, and enjoys communing with you.

When you received and accepted Jesus Christ as your savior and Lord, you were given eternal life.
John 17:3 - "And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent."
In this verse eternal life is described as a very personal relationship with God.

God likes you. God loves you, too.
John 3:16 - "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life."
He loves you so much that He gave you everything you would ever need by His good grace, and all you need is Jesus Christ. No matter what happens to you in life, you have Jesus Christ.

Because of what happened with you and your spirit at the time of you accepting Jesus Christ as your savior, the spirit of God now dwells in you (1st Corinthians 3:16). The spirit of God is holy, acceptable, righteous, and so much more. That's who you are in the spirit. And that's how God sees you. You won't be prideful if you look at who you are in your spirit so long as you know, acknowledge, and give all credit to Who made you that way and that that is what the Word says about you. Rest assured, you are holy, acceptable, righteous, and much more (and it's all 'cause of Jesus) :)

I hope this helps you out a bit.
 
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Lucy68

Senior Member
#5
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
22
0
#5
lauren123 said:
Lately Ive felt like that nobody cares about me. I'm hurt all the time, I'm really sensitive and I feel like all anybody cares about is themselves. I would never commit suicide, but I always think of how the world would be without me. Not better, but my death would not make a difference. All I really do is exist. I have really bad self esteem and social anxiety because of when I was growing up I was really shy and people would tease me. People also used to call me ugly when I was in middle school. I'm 17 now, and ever since I got to high school people have been calling me pretty. I don't believe them. Why should I believe them when just a few years ago I was the ugly duckling that nobody would want to be with. Ive just been trying to get over my social anxiety, nothing has worked, I havent seen a psychologist yet, but I want to. My mom hasnt made the appointment yet. My younger sister has autism and my mom acts like Im a terrible sister. I can never win anyone over. Ive lost all confidence in myself and other people. I look in the mirror and see a monster. I cant trust anyone anymore. My family is too consumed with themselves to even care. I try praying but nothing has happened yet. I just need some advice to feel good about myself and how to ask God for help. I'm lonely and I feel pathetic. Please help me.
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This could be something I wrote from MY high school years!

I think many girls go through this Lauren so don't feel like you're alone in this. Maturing is never an easy thing :) Most people go through the 'ugly duckling' stage. Your self confidence will increase as you get out into the big wide world. Do you have a part-time job? That will help you develop social skills.

There's nothing wrong with being sensitive. I think that's a God-given gift so look down on it :) You may wish you'd be tougher and not so easily hurt but that would mean hardening your heart...do you really want to do that?

Keeping a journal really helped me during this time. It may not seem like it now, but this is an incredible time for you. Your mind and heart is opening up to new things...Christ will lead you if you keep Him close. He will show you how to 'love yourself' in a healthy way.

Family members probably care more than you think they do. Everybody just gets tied-up with their own affairs.

I don't think you need to see a psychologist, sweetie; you just need people to talk to. You sound perfectly normal to me :) (Unless there's other things going on that you don't want to share)

Also, remember...things change. They always change so don't feel like you're forever stuck in a rut.

Praying for you, sweet girl, hang in there :)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#6
#6
Hi Lauren
Sadly, some of the things you said, are actually true. We live in a selfish, self centered world. Many people don't care about others. But that doesn't mean there aren't some that do care. Its kind of a choice, are you going to put your focus on the vast majority of the world? Or start putting focus on those around you that do show that they care?
Granted i don't know you, but based off the paragraph you wrote, i see nothing about you that would be inherently unlikeable. You seem intelligent, and insightful. You wrote well, and with clarity.
I know when i was around your age i felt sad, lonely and depressed. I was also sensitive as well, so i have an idea of how you feel. But one thing i learned is that a lot of that is self imposed. We bring it on ourselves by hiding. If you don't put yourself out there then people will not notice you. The forums is a great place to start changing that. Get involved in some of the discussions, get your opinion out, make up your own threads, comment on other peoples posts. Let people see you, your opinions and get your name out there. Offer help and advice when you see something you can be helpful with. This helps pull you out of the shadows and into the arena to begin being part of whats going on, so you aren't sitting in the corner by yourself, not being involved, and wondering why you're alone.
Far as the 'ugly duckling' is concerned, if you remember the story, that was no duckling at all. And it grew to be a beautiful swan, more lovely than the 'ducklings' it grew up with. So apparently you've hit your 'swan stage'. You're finding out that you are greater than you ever thought you could be. Don't fight it.
Bottom line, people do care. If no one cared, no one would have answered you. But there are some of us that have. Focus on that. I hope that one, or any of these posts help you. Take care and i hope to see you around the forums from now on.
 
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Unashamed2323

Guest
#7
#7
I felt that pain being the middle child for awhile but you were made in Gods image and he also can be your friend. If i had no other friends then god id still be grateful that i lived a life with the best by my side and i will live then on after i die forever with my one true friend. CONTINUE TO PRAY AND CARE FOR YOUR SISTER EVEN IF YOUR NOT GETTING THE APPRECIATION YOU WILL BE MORE THEN SATISFIED WITH THE OUTCOME
 
A

AnandaHya

Guest
#8
#8
lauren123 said:
Lately Ive felt like that nobody cares about me. I'm hurt all the time, I'm really sensitive and I feel like all anybody cares about is themselves. I would never commit suicide, but I always think of how the world would be without me. Not better, but my death would not make a difference. All I really do is exist. I have really bad self esteem and social anxiety because of when I was growing up I was really shy and people would tease me. People also used to call me ugly when I was in middle school. I'm 17 now, and ever since I got to high school people have been calling me pretty. I don't believe them. Why should I believe them when just a few years ago I was the ugly duckling that nobody would want to be with. Ive just been trying to get over my social anxiety, nothing has worked, I havent seen a psychologist yet, but I want to. My mom hasnt made the appointment yet. My younger sister has autism and my mom acts like Im a terrible sister. I can never win anyone over. Ive lost all confidence in myself and other people. I look in the mirror and see a monster. I cant trust anyone anymore. My family is too consumed with themselves to even care. I try praying but nothing has happened yet. I just need some advice to feel good about myself and how to ask God for help. I'm lonely and I feel pathetic. Please help me.
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First thing is First.

GOD made YOU. Are you saying He made something that is worthless?

You are precious to Him.

the people who say your were ugly were lying. You were NEVER ugly to God. To Him You ARE beautiful and you are His.

You sound depressed.

I would be too if I based my happiness upon what other people thought, did or didn't do with for or about me.

Your confidence should be upon God's faithfulness and His love for YOU.

How do you ask God for Help?

You pray and ask for wisdom WITHOUT doubting that YOU are worth it to HIM and HE loves YOU.

James 1:4-6
New King James Version (NKJV)
4 But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.

get rooted in God's WORD. Read the BIBLE pray, learn about God's promises to YOU and LISTEN to what YOU can do for the WORLD after you learn what TRUE love is.

God loved YOU so much that HE sent Jesus to DIE on the cross for you.

Do you understand what that kind of love is?

Do you believe?

Rejoice for GOD IS ALIVE, HE has Risen!

and He loves YOU.

Do you believe?
 
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