The Confidence Cue. Why we respond to confidence charisma.

[1still_waters]

Disclaimer: I'm sure there are nuances and exceptions to the rule that do not apply. I acknowledge said existence of said exceptions. I also acknowledge that this is an Internet forum where people love debunking things by pointing out the obvious fact that exceptions to said rules exist.

My Theory: In general, people respond positively to people that are confident/have charisma, because possessing those qualities is a sign/signal/cue to people that they have been accepted by "the herd".

Usually people are confident/have charisma, because they have received positive reinforcement from people.

Usually people are unconfident because they haven't received that positive reinforcement.

When we see someone who is confident or has charisma, it serves as an indirect cue/sign/signal that they have been accepted by "the herd".

As many tend to like to follow "the herd" they interpret said signal/cue as a sign it's ok to like/follow along.

That's my theory.

If it's true, or partially true, what are the implications in how we live for God and relate to people?

What does it say about our ability to be easily fooled by confident/charasmatic people?

 

[wwjd_kilden]

Agree, as long as the confidence does not cross the line of being a self - obsessed *cough*

Implications:

- Keep an eye out for those who people flock around. Chances are high they are either very "good" or very "bad"

- As Christians we should always try to build each other up.
Even when correcting each other it should be done in love, and with support to get back on track, being there all the way through the process if needed.

 

[Zork]

Disclaimer: I'm sure there are nuances and exceptions to the rule that do not apply. I acknowledge said existence of said exceptions. I also acknowledge that this is an Internet forum where people love debunking things by pointing out the obvious fact that exceptions to said rules exist.

My Theory: In general, people respond positively to people that are confident/have charisma, because possessing those qualities is a sign/signal/cue to people that they have been accepted by "the herd".

Usually people are confident/have charisma, because they have received positive reinforcement from people.

Usually people are unconfident because they haven't received that positive reinforcement.

When we see someone who is confident or has charisma, it serves as an indirect cue/sign/signal that they have been accepted by "the herd".

As many tend to like to follow "the herd" they interpret said signal/cue as a sign it's ok to like/follow along.

That's my theory.

If it's true, or partially true, what are the implications in how we live for God and relate to people?

What does it say about our ability to be easily fooled by confident/charasmatic people?

You forgot another obvious thing about confidence. It doesn't matter because someone that is very into sin... can be confident about that.

Why are people attracted to confidence... in short... it's because people are _____ (not very smart)

Why are they not very smart? Because like I said before... it doesn't matter... what does matter is WHY someone is confident... or WHY he/she is not confident.

Stepping back a little.. this is similair to happiness... why do people value being happy so much? Like confidence.. it looks so good.. but the reality is people be happy about sin.... so again.. like confidence ... happiness doesn't matter aswell. But WHY your happy... WHY your not happy.

See a dead body on the flooor.. and Bob smiles... his happy, isn't that good? Nope it is not, but the world... nods quickyly and says "Just do what makes you happy!"

I think I made my point... confidence alone... being valued by itself.... is a world concept... and sadly.. a lot of people, I imagine... will go to hell for it. (sigh)

Oh well... atleast people that have read this, now know better.

 

[djness]

con·fi·dence noun \ˈkän-fə-dən(t)s, -ˌden(t)s\

Definition of CONFIDENCE

1
a : a feeling or consciousness of one's powers or of reliance on one's circumstances <had perfect confidence in her ability to succeed> <met the risk with brash confidence>
b : faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way <have confidence in a leader>
2
: the quality or state of being certain : certitude <they had every confidence of success>

In general, people respond positively to people that are confident/have charisma, because possessing those qualities is a sign/signal/cue to people that they have been accepted by "the herd".

When we see someone who is confident or has charisma, it serves as an indirect cue/sign/signal that they have been accepted by "the herd".

Are you saying that people are only confident when accepted in groups? I don't get how being part of a group has bearing on every ones confidence. The word people was used to many times for me to understand who people were in the end.

If it's true, or partially true, what are the implications in how we live for God and relate to people?

What does it say about our ability to be easily fooled by confident/charasmatic people?

Being certain of who we are in God, which I think most christians are not sure of , would make all the diifference in how we live. If you as a an individual[general] were confident in your position before the throne of God then you would relate to people humbly and with real authority.

Even in simple things I have doubted myself or what I know and have been fooled by people who were more confident, even if they didn't actually know what they were talking about.

 

[Stephen63]

*Methinks the hook in Stilly's pic didn't pull him off the stage nearly fast enough.*

 

[djness]

You forgot another obvious thing about confidence. It doesn't matter becaus] someone that is very into sin... can be confident about that.

Why are people attracted to confidence... in short... it's because people are _____ (not very smart)

Why are they not very smart? Because like I said before... it doesn't matter... what does matter is WHY someone is confidient... or WHY he/she is not confident.

I don't see the correlation between intelligence and confidence.

Stepping back a little.this is similair to happiness... why do people value being happy so much? Like confidience.. it looks so good.. but the reality is people be happy about sin.... so again..like confidence ... happiness doesn't matter aswell. But WHY your happy... WHY your not happy.

http://www.openbible.info/topics/self_confidence 73 bible verses about confidence
I think God actually tells us we need to be confident.

I think I made my point... confidence alone... being valued by itself.... is a world concept... and sadly.. a lot of people, I imagine... will go to hell for it.(sigh)

I disagree completely, there is nothing wrong with confidence and I don't see it is a worldly,perhaps you are leaning towards the definition of egotism and not confidence?

 

[Stephen63]

Stilly, I'm curious as to your interpretation of charisma. Surely you're not talking about those who have a 'charismatic' charisma, are you? I know how you feel about Pentecostals and Charismatics, and that you yourself used to be an AOG . Charisma does have the ability to draw crowds. So does anointing. What was seen in the life of Jesus was both. Not that he presented both, but that the eyes of the world interpreted what they saw and heard as either anointed authority or charisma. Much of the modern day church doesn't know the difference either. That's why so many charlatans are drawing them away by the millions. Another thing I see in the modern church is the replacement of anointing with charisma. This gives false prophets and teachers an edge against true Christian leaders, because the church looks at the charisma as something ''better''. I don't think this is an accident. I believe it's a fulfillment of scripture. I don't believe the church realizes these ''itching ear'' teachers have the spiritual ability to draw people away from the true church. Charisma, in the spiritual realm, could also be viewed as a ''false anointing''. If we are gullible enough to think that personal charm is the motivation behind all this, we need to reread the Book. In the book of Acts, Paul had to deal with the soothsayer who was telling the crowds that Barnabas and he were there to teach them the way of salvation.
If a false teacher seems to have a lot of charisma, that may not be charisma he's using. Remember who he's working for.

 

[AAAPlus]

I think the OP brings up a lot of true and valid points. The only thing I'd like to add is that confidence also gives off the impression that you don't need the other person/people, or you're not currently focused on winning their affections. Conversely, if you act unconfident, it shows that you're worried about what your current company thinks of you, that you want them to like you, and that you're not sure if they will. That's why a guy will be fun and outgoing around his friends and then choke when he talks to an attractive girl.

People want what they can't have, and don't want what they can have. It's a basic psychological fact. If someone gives off the impression that others don't like them (unconfidence), people won't want them.

I think as Christians, those of us who are accepted should reach out to those on the outside. New person at your church? Invite them to sit with you, get to know them a bit, and introduce them to some people you know. Make that your ministry for the day. Very few people are confident when they are checking out a church, especially if they are all by themselves. That doesn't mean they aren't worth getting to know.

 

[1still_waters]

con·fi·dence noun \&#712;kän-f&#601;-d&#601;n(t)s, -&#716;den(t)s\

Definition of CONFIDENCE

1
a : a feeling or consciousness of one's powers or of reliance on one's circumstances <had perfect confidence in her ability to succeed> <met the risk with brash confidence>
b : faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way <have confidence in a leader>
2
: the quality or state of being certain : certitude <they had every confidence of success>





Are you saying that people are only confident when accepted in groups? I don't get how being part of a group has bearing on every ones confidence. The word people was used to many times for me to understand who people were in the end.




Being certain of who we are in God, which I think most christians are not sure of , would make all the diifference in how we live. If you as a an individual[general] were confident in your position before the throne of God then you would relate to people humbly and with real authority.

Even in simple things I have doubted myself or what I know and have been fooled by people who were more confident, even if they didn't actually know what they were talking about.

Nice dismantling of argument through detailed definition of said words.

In general, there is a certain maybe, slangy definition of confidence/charisma that many associate with those said words.

So my assertion isn't necessarily addressing the formal dictionary definitions of confidence/charisma, but rather the slangy-ish connotations many associate with those words.

 

[1still_waters]

Stilly, I'm curious as to your interpretation of charisma. Surely you're not talking about those who have a 'charismatic' charisma, are you? I know how you feel about Pentecostals and Charismatics, and that you yourself used to be an AOG . Charisma does have the ability to draw crowds. So does anointing. What was seen in the life of Jesus was both. Not that he presented both, but that the eyes of the world interpreted what they saw and heard as either anointed authority or charisma. Much of the modern day church doesn't know the difference either. That's why so many charlatans are drawing them away by the millions. Another thing I see in the modern church is the replacement of anointing with charisma. This gives false prophets and teachers an edge against true Christian leaders, because the church looks at the charisma as something ''better''. I don't think this is an accident. I believe it's a fulfillment of scripture. I don't believe the church realizes these ''itching ear'' teachers have the spiritual ability to draw people away from the true church. Charisma, in the spiritual realm, could also be viewed as a ''false anointing''. If we are gullible enough to think that personal charm is the motivation behind all this, we need to reread the Book. In the book of Acts, Paul had to deal with the soothsayer who was telling the crowds that Barnabas and he were there to teach them the way of salvation.
If a false teacher seems to have a lot of charisma, that may not be charisma he's using. Remember who he's working for.

This has more to do with personality types, not divine enablings.

 

[djness]

Nice dismantling of argument through detailed definition of said words.

In general, there is a certain maybe, slangy definition of confidence/charisma that many associate with those said words.

So my assertion isn't necessarily addressing the formal dictionary definitions of confidence/charisma, but rather the slangy-ish connotations many associate with those words.

I understand what you are saying here however, it seems lately that when we swim in murkily defined waters participants get swallowed up by aquatic misconstrument sea monsters. I don't like seamonsters.

Lately I have been accused of making assumptions in conversations, and it seems that there is so much of this deviating from what words mean to what we feel like they should mean, its hard to keep up.

So how do you define your use of confidence?

 

[Stephen63]

1 .If it's true, or partially true, what are the implications in how we live for God and relate to people?

2. What does it say about our ability to be easily fooled by confident/charasmatic people?

1.We could conclude that we are fooled by the flesh to follow the herd that's following a psychological manipulator. I have seen some of these in the chat rooms. Usually the confidence in that person is self-confidence, which causes the person to stand out as successful; the truth may be the person is prideful and arrogant. This could also tell us a lot about ourselves, because we're following them.
2. It says we don't have much ability to discern the person, that's for sure. To me, it could mean we don't have spiritual discernment, which is given by God, to show us the truth about people. The modern day church sure could use that.

 

[Zork]

You forgot another obvious thing about confidence. It doesn't matter becaus] someone that is very into sin... can be confident about that.





I don't see the correlation between intelligence and confidence.



http://www.openbible.info/topics/self_confidence 73 bible verses about confidence
I think God actually tells us we need to be confident.



I disagree completely, there is nothing wrong with confidence and I don't see it is a worldly,perhaps you are leaning towards the definition of egotism and not confidence?

First of all, I don't like the tone I used in my last post. It wasn't right. I suppose I'm just erked by how much confidence is prized... when it is like happiness.... it looks good but it, alone (keyword: alone)... shouldn't be valued.

Anyways...I apologize to you and everyone, forgive me.

Hmm, you really didn't understand me.

I also don't see the correlation between intelligence and confidence... I just meant people are fools to value confidence alone. (If you read my post as a whole.. especially the last part, you'll see what I mean, specifically)

(looks at Bible verses)

Well I saw a lot of verses, actually some ones that I liked too. But none, as far as I saw support what you said and instead found that they support what I said. Confidence in God is what matters... not confidence alone or how you put it... in the definition you put up and I imagine the definition most people go by - confidence in yourself.

Confidence alone is confidence in yourself... this exactly what Satan was concerning his story.

Isaiah 14:12-15

12 &#8220;How you are fallen from heaven,
O Lucifer,[a] son of the morning!
How you are cut down to the ground,
You who weakened the nations!
13 For you have said in your heart:
&#8216;I will ascend into heaven,
I will exalt my throne above the stars of God;
I will also sit on the mount of the congregation
On the farthest sides of the north;
14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds,
I will be like the Most High.&#8217;
15 Yet you shall be brought down to Sheol,
To the lowest depths of the Pit.


And yeah, you don't have to agree with me. I think it's clear that it's sinful, both egotism and confidence in yourself.