Unequally Yoked. Part 7

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
T

thefightinglamb

Guest
#1
#1
There has been a lot of threads wrestling the subject I want to discuss here, yet I want to state it as clear as possible.

I have a friend I discussed things today with that was unequally yoked with another. He does not claim to be Christian right now, and she is definitely not, but all the same they were unequally yoked.

She had slept around with many guys, drank a lot of alcohol still, still smokes and smokes marijuana as well, and has a lot of issues that would make them bad companions for each other. My friend does none of these things, though he heard in a wrong way "the forgiveness/blindness" psuedo truth preached to him.

I too have had relationships (not dating relationships) with women that were unequally yoked or imbalanced. I kept using forgiveness like a VISA card that had no limit on them...but in truth, I was blinding myself to the fact that we were not equally yoked.

What does unequally yoked mean? I believe it means that you see eye to eye, both in past, present and future matters. God does not change like shifting shadows, and he sees our lives as completed from the beginning...and as so, if we are to marry, the LORD also has set apart our spouses so that we can be equally yoked and "true partners."

I just want to emphasize that there is a reason for the way you are the way you are and God meant for you to be that way. Likewise, with your spouse, God will have set them apart as He has set you apart.

There is true forgiveness and there is false forgiveness. True forgiveness leads the way to holiness. False forgiveness is like it says in Jude? about making a license for sin and debauchery.

I feel abashed that so many Christians are willing to make an excuse for sin instead of standing up for holiness.

If God has made you a certain way, you have every right to expect that of your spouse. If He kept you safe, He will keep them safe as well. This applies to everything from drugs, alcohol, sex, and every other debauchery..

God bless
tony
 
Last edited:
J

Jullianna

Guest
#2
#2
I'm not in agreement with everything set out above, but over the past couple of years I have come to realize that being unequally yoked means far more than whether someone is a christian or not. Understanding this has made me far more patient with regard to wanting a relationship with someone.

Not everyone is on the same spiritual maturity level. This may not be a big deal if the guy is more spiritually mature, but it's HUGE for a woman who will be expecting a man to take the lead.

Not everyone has the same experience with relationships. Some men/women are uncomfortable being with someone who has more experience in dealing with the opposite sex.

Not everyone is on the same income level. Some guys are uncomfortable being with a woman with a higher salary.

Not everyone has the same level of life experience. Some people have seen and had to do an awful lot of very difficult things in their lives (being a solder/cop, dealing with difficult family situations, critical life and death struggles). It's very difficult apparently for someone who has never had to face such things to understand the effect they can have on a person, both positively and negatively.

It intimidates and/or scares a LOT of guys when they find out that I was a cop. I think it's because they have a lot of preconceived notions that female cops are manly somehow. That's probably why cops usually marry other cops... And...I don't want to be with a guy who will expect ME to take the lead or play momma to him.

There's something else that comes to mind after reading the above post. As far as the forgiveness thing, this passage comes to mind:

LUKE 7:

36Now one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him, so he went to the Pharisee’s house and reclined at the table. 37When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, 38and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.
39When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is—that she is a sinner.”
40Jesus answered him, “Simon, I have something to tell you.”
“Tell me, teacher,” he said.
41&#8220;Two men owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii,d and the other fifty.</SPAN> 42Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he canceled the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?&#8221;</SPAN>
43Simon replied, &#8220;I suppose the one who had the bigger debt canceled.&#8221;
&#8220;You have judged correctly,&#8221; Jesus said.
44Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, &#8220;Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet.</SPAN> 46You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet.</SPAN> 47Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven&#8212;for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.&#8221;</SPAN>

I don't know about anyone else, but from what I've seen, those who've not led sheltered lives tend to be more forgiving, understanding and appreciative of the forgiveness of God and others. Seems like Jesus saw the same thing....

As far as righteousness is concerned, we have none in and of ourselves. Any righteousness we may have is in and through the work and blood of Christ alone, who is transforming us ALL daily to be more like Him. Some are simply farther along in the molding process than others. That doesn't give those who APPEAR to be farther along the right to judge or condemn those they may perceive to be less so, as this may be far from the case. God sees impurities that we do not, especially in ourselves.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Ritter

Ritter

Banned
#3
Jul 25, 2005
2,417
34
0
#3
My parents were egging me into asking out this nice Christian girl recently. She is very sweet, beautiful, and would say yes if I asked her out, but I there is just something that stands in the way of my asking her out, and I think it is knowledge of the fact that I will be unequally yoked in a way.

I do not buy the idea of a soul mate, but I understand where the idea can take hold. We do have a certain essence to us that cries out for someone that exhibits a similar sort of essence. You can't really describe it in words, it is a feeling, a picture. Something familiar but at the same time alien.
 
R

Relena7

Guest
#4
#4
I know this isn't the main point of the OP...but not all people who aren't Christian go crazy with drugs, sex, or crimes. Just sayin.
 
Ritter

Ritter

Banned
#5
Jul 25, 2005
2,417
34
0
#5
Relena7 said:
I know this isn't the main point of the OP...but not all people who aren't Christian go crazy with drugs, sex, or crimes. Just sayin.
Click to expand...
In the words of my non-christian boss.

"Ya booze ya lose."
 
B

brokenxangel

Guest
#6
#6
Im not gonna pretend to be knowledgable of the Bible or philosophy but reading that OP about " God made you the way you are," struck a cord with me. Im military and since day one of basic were taught to be strong fighters who have confidence in ourselves and everything we do. I lift weights competetivly and im proud of my results. I love to rock out screamo music and rock music when im workin out whos lyrics arent really christian. S basically im self centered, proud, loud mouthed, and ready to fight at the drop of a hat. Im not really boosting just being honest because I want Gods Grace, guidance, mercy and forgivness. I also dont want to use that' " God made you the way you are," as a liscence to sin. Do I have to make a whole 360 degree turnaround to be saved? I mean im a christian and i was saved about 6 years ago...but I feel I have strayed. Ive read the bible but cant recite verses but I want to be saved. Im a decent human being and spiritualy I learn what I can when I can. I dont understand alot of the bible talk about living in Gods image and how his Laws for being a good christian are set in stone and do not waiver for anybody or anything. I may be rambling but this has been an issue with me for while. I cant seem to communicate or even relate to ppl with a higher understanding then me. Please help me!!
 
Oncefallen

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
#7
Jan 15, 2011
6,031
3,270
113
#7
Brokenxangel, I think that scripture is clear that Salvation is a one time event when we surrender our will to God. However Sanctification is a lifelong process of becoming who He wants us to be. Although I have seen some people who's lives were dramatically changed overnight when they got saved, I think for most it is a lifelong struggle of daily surrendering our will to His. We all have our issues that cause us to be less than what God would have for us to be, but with His strength we can become the person that He wants us to be.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#8
#8
brokenxangel, you are a bright guy and you're headed the right way! :)

If you are having trouble understanding the Bible, please find a version you can understand a little better. Some are far easier than others. :) I like the NIV or the New King James Version. Don't give up. :)

Also, please read the New Testament before you read the Old Testament. If you don't, a lot of the Old Testament might not make sense, it might seem like a bunch of rules and you might get the wrong idea about some things until you read the whole thing. I made that mistake. :)

We love having you here. We are ALL works in process. Every single one of us. None of us have it all down yet.

Hang with us. Stick around. We'd be happy to answer any questions we can. :) God bless!
 
B

brokenxangel

Guest
#9
#9
thank you julliana! that makes alot of sense and actually put me at ease! i know i come off a little harsh to some ppl here...but im trying! i dont know how many infractions will get u booted from here...but i dont want that! i like the atmosphere here for the most part...
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#10
#10
We all come off a little harsh sometimes because it's tougher to convey our thoughts in print. People can't hear our tone or see our facial expressions.. which is why I tend to use a lot of emoticons. :)

Just don't give up no matter what! Even if something happens and you get the boot. Don't give up!!! Find a good church and hang on tightly to God! :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.