What is love?

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S

Seth

Guest
#1
Baby don't hurt me... don't hurt me... no more.



Hehe. Song's wayyy too catchy.



But onto the main topic.

I'm a newbie when it comes to love. I can't say I know what it is, I can't say I've ever experienced it, and I can't say that I know what it's caused from. So, I post this thread in the hopes that someone more experienced in the topic could give me a tip or two about it.

There's a few brain tickler's that I can't seem to wrap my head around, though.

If love is unconditional, then why is it that so many people are so careful about who they choose as partners? Setting certain requirements for a person to reach before they are dating material. This just seems to contradict itself so much. Wouldn't this mean that as soon as those requirements weren't met, the love would end? That would certainly explain a lot of ruined relationships.

We know the symptoms of being on love, but what's the cause of it? I don't mean physical attraction or anything like that. I mean genuine love. The kind that keeps two people together regardless of what either of them do. Is it something beyond what humans are able to grasp?

Certainly, there's certain parts of it that contribute to the feeling of love. But, most of those emotions are mistaken for it. Like, infatuation, physical attraction, the mystery of the person... All of which are very fleeting. Do any of those things have any place in real love?

Is love mutual, or can it be a one-way-thing? I suppose this would go hand in hand with the cause of it. But, the question still remains. Can someone unconditionally love someone who doesn't love them back?

That's all I can think of for now.
Don't make fun of me too much for asking, eh? :p
 
F

Finny101

Guest
#2
From what I have seen in my life..... for your question "why is it that so many people are so careful about who they choose as partners?" depends a lot on the person. If they had prior relationships where it didn't end well, or what traits they didn't like in the person (not always physically sometimes mentally but for an ex. someone who is vain). For the second part of that question "soon as those requirements weren't met, the love would end?" Sometimes people over look faults or make exceptions for that other person.

I can only answer your first question.

(I've seen that movie lol)
 
T

The-Prodical-Son

Guest
#3
The thing is, if you aren't careful and just go for anyone, you're going to have to spend the rest of your life with them. And you either get divorced or have a very unhappy marriage. Not pleasant. :/
Also Look at Jesus on the cross, His love was unconditional but many people don't feel the same way back so yes it is possible. But yeah, i'd wait for a long while yet :)

God bless
 
F

Finny101

Guest
#4
The thing is, if you aren't careful and just go for anyone, you're going to have to spend the rest of your life with them. And you either get divorced or have a very unhappy marriage. Not pleasant. :/
Also Look at Jesus on the cross, His love was unconditional but many people don't feel the same way back so yes it is possible. But yeah, i'd wait for a long while yet :)

God bless
That was a good example about Jesus love was unconditional. I was thinking bout cheating how one person could be totally into the relationship while the other one is looking in a different direction.
 
T

The-Prodical-Son

Guest
#5
Cheers :) I sort o' used the extreme :D
 
S

Seth

Guest
#6
From what I have seen in my life..... for your question "why is it that so many people are so careful about who they choose as partners?" depends a lot on the person. If they had prior relationships where it didn't end well, or what traits they didn't like in the person (not always physically sometimes mentally but for an ex. someone who is vain). For the second part of that question "soon as those requirements weren't met, the love would end?" Sometimes people over look faults or make exceptions for that other person.
I used that first bit you quoted in an attempt to show the contradiction between what I know is love, and what humans tend to do seeking their partners. What I'm puzzled about is how a person can love their mother, father, sisters, brothers, and best friends regardless of what they are... How God's love is unconditional and never-ending... and yet the love that couples share is based on physical attraction, respect, and compatibility in their personal views.

Just seems like a bit of an oxymoron.

However, I do understand what you're getting at. I could see how someone could be disinterested in a person who has distasteful traits in their looks and personalities.

The thing is, if you aren't careful and just go for anyone, you're going to have to spend the rest of your life with them. And you either get divorced or have a very unhappy marriage. Not pleasant. :/
Also Look at Jesus on the cross, His love was unconditional but many people don't feel the same way back so yes it is possible. But yeah, i'd wait for a long while yet :)

God bless
Yeah.

But, the oxymoron remains unsolved. Consider this statement as a whole:

"If love is unconditional, then why are humans careful about who they select as their partners?"

I love my siblings unconditionally. God loves humans unconditionally. Yet, the romantic sort of love is dependent on physical appearance, shared views, and mutual interest. Logic would dictate that any kind of love that's based on such conditions would end when those conditions were no longer met. I'm certain there's more to it than this.

-

I cannot identify with how Jesus felt on the cross in my present state of mind. I cannot understand it, though I am thankful for it.
 
K

Kyouken

Guest
#7
Personally, I wouldn't date someone who isn't Christian. I assume you get that, though.
I do know that God's kind of love involves hate. Hating everything that's coming against the thing He loves. If we're to truly love someone, we ought to hate everything that's coming against them to injure/kill them.

And by
"If love is unconditional, then why are humans careful about who they select as their partners?",
there seem to be different kinds of love, although the only love I want to know is God's unconditional love. People have preferences, and blah blah blah, some people are just lusting over a person, blah blah blah. My preference is that they're Christian, because whether I like it or not, God comes first EVERYWHERE.

If we're to truly love someone, we need to know them. When I say know, I mean know in the sense that the KJV uses it - know meaning 'to know intimately'. While it's used mostly to say sexual intercourse, there are verses that tell us we need to know God. In that context, it definitely doesn't mean sexual intercourse. We ought to know that special person like we ought to know God. I wish I could expand on that more, but I need to study it more. I don't know if this helps you at all, though.

An example of some unconditional love for you:
This woman who didn't believe in God met a man in the store who proclaimed to be God and told her lots of things about her that a stranger would not know, maybe even a friend. He told her to go out with him - she did, and they eventually got married. Now, this guy was a Baptist Deacon if I remember correctly (if he wasn't then he was active in the church somehow). However, at night, he 'went out of his body' and went into a wolf or something. He was heavily influenced by demonic activity. During their marriage, this guy beat the crap out of her. He poured hot oil over her head to name something. Eventually she came to know the Lord. After she knew the Lord, she was filing for the divorce, and she had told a couple people, including a pastor. Everyone encouraged the divorce, and the pastor said it was alright to since the guy was violating scripture.
However, the pastor also said something else - he told this woman something about loving him (I don't remember exactly what; I wish I did though). Despite everyone else's warnings, this woman stayed with that man. Something changed, though - the next time that guy went to attack her (he had a knife visible), she didn't cower. The guy asked her if she was afraid or something, and she said something involving God. He stated that her God was bigger than his god, dropped the knife, and said, "Well, if you really love me, go make me a sandwich." She made him a sandwich. They went to counseling, and this guy just blasted her, saying she did all those horrible things to him, and she didn't say a thing. She didn't even counter what he said. Eventually, this guy came to know the Lord as well, and they've been together ever since.

I may have missed some of the details in that story, and it may seem far-fetched, but that happened. If that's not unconditional love, I'm not sure what is, Seth.

EDIT: People one way love God all the time.
 
A

apples

Guest
#8
Love: (verb) Always seeking to do the best for the object of that love

.
 
J

jesusnme

Guest
#9
im definetly not 'more experiened' ..... my mum left my dad when i was 6 so im not a big fan of the big L word my self. with 50% of marriages ending in divorce and so on.....

it groses me out to see people all lovey dovey with eachother but maybe we will all understand one day.
 

Calmador

Senior Member
Jun 23, 2011
945
40
28
#10
Baby don't hurt me... don't hurt me... no more.



Hehe. Song's wayyy too catchy.



But onto the main topic.

I'm a newbie when it comes to love. I can't say I know what it is, I can't say I've ever experienced it, and I can't say that I know what it's caused from. So, I post this thread in the hopes that someone more experienced in the topic could give me a tip or two about it.

There's a few brain tickler's that I can't seem to wrap my head around, though.

If love is unconditional, then why is it that so many people are so careful about who they choose as partners? Setting certain requirements for a person to reach before they are dating material. This just seems to contradict itself so much. Wouldn't this mean that as soon as those requirements weren't met, the love would end? That would certainly explain a lot of ruined relationships.

We know the symptoms of being on love, but what's the cause of it? I don't mean physical attraction or anything like that. I mean genuine love. The kind that keeps two people together regardless of what either of them do. Is it something beyond what humans are able to grasp?

Certainly, there's certain parts of it that contribute to the feeling of love. But, most of those emotions are mistaken for it. Like, infatuation, physical attraction, the mystery of the person... All of which are very fleeting. Do any of those things have any place in real love?

Is love mutual, or can it be a one-way-thing? I suppose this would go hand in hand with the cause of it. But, the question still remains. Can someone unconditionally love someone who doesn't love them back?

That's all I can think of for now.
Don't make fun of me too much for asking, eh? :p

Your in doubt and in wonder because you forgot God.

The source of love is God, and true love comes from him.

Why do people set standards, if love is unconditional. That one is because people don't understand true love like God does. God loves all, nomatter what, his willing to forgive, love and accept people as horrible as Hitler if such a person accepts God's true love.

God as for as I can tell, has shown us this love, in his actions, in scripture.

However since your talking about choosing someone, meaning your talking about human beings.

Well thats a different story, God is so easy on us. And I'm glad, he understands that we don't understand.

So when God talks about marriage and choosing someone... as far as I have read, his general but puts critical barriers. We should marry and choose christian husbands/wives according to who you are, man or woman.

That's all, the rest is up to us... do I want to marry a christian girl who is very much into art? Maybe into the same sport Iam into... in the end I think it wont matter so much when we put God's principles into practice. But you know, thats why God wants us to marry other christains cause he can work through us... and through us... work on our marriage.

God doesn't expect you to complete his standards but I think he does expect you to WANT to complete his standards.

I think thats also why he wasn't specific, and only gave us those guidelines, marry other christians, because of his standards.

Last questions, yeah I think it's clear anyone can love anyone, doesn't have to be mutual. I can love a girl, and she can not love me. I don't see why it can't be that way.

Not sure if that covers everything, but hopefully that helps, God Bless
 
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B

brianjwma

Guest
#11
LOVE IS SACRIFICE...dont let the world sugar coat it for you...
 
S

Seraphotic

Guest
#12
There is a Passage tha explana it.. I'll try and give it to u later, I got school lol