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Guy's, I really need your help. I'm in the middle of an argument with my wife and she just flat out told me that i'm right... What on earth do I do next?!!

I bought my wife a Pug as a present. Despite the squashed nose, bulging eyes, and rolls of fat, the dog seems to like her.

Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven. Van Damme: I'll be Mozart. Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it. Just say It!!!

Took me a while to get the first one. What does that say about me? Oh dear.

I can't see any used/unused batteries

Just been reading a recent study on how crows signal each other when eating road kill. They found that some crows stay in the trees and warn those feeding of coming traffic. However, they noticed a large number of crows being killed on main roads. What they found is that crows can shout "CAR...

"I went to the zoo the other day. It was awful. They only had one animal. It was a dog. It was a shih tzu.

Seriously delayed in the airport, as a woman has completely passed out on the Baggage Carousel! She's slowly coming around now.

Just been hospitalised due to a peak-a-boo accident. They’ve put me in ICU.

It took me a while to get it.

I was pulled over by a Police Traffic Officer. He looked at my license and said, "you're supposed to be wearing glasses". I said I have contacts. He said he didn't care who I know.