Perhaps, but there shouldn't be.
I don't mean to sound disrespectful or contentious, but I'd honestly have to disagree with you here. I've seen hatred manifest in people a multitude of times in my life that was definitely on the same level as murder in that the one manifesting the same wished the other party to be dead. In fact (and I'm not joking), my own wife hates me in that manner, so I don't need to look outside of my own home (if one can call it that) to see the same.
Is it possible that people aren't seeing a distinction between "society" and "the church" which ought to exist? IOW, is there a difference between the way that "society" judges and the way that "the church" judges and if not, then why not? Show me anywhere in the New Testament where saints are instructed to kill anybody. Again, Christians are supposed to be following Christ. He set the standard, in my estimation, as to who is worthy to administer "capital punishment" when He said "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone" (John 8:7). As I mentioned earlier, there is only One Person Who meets that criteria and He was present that day and He didn't condemn the woman whom the law required be put to death, but instead He told her to "go and sin no more". Do Jesus' words matter anymore? Have they ever?
I could answer that question, but I won't. Again, I wouldn't have to look outside of my home for an example.
Again, I believe that this question is predicated upon a failure to properly distinguish between "society" and "the church". If the victim's family calls for vengeance, then must the Christian do the same?
Why'd you have to mention BarlyGurl? We're friends (I think), but she might not be too thrilled with me at the moment. Anyhow, to answer your question, you're only accountable for your own actions. If I wrong BarlyGurl (and live to tell about it...lol...jk), then the choice is hers and hers alone as to whether or not to forgive. This conversation started in relation to jurors and the like. If I was called as a juror, then I'd personally never opt for "capital punishment". I'd seek to share the gospel with the perpetrator if possible and if not possible, then I'd pray for God to send somebody to them to share the gospel with them. If God wanted the person killed, then I'm sure that some inmate would be willing to do His bidding, but I'm not into taking anybody's life. Ultimately, it's a matter of conscience, I suppose, and we'll all give an account for our own personal decisions. I don't know what else to say...