Be careful little mouth what you say

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Aephus

Aephus

Member
#1
Jun 14, 2016
194
141
43
#1
Hey everyone.

How do you deal with gossip/slander/backbiting coming from someone else? Like, say for example you’re talking to someone and they start to or say you’re at work in a group for a task with two other people and they start to talk bad about a client or customer. How do you respond/address the situation? I can identify it when it is happening, and I disagree with it, but I’m not sure how to combat it always. I’m also in the process of overcoming being non-confrontational.

Any stories or wisdom is greatly appreciated.

Thank you guys!
 
M

mar09

Senior Member
#2
Sep 17, 2014
4,927
1,259
113
#2
Hi aephus,
It's not very easy for me to reply to what u ask. But i have times when i visit a person, wanting to help or encourage, and she starts venting or telling abt how a young child is so 'disobedient,' or her mother in law, this or that. Sometimes i just try to divert the talk and say why doesnt she try to be more grateful and see the good side of a child who cannot even understand yet how to meet her (unrealistic) expectations, or unpleasant experiences w/ the in-law was in the past and not to dwell on that, etc. I was kind of non-confrontational also, but am now praying abt it when i have to confront some people. I just heard (on radio) the verse on speaking to/rebuking someone in love, rather than keeping silent when we have to say something as when we have to correct false or erroneous perceptions, whether at home, in church, at work. (Ah, and if it would help, ive started to add in a bit of humor to my msg, as in a reminder/rebuke msg to family.) Gossiping is never acceptable, but not telling what the Lord leads us to say may also not help. Just pray when ur prompted to speak, what the Lord would have you say.
 
Krumbeard

Krumbeard

Well-known member
#3
Apr 15, 2019
1,097
730
113
#3
I have to say, I like the title of this thread.

Although too many times I'm guilty of this. It is something that my wife and I realized a number of years ago that we were doing about others in the family. We tried to make it a point to not talk to others about those things. Yet, we still fell to the temptation at times.

Also, as the old saying goes, sorta "Words once spoken are like eggs broken ".

I've said many things I regret. Some here on CC. I cannot take them back. I've hurt others with my words, sometimes purposely, sometimes just being dumb/ silly. But the damage is done.
Be careful little brain what you think.
 
love_comes_softly

love_comes_softly

Well-known member
#4
Feb 13, 2019
768
822
93
#4
Aephus said:
Hey everyone.

How do you deal with gossip/slander/backbiting coming from someone else? Like, say for example you’re talking to someone and they start to or say you’re at work in a group for a task with two other people and they start to talk bad about a client or customer. How do you respond/address the situation? I can identify it when it is happening, and I disagree with it, but I’m not sure how to combat it always. I’m also in the process of overcoming being non-confrontational.

Any stories or wisdom is greatly appreciated.

Thank you guys!
Click to expand...
This is challenging indeed. I always try not to take place in it, which can be difficult. If I can't shift the conversation, then I actually physically leave the conversation. Sometimes it's not the appropriate time to outright say, "we shouldn't be talking about this or this person", so I find it's best to leave. The person or people will likely catch on if you start leaving multiple conversations.
 
Leastamongmany

Leastamongmany

Well-known member
#5
Jun 2, 2019
3,270
1,269
113
Usa
#5
love_comes_softly said:
This is challenging indeed. I always try not to take place in it, which can be difficult. If I can't shift the conversation, then I actually physically leave the conversation. Sometimes it's not the appropriate time to outright say, "we shouldn't be talking about this or this person", so I find it's best to leave. The person or people will likely catch on if you start leaving multiple conversations.
Click to expand...
Absolutely! My worst flaw!
 
Mezame83

Mezame83

Well-known member
#7
Mar 18, 2019
291
316
63
#7
It depends who it is and how well I know them but regardless of who it is I always try my best to speak with respect.

The girls at bible study sometimes go off track, I could be in a different room, I come in the room and they go silent, it's a dead set give away they've been talking nonsense, they go silent though because they know I won't tolerate it. If I do hear it, I'm quick to cut it off and say something along the lines of, "let's pray for them."

At work or among non believers it can be difficult but for me, from the get go I let people know I don't tolerate gossip from the first time they try gossiping to me about someone. I find if I do it from the get go they are less likely to try again.
I understand not everyone can do that, if you can't I agree with what others have said, just walk away and pray.

Discern what's really behind the gossip. Wherever we are, we have to be a light in the darkness.

Blessings!
 
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