Daughter won't go to church

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M

mcap

Guest
#1
My daughter refuses to attend church unless her friends are with her.Her "friends" rarely go so she stays home most Sundays.Our church is full of young people and I know If she gives it a chance she will enjoy it.What do I do?I don't want to force her to go. God bless
 
D

Dragoon9

Guest
#2
Hi MCAP,

Could I ask... why is going to church the focus?

Church is a wonderful and necessary place in the life of a believer, but it is not the central place. The central place is Christ being our Lord each and every moment.

Might I suggest that you make God's joy, love and obedience to His word a more complete part of your family's (and your own) every waking moment. Think upon and discuss His teachings in relation to every aspect of your lives. Draw closer to Him every waking and sleeping moment. Be joyful in both adversity and in good times, not because the times are good, but because God is good. Sing His praises. Pray on all occassions. Love those who are your neighbours and your enemies. Follow the Lord your God.

No matter how much they deny it, our children desire to be like their parents. If you draw near to God, your daughter will follow you.

As your daughter draws closer to God, she will naturally desire to go to church. But at that point though, it will no longer really be an issue.
 
W

walkinnlite

Guest
#3
Years ago I became a christian because of my boyfriends mother...He lived out in the country side, so if we wanted to see each other on weekends one of us would stay over at the others house. His moms rule was if you are going to be here for the weekend then I was to come to church with the rest of the family. Her husband didn't attend...But all of us kids went with her. I didn't pay much attention to the service, I was there because of my boyfriend. I had never been to a church like that though. His sister invited us to some different kinds of activities, one was a revival meeting. We both went forward at that meeting.
I had the opportunity to meet the whole family again just a few months ago. The 3 girls and their family are walking with the Lord. The 3 boys are not, they went the way of their father...he drank. My momma Young is still alive and doing well. It was wonderful to see her and to have the opportunity to tell her that I am a believer because of her influence.
Wish I had the answer for you, my children are not walking with the Lord, but I am still in their life, perhaps I will have the chance to worship and praise our Lord with them yet...
Hope this is somewhat encouraging.
 
May 22, 2009
36
0
0
#4
How old is your daughter?
It will be good if you can give her some incentive on her every single visit to the Church. You are her Father and would know her weaknesses. So follow the trick, and it will benefit her.
 

iwant2serve

Senior Member
Apr 12, 2009
513
28
28
#5
I wonder why your daughter does not want to go to church. Have you tried to talk to her about it? if not, then that is the thing to start with. Somtimes as parents we neglect to listen to our children when they talk to us by making our own opnion the center point. Are her friends saved and filled with the Holy Spirit? Do the young people at your church do a lot of activities? There can be many reasons why she does not want to go. Try to find out then pray and ask God for a way to answer her. As I often ask does our lives show the love of Christ and live Christ like in front of our children. Because they know better that ony one else how we as are as parents.
 
R

Raeshelle

Guest
#6
How old is your daughter? In our house growing up we was told as long as you live under my roof you will be going to church when there is service unless you are sick.. We was not forced to have be a christian but we always went out of respect for our Dad. It never hurt any of us and if you ask 7 of us kids you will maybe get one who will said I hated it.. Even though 2 are not serving God, one will complain about being made to go to church. The other one will say she is glad of it because it has helped her to make wise decisions.. So making her go to church is not a big issue.. I know my kids know that church is important.. My Son went with me until he moved out on his own and even when he came home to visit he got ready to go to church without being asked.. Thank God he is not attending church on his own with his wife and son.. He thanks me for making him go when he didn't want to. My Daughter well she loves God and can't wait to go to church.
 
Z

zeromantic

Guest
#7
I agree with Rae. My house, my rules. Skipping church is non optional. Sorry, but that's what worked for me as a kid and it will work today. Leaving this choice up to kids abdicates parental authority and responsibility...
 
B

become_the_generation

Guest
#8
A post I can respond to! Yay! Right in my age focus. I deal with these kinds of people in youth and college ministry all the time. She may not feel comfortable going to a large church service where theres a bunch of "religious people", even if they are her age. She wants community, she wants to feel loved, she wants to be heard. Why else do you think that she would go if her friends went?

So talk to students there that are her age. Have them just talk to her if they go to the same school as her or whatever. She wants to see that people care first, before she jumps in. If there is a fun event that the youth group is doing, have THEM invite her, NOT YOU. But if its only a normal youth group meeting, maybe hold off a couple of weeks. Have the students there just care about her and love on her when they see her everyday, which is how it should be anyways. She might feel more comfortable at a smaller group rather than at a church event or church service because she might not feel like she is "surrounded by weirdos or hypocrites" Then have them invite her after awhile, but the most important thing is PLUGGING HER IN!!! If she does decide to start to hang out with a youth group, let her become part of it! If she has a role, even if its something like saying hi to students as they come in, or even just telling her that you(a student) wants to sit down with her and ask her what she wants to see at the youth group or things changed at the youth group. She will feel like she is part of te youth group right away, because she IS. well theres my advice for today! God Bless! hope it helped :) have an amazinggg day everybody!!!
 
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become_the_generation

Guest
#9
I agree with Rae. My house, my rules. Skipping church is non optional. Sorry, but that's what worked for me as a kid and it will work today. Leaving this choice up to kids abdicates parental authority and responsibility...

Nothing against you, I know that that worked for you, but...that will generally not work today. Teens will rebel. If they are forced to do something, its not as effective. Trust me, I'm 19. I was just there what she is doing a couple years ago. She will get a bad taste of what Christianity is, which is LOVE.