Mature audience please

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
C

carpetmanswife

Guest
#1
ok not that it matters in my case anymore but id like to hear others opinions on this topic , sharing birth control options with your children or not or better yet taking them to get birthcontrol yourself ,of course we teach them abstinence , but logically in my opinion some , not all certainly , just wont listen to the abstinence arguement so would it be wrong to take them to get protected? would they take that as a " go ahead" ? i have personal feelings on this but would love others feedback,
 
1

1Corinthians13

Guest
#2
CMW, some may disagree with me but I think it's a smart idea to take our children for birth control. Of course we hope they will listen to, understand and abide to the abstinence argument. Still we have to think of the child that would be brought into this world if they don't, since abortion is not only evil and of course murder, but just not an option. Some may take it as a go ahead but we hope the values and faith have been instilled in our children by our teaching.

Many if not all doctors will reiterate to the teen that by issuing birth control they are not giving the teen the go ahead.
 
T

Tessa

Guest
#3
well I feel that we yes should teach abstinence but being realistic that they may not heed that but feel that taking them to get B/C is moraly wrong also number one the pill is not a preventative it actually aborts before you even know. planned parenthood the Grand Deception by GEO. Grant is excellent reading and will provide much info on this subject plus be a real eye opener for many. I realize also that the consequence of poor judgement of our children is factor but still not a reason to help them in doing wrong. We need to make our stand because we are Christians and teach them what is right but to help them find a differnt way is wrong.
 
N

NazariteNation

Guest
#4
Under a normal set of circumstances, I can understand why a parent would consider placing their teen age daughter on birth control. Especially one with a tendency to act out in rebellion however, after watching an interview with a former abortion clinic owner who has since become a christian, I would never trust my child in there care.

I have a video recording of a former teen pregnancy counselor from Dallas Texas who, since being saved, has admitted that she had actually went into business with a doctor and opened an abortion clinic then used her job as a counselor to generate more business thus pushing abortion over birth control. However, here's the scariest part of them all... she actually admitted that it was a common practice to prescribe birth control pills that required the user to have to take them daily knowing that a teen girl would would not follow the directions exactly as prescribed thus the girl would end up pregnant and generating more business.

Can you believe that?
 
K

Kyra

Guest
#5
Wow!! That's crazy and I completely believe it.
 
T

Topher

Guest
#6
I have to agree with Tessa here. The way the pills work is to convince your body its already pregnant. Most of the time this means that it just blocks the release of eggs from the ovaries. Should an egg be released and fertilized, however, your body will abort the embryo when it attaches to the uterine wall.

So, basically, using hormonal birth control as your sole means of preventing pregnancy results in a young baby being aborted once in a while. This is why a lot of doctors have qualms about prescribing birth control.

As for whether or not it increases promiscuity, I can only speak for myself here. I've always had trouble remaining chaste. I've dated a couple of girls on birth control, and it's always been way harder to keep from taking things too far. Just saying that it's wise to consider the impact on her significant other, should he find out she's on birth control.
 
L

lil-rush

Guest
#7
If your child isn’t going to listen to reason it is not your responsibility to promote promiscuity by putting that child on birth control. If I go out and have sex and get pregnant while living under my parents’ roof that is my fault, and not my parents. They are under no obligation whatsoever to put me on birth control just so I can have one more excuse to lead a sinful life.

Sin is not inevitable. Everyone has the free will to chose not to sin. Putting your child on birth control is telling that child sin IS inevitable, and the only way to deal with sin is to lessen the consequences of it. Putting your child on birth control can also create a trust issue. You are in essence saying, “I have told you that fornication is sin, but I don’t trust you enough to listen to what I say, so I am putting you on birth control so that if you have sex you won’t get pregnant.”
 
L

lil-rush

Guest
#8
Yeppers. My dad raised us kids to take responsibilty for our actions, and not blame others when we make stupid mistakes that are our own fault. Now that my sister and I are in college my dad says that if we get pregnant we can move out, and find somewhere else to live(we still live at home and just commute to college. A very smart finicial move if I may say so myself. hehe). He will still love us, but if we want to do stupid things he will not condone such actions under his roof. I think giving a child an ultimatum is a better way to dissuade them from sin than to give them birth control. I wouldn't be fornicating either way, but for those who do have the desire to fornicate tough love works better than leniency.

On the topic of giving birth control as a means for cramps(never heard of giving it for acne. that seems kinda silly to me) I don't think it would result in any abortions if the person takes their birth control regularly. Which I imagine a person who is trying to avoid debilitating cramps would make sure to take their birth control religiously in order to avoid the pain.
 
N

NoahsMom

Guest
#9
I have actually had this TALK with both my teenage daughters, and while i explained to them I would be very angry probably if they did come to me asking to be put on birth control because they were sexually active, I would still listen and try not to choke them out. JK. All mothers think this way at one time or other, you want them to make the right choices, however, sometimes this isnt always the case. Now, keep in mind, when we had this TALK, I explained WHY sex before marriage was wrong, not just because the Bible says so, but because its a blood covenant your makin with another human being for the rest of life, and I also explained how seriously God takes these vows, hoping to make them realize, this was a BIG, IMPORTANT step, and you cant take it back, or wish it away. I also explained birth control was not 100% accurate, against pregnancy, or disease, so Im hopin I got the message across.So far, so good.
 
Aug 27, 2005
1,282
12
38
34
#10
Hmmm. Personally I would definitely not take my daughter to get birth control or my son to get condoms. My mom can be quite crazy at times and offered to put me on birth control for one of the two options Merry talked about...but i refused...i felt as though that was like telling people...yah I have sex. I didn't want that assumption going around. I want to only teach abstinence in my home. Don't you think that schools hit the other areas pretty well? *sigh* People in my highschool were trying to get a petition started where they only taught safe-sex and no abstinence at all! And abstinence is really important to me anyway.
 
1

1Corinthians13

Guest
#11
Well put Lilrush. There are other circumstances where a girl may be put on birth control for imbalance or severe acne (I wondered about that when Topher mentioned "So, basically, using hormonal birth control as your sole means of preventing pregnancy results in a young baby being aborted once in a while. This is why a lot of doctors have qualms about prescribing birth control.)

In the end if you are raising your children the best you know how and they stray from the Godly upbringing then I agree they have to take responsibility and learn from it and know once again God loves them and forgives them.

My mom put me on it for imbalance. Either that or be the youngest person to have a hysterectomy. She was very clear she wasn't putting me on it for the use it was created for. Just to clarify.
 
1

1Corinthians13

Guest
#12
yeah i know Merry.

with so many new medications on the market now, i am hoping doctors will provide moms with other options to straighten out their daughters health issues. As for my mom, I was in a horrible state and she knew it and it was her way of fixing my tummy. I still got the abstinence talk often. She was a good mama....
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#13
There are two worlds, the ideal perfect one where everything goes right and the less than ideal world.

Most of us live in the less than ideal world and we do things to compensate for it. We do things like wear seat belts, get health insurance, fire insurance and so on. Why? Because even though we're trying our best, we know this world is not ideal. So what am I getting at?

Abstinence is the ideal. That should be taught. We should teach children about God's best for their lives. That involves waiting for marriage. Parents must teach this with blood earnest passion and conviction.

At the same time there should be a realization that this isn't an ideal world. Parents must realize that sometimes stuff happens. Does this mean putting them on the pill or handing out condoms to your children? Nope it doesn't mean that.

I think Christian parents sometimes forget that this isn't an ideal world and that sometimes no matter how hard you teach the ways of God, sometimes kids just stray from the path. I'm not saying parents should give their kids birth control because of this, I'm just saying let's temper our idealistic expectations with the realization we live in a non-ideal world.

And handing out birth control may prevent a pregnancy, but it violates God's ideal teaching we should give to our children. Some may say that we shouldn't be so idealistic that we allow our kids to be in a situation they become pregnant.

Instead of handing our kids an imperfect teaching like telling them to use birth control, we can extend to them love, forgiveness and acceptance if they do make a mistake and become pregnant.

The neat thing about our faith is that we have many sets of ideals to live up to. One ideal is to abstain before marriage. Another ideal is to accept, forgive and love when people fail to meet those ideals.

So to sum this up, parents ought to teach the ideal of abstinence with blood earnest passion, but if that fails, then display the other ideal of love, forgiveness and acceptance. There is nothing ideal about handing kids birth control. There is plenty ideal about teaching your kids right values and accepting and forgiving them when or if they do wrong.
 
Last edited:
B

bazilla

Guest
#14
For real though....USA for sure is a nation that promotes sex. Its in our commercials, music, shows, movies. etc. So I think at a proper age, teach the kids abstinence is the way that God wants, but also teach them that if they do have sex, to use protection. If I had kids, I would definantly teach them to use protection. Im more with using condoms than birth control, because I think condoms work better(in my opinion). But yeah, like me, I was a boy that grew up since i was a young boy "experimenting" with girls. And then when I was a teen, I had sex before marriage. And I know im not the only one. THere are many families like this. But anyways, thats what I think on it, and nobody ever taught me about protection, luckily I was smart. Well anyways. Use protection!
 
L

lil-rush

Guest
#15
I don't know if this is completely appropriate, but one time my sister and I were talking to my mom about this stuff and mom;s view on birth control came out in this conversation. I really think her idea is much smarter than birth control. She said (and I'm paraphrasing here): If you ever must be alone with a guy, work it out so the only time you're alone with him is when Aunt Flow is visiting.

On the subject of birth control, I also have issues with using it as a way to prevent pregnancy because, to me, it goes against scripture. God said to be fruitful and multiply. You can't very well do that if you are stopping the natural process of having babies.
 
G

gymmom714

Guest
#16
well this is a tough topic I believe in waitng until marriage before having sex. however, as everyone has said that is going to happen in a perfect world and we do not live in a perfect world. so I do believe in teaching your children to abstain until marriage, but I have also told them that if that is just not going to happen then by all means be smart and use protection, that ultimately it is their decision but they have been taught Gods ways and raised with the best morals I could give them and teach them as far as teaching Gods desire for them. So when my 18yr old ended up pregnant of course I was devestated and blamed myself, had all the normal feelings one probably goes through and loved her and stood by her with all of her decisions. My now 4y r old granddaughter is the joy of my life. My daughter did learn from her decision to have sex before marriage but she is a fantastic mother I must say. My son is now 19yr has his own decision to make. All you can do as a parent is teach them God's ideal plan and love them no matter what--but also be firm in that what decisions they make will effect their lives and many others too--
 

JustxJeena

Senior Member
Jun 27, 2007
153
1
18
36
#17
I think that parents should not only teach their Christian ideals of abstinence, but also be real enough with their kids so that they feel they can trust their parents and talk to them about anything and everything. My mother is not a Christian, but she has always been open enough with us so that we can talk to her if we need to... even about something as personal as sex. I think that's just as important as teaching them your ideals. I have a lot of friends who do not have a close relationship with their parents and would never talk to them about anything even close to sexual tendencies. I don't know. Basically, have a mutually trusting and close relationship with your kids so that they trust your advice and your judgment as far as anything goes.
 
G

GrrrrrRats

Guest
#18
Funny how God works at times. I've not chated or had any interest for years yet the first time I seek this site I come accross the exact subject that has rocked my wife and I for the SECOND time. Short story... all was great until the "18" thing came into play and then the kids just let loose with no regard or thought for consiquences. I have a 4.5 yr old grandson from my son and am now waiting on another from my daughter. Son was senior year in HS and daughter is 19.5 yrs old. I'm not one to feel sorry for myself but am truly stunned at this and have some strong feelings from bitterness towards God to second guessing our parenting and seemingly the failures we now have to flat out wanting to not see my kids again. I may not even come back to this room or session but thought I'd just put this out here hoping in someway I'd find God's presence. I have not stopped praying and was up at 2:30 am praying and stareing out at the darkest, coldest nights we've had in a long time. So there you have it. Time to face the world here shortly.

God bless
 

Godsrocker

Junior Member
Jan 20, 2006
25
0
0
#19
well first of all birth control pills dont take away cramps they just help to lighten a womans peiod so that in doing that it lessens the pain not sure about the acne though
 
C

christiangurlie

Guest
#20
Well put Lilrush. There are other circumstances where a girl may be put on birth control for imbalance or severe acne (I wondered about that when Topher mentioned "So, basically, using hormonal birth control as your sole means of preventing pregnancy results in a young baby being aborted once in a while. This is why a lot of doctors have qualms about prescribing birth control.)

In the end if you are raising your children the best you know how and they stray from the Godly upbringing then I agree they have to take responsibility and learn from it and know once again God loves them and forgives them.
yeah thats what i have to do...i had an issue with cysts a couple of months ago and my doctor put me on a type of birth control to quiet my ovaries so i havent had my period for like 3 months. on this im never supposed to have a period again.