Struggling Father-in-Law

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LeahK

Junior Member
Apr 8, 2018
2
0
1
#1
Hi Everyone!

So my husband and I have been struggling lately with how to deal with his Dad. His Dad claims to have been forced to attend church as a child which is why he doesn't attend now but he is an alcoholic, he has had multiple affairs, and is verbally abusive to all around him. He says his Christian music will get him to heaven and that he doesn't need to go to church. He argues with anyone who even brings up anything religious. He makes the comment that he knows more of the bible than anyone and doesn't need anyone preaching at him but his lifestyle is not conducive with going to heaven and my husband worries. He has made multiple comments in front of our children such as not wanting to hear my husband pray or say the blessing at dinner and even referring to the bible as garbage but gets irate when you question whether or not he is a believer like he claims. My husband's siblings have begun going to church with us but are being ridiculed for it so have not been wanting to go as much. They live to please my father-in-law for some reason. Yesterday, he got into a public argument with another family member on social media about not having to go to church to be a Christian and if you didn't know him, you would look at the conversation and wonder if he was a total non-believer. He is passionate about his disputes to the point that he yells and curses about it and everyone around him coddles him and protects him. It is beyond frustrating. I feel like I am often in the twilight zone.

My questions are this, are we (my husband and I) in the wrong? Are we being too pushy? How do we handle this family dynamic going forward considering we have 3 small children who adore their church?
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,116
3,530
113
59
#2
Hi Everyone!

So my husband and I have been struggling lately with how to deal with his Dad. His Dad claims to have been forced to attend church as a child which is why he doesn't attend now but he is an alcoholic, he has had multiple affairs, and is verbally abusive to all around him. He says his Christian music will get him to heaven and that he doesn't need to go to church. He argues with anyone who even brings up anything religious. He makes the comment that he knows more of the bible than anyone and doesn't need anyone preaching at him but his lifestyle is not conducive with going to heaven and my husband worries. He has made multiple comments in front of our children such as not wanting to hear my husband pray or say the blessing at dinner and even referring to the bible as garbage but gets irate when you question whether or not he is a believer like he claims. My husband's siblings have begun going to church with us but are being ridiculed for it so have not been wanting to go as much. They live to please my father-in-law for some reason. Yesterday, he got into a public argument with another family member on social media about not having to go to church to be a Christian and if you didn't know him, you would look at the conversation and wonder if he was a total non-believer. He is passionate about his disputes to the point that he yells and curses about it and everyone around him coddles him and protects him. It is beyond frustrating. I feel like I am often in the twilight zone.

My questions are this, are we (my husband and I) in the wrong? Are we being too pushy? How do we handle this family dynamic going forward considering we have 3 small children who adore their church?
Hi...
As a duty to your children , it is down to you and your husband to protect your children and yourselves from this type of abuse , so remove yourselves and pray and hand him over to God...

You cannot change this mans heart , only God can , he is going to bring you much misery in your relationship if you try to battle with him , remember , the battle is against the powers of darkness , not flesh and blood...

Jesus said He came to separate families from each other , just make sure you and hubby stick together like glue through this , keep in the word of God as your guidance , and He will direct your path...

If God is for you , who can be against you...xox...
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
4,032
2,933
113
#3
"And, again it should be of utmost understanding.....Acceptance and Forgiveness......vacant of
these two attributes there shall always be discord within a family environment. The only thing
we can change, is our own self. Our attitudes and behavior are ones own responsibility in living
life here in the now. By the grace of God, we strive to apply and live life with God's 'principles'
as our guiding 'light'. Being concerned of negative behavior of a loved one requires earnest
prayer time, and...Acceptance and Forgiveness...with love...believe it."
'Praise God'


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PERFECTION

Active member
Aug 14, 2019
222
63
28
#4
Hi...
As a duty to your children , it is down to you and your husband to protect your children and yourselves from this type of abuse , so remove yourselves and pray and hand him over to God...

You cannot change this mans heart , only God can , he is going to bring you much misery in your relationship if you try to battle with him , remember , the battle is against the powers of darkness , not flesh and blood...

Jesus said He came to separate families from each other , just make sure you and hubby stick together like glue through this , keep in the word of God as your guidance , and He will direct your path...

If God is for you , who can be against you...xox...
I was going to write my own post however I think Rosemary has said it very well.