Why does this annoy me so bad?

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StandStrong

Guest
#1
I listen to a wide range of christian music from worship soft rock to Christian heavy metal. My wife usually listens to the same especially when we listen to music together. Which i enjoy listening to music with my wife and hanging out with her. So why does it annoy me so much when she listens to her music while i am trying to study the bible? its not like our taste are that different and she at least quit listening to rap around me. yet even if she was playing the same song i was it still annoys me when she does it while i am studying the Word and i can not figure out why? does any of this make sense or am i just a rambling fool?


Sometimes it even gets to the point to where i can't study the Word anymore (at that paticular time).
 
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StandStrong

Guest
#2
I guess i should point out that I listen to music while i am studying. So i guess i am just baffled as to why it would annoy me so much that she would want to play music instead of listening to mine.
 
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tdrew777

Guest
#3
Sounds like you have developed a private area when you were single - just you and Jesus. You found a special place where everyone else would leave you alone. Your wife's music is invading that private space! It reminds you that you are not alone; it drives you crazy.

You have two options that I can see:
1) Learn to invite your wife (her music) into your quiet space. This will involve a lot of practice (brain research suggests that if you can do it 20 times in a row, you will not struggle so much again.) This, I would recommend because it minimizes stress on your wife that would exist if you isolated yourself.
2) Isolate yourself to study the bible. Your wife would have to know not to interrupt. You would have to limit your bible study time to serve your wife.
 

Aqua_Girl09

Senior Member
Jun 14, 2010
513
7
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#4
Just tell her whats on your mind. and ask if she can give you a little time for just you and God, I'm sure she'll be happy to know that you want to spend time with God and not be distracted. ^_^

 

Ariel82

Senior Member
Aug 8, 2011
16,931
428
83
#5
It gets on my nerves when I'm trying to listen to music or watch something and someone plays music or makes noise while I'm trying to concentrate. However, God has shown me that its not the other person's intent to annoy me but my personal problem that I'm that easy to annoy. Sometimes I think of the verses about how trials are God's way of teaching us patience.

On a practical note:
I would suggest headphones that block out all outside sound and a quiet place and regular time to do your bible study that your wife knows is special to you. I would limit it to no more than a couple hours a day and would also make some time for just you and your wife to show that she is special to you as well.
 
Oct 12, 2013
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#6
I guess i should point out that I listen to music while i am studying. So i guess i am just baffled as to why it would annoy me so much that she would want to play music instead of listening to mine.
It bothers you because there is resentment involved. See the resentment, tell your wife how you feel and get it out in the open.
It doesn't bother you, but, it does when your wife does it. Why? because you are resenting your wife probably for other reasons you are not aware of.
 
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StandStrong

Guest
#7
It bothers you because there is resentment involved. See the resentment, tell your wife how you feel and get it out in the open.
It doesn't bother you, but, it does when your wife does it. Why? because you are resenting your wife probably for other reasons you are not aware of.
i don't resent my wife. however we have spoken about it and reached a compromise
 
Oct 12, 2013
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#8
i don't resent my wife. however we have spoken about it and reached a compromise[/QUOTE

That is great.
My point is when we hold back till we get annoyed we begin to resent.
Speaking upsooner is always the best way.