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I started writing a novel about my childhood a while ago. It's a comedy and nonfictional. I had a pretty great childhood and it was very adventurous sometimes. I haven't touched that document in years...but it's always in the back of my mind. I recently moved back to the small town I grew up in...so the memories are flooding back. I think it's a good time to finish it.
So basically it's about an average 9 year old, living in a border town, growing up with a single mother, a pesky little brother and a grandma with old fashioned values. School can be difficult because of bullies and teachers that seem to hate her. The only good thing is the trio of best friends that she has. After school, her and her little brother have adventures with neighborhood friends where they sometimes get into mischief.
I read the whole series, then found out was mostly written with the help of Laura's daughter Rose. I remember one book, think it was called Farmer Boy, about Almanzo, Laura's eventual husband, who at 9 years old. skipped school to work on the farm, and he had to do everything from feeding the animals to churning butter to getting his shoes made by a cobbler, and it was just page after page of farm chores lol
And he never got paid. He wanted to work in town and be a shopkeeper but his father forbade him. A hard life eh.
My latest paperback read is called The Husbands Secret by Liane Moriarty
Its about a catholic housewife who accidentally finds a an envelope that her husband wrote on the outside 'to my wife to open on event of my death'
Her husband is away on a business trip - he's not dead
should she open it?
well I dont know I only read the first chapter.
what could possibly be the husbands secret he can only tell her after he's dead. its 402 pages. should I keep reading...?
Dont tell me her husband has been two timing her all this time and has whole nother family hes stringing along....or maybe its just instructions for a cremation or something, like maybe he only pretended to be a catholic and didnt really believe the pope was infallible. Who knows?!
the plot thickens..well chapter 2 I was partly right except this happened with another different of characters whereby the wife finds out her husband has just fallen in love with her cousin who used to be fat but slimmed down, so they both tell her to her face 'we've fallen in love' and she's like wot.
Oh, they say...but we havent DONE anything...yet.
I, the reader, am so perplexd at this turn of events and its only chapter 2.
Then in chapter 3 a grandmother is shocked at the news that her son and his wife are moving to NYC for a job promotion for the wife and taking her grandson with them. She was expecting them to tell her we are having another grandchild so she can play grandmother. Oh, they say we will just hire a nanny in new york.
now this couple is entirely unrelated to the couple in chapters 1 and 2
the only thing that is tying all these couples together is the fact that they all watch The Biggest Loser on tv and they are all Australians.
I am sorry Liane Moriarity but why must you name the husband 'John-Paul' ? and could you just stick with ONE name?
(people yell at their tvs, I can yell at the paperback books Im reading)
It would be like naming my muslim character Muhammad.
I just had an idea for the sequel 'the wifes secret'. To get back at her pseudo-catholic husband, after his run in with the Jesuits who annul the marriage, the wife remarries this time to a muslim but has to keep her identity secret. So she becomes this super devout muslim wife but instead of facing Mecca each time she prays she faces the Vatican. But nobody knows because she says her inner GPS is a bit out, and her new husband already has 3 other wives so hes not always checking.
Ok **spoiler*** I could have seen this coming but I was distracted by the other 3 couples narrative to notice that Liane Moriarity inserted a clever one page chapter of a murder mystery that if you blinked you would have missed.
Of course, life for a life in this middle class suburban existence means the perpatrators will NOT go to jail. They will simply have to live with Catholic guilt for the rest of their lives.
I had no idea catholicism was an alternative to jail time! What other sins are easily expiated with some hail marys?
I just read on librarian list-serv that this was a pet peeves of spouses married to librarians.
I must say though the paperpack I am now reading is very good. It is called Memory by Margaret Mahy.
I had forgotten just how well Margaret Mahy can tell a story. Its about a 19'year old called Danny whos haunted by his sister falling to her death five years ago. He ends up tracing her steps which leads him to randomly coming across a home belonging to an elderly lady called Sophie , who is suffering from alzheimers. She mistakes him for someone from HER past.
Margaret Mahy actually WAS a librarian but gave up that job to be a writer, though she definitely put the effort in writing at nighttime when everyone was asleep. Apparently she was a bit eccentric but then most writers are.
I had suspicions she was a word witch like JK Rowling because most of her writing had supernatural themes but cant fault the actual writing. If she'd written for a more adult audience I dont know if her stories would have the same charm though. Anyway.
I always remember growing up if you were to read any childrens book it would be a choice of Margaret Mahy, Maurice Gee or Roald Dahl. They all had elements of the fantastic in them. I guess when one writes for adults you just lose that imagination where in a childs world, ANYTHING could happen.
This time its a book called 'The Dating Game'
The set up is a wealthy Connecticut housewife, two kids leaving for college, and her husband decides to divorce her for being 'boring' and go he goes off with someone 15 years younger after 25 years of marriage.
Yep. I dont know how Ms Steel comes up with these plots. The rest of the novel is about the newly single divorced wife dating again and starting a new life
I want to write a novel where horrible things actually happen to unrepentant adulterers and they go to to special compartment of hell where they are tortured for eternity by being stoned by their own children and ex spouses.
? ok heres the twist *spoiler*
after dating many inappropriate men the heroine suddenly decides she wants to adopt a baby girl
it doesnt matter that her daugher might be having. a grandchild or her ex husbands new wife now has also has a baby
she wants one too
so she will never be lonely cos of course, an adopted baby will love you forever. Plus she has enough money to pay a nurse.
And I am pretty sure that the guy shes not interested in though perfect on paper, suddenly now decides he wants to be a dad.
this is just too neat....plus..the adopted babys mother had to give her up because she had too many children and HER husband cheats on her too. And, Danielle Steel never fails to mention that all her prospective adopted children have blonde and blue eyes.
hmm I think I would have preferred it if her heroine got a pet tiger or something. Either that found Jesus who would never leave nor forsake her instead of paying a shrink, renting out her house, moving to San Francisco, and working as an assistant to a gay party planner, dating around and then suddenly buying a baby.
During the past year I have read many of his books and currently reading one now, (First Lady). Haven't seen the Dolly Parton collaberation. My wife got a lot of the Roberts books through various thrift stores. She probably paid for a few too. She has other books from other woman authors too, mostly romance.