Patience is virtue, but.....

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
T

toinena

Guest
#1
I have to admit I have started to feel old.
I am babysitting two kids this week during their (and my well deserved) fall break. And I am exhausted! It is only Wednesday, and I feel I am more tired now than before the break. The boy just plays PS4 and watches youtube videoes. Except when I try to sleep. Then he runs up and down the stairs, running around the table running up and down the stairs, dropping a tennisball upstairs, runs a bit more, much more! They have three simple chores. Brush the dogs, walk them twice a day and start the roomba and empty the container afterwards. Not that the world falls a part if they don't do them, but still. It is quite annoying to ask 5 times for each chore and nothing happens. The girl tries to help, but it just doesn't work.

I had set rules when they came. Not too tough. Just saying that bedtime (or stay in bed time) is 11pm, and you have to eat breakfast before noon. How hard can that be?

They are not raised Christians, and then are both saying they are gay. What is wrong with this world? They are tweens! They know I am a Christian, but they don't like that, of course.

I am running out of patience here. And I do start to feel old. How far do I stretch myself for others and how much do I have to tolerate from other people's kids. The worst thing is the mother got upset that I told her, and said she will not come to our traditional Christmas celebration. Because I have my faith, my love and my own house. She can't stand that.

To sum it up. I need patience! I need to be filled with a supernatural love and understanding. I need Christ. (and seriously! That family needs it, too!)

Okay. Venting is done. How do you guys handle other people's kids? Especially when they are not brought up in the Christian faith?
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
1,485
1,251
113
#2
Well I don't think the kids moral and spiritual well being fall under your concern as a babysitter. Not that you can't have feelings on the matter, but it's simply not your place.
The rest of it is not really a spiritual issue. Some Christian's are horrible parents. Some non-Christians are great parents (and vice versa obviously) so the issue with behavior os a reflection on how the parent raises the children.

If, as a babysitter, I were dealing with another's children I would treat them very much like my own. Granted disciplinary actions and what you can/can't do may need to he discussed, as well as what discipline the parent will provide in relation to being disobedient to you. Otherwise, behaviorally, those kids are mine for the time. And long as I don't cross a boundary set by the parent them I'm going to show I'm in charge.

Ot seems the great difficulty here is that you are babysitting for someone with different moral, spiritual And behavioral standards than you. So you may not receive the support/back up from the parent.
A rambunctious boy will probably be difficult for you to handle. Especially one seeming to lack some discipline.
Often it seems the easiest way to affect a child is to earn their respect. Getting down to their level, so to speak, and engaging them where they're at. Once you establish a connection with a child that way, especially if no one else does, they will often be more responsive to you and less defiant.
 

LightBright

Senior Member
Mar 18, 2017
2,152
838
113
19
#3
I have to admit I have started to feel old.
I am babysitting two kids this week during their (and my well deserved) fall break. And I am exhausted! It is only Wednesday, and I feel I am more tired now than before the break. The boy just plays PS4 and watches youtube videoes. Except when I try to sleep. Then he runs up and down the stairs, running around the table running up and down the stairs, dropping a tennisball upstairs, runs a bit more, much more! They have three simple chores. Brush the dogs, walk them twice a day and start the roomba and empty the container afterwards. Not that the world falls a part if they don't do them, but still. It is quite annoying to ask 5 times for each chore and nothing happens. The girl tries to help, but it just doesn't work.

I had set rules when they came. Not too tough. Just saying that bedtime (or stay in bed time) is 11pm, and you have to eat breakfast before noon. How hard can that be?

They are not raised Christians, and then are both saying they are gay. What is wrong with this world? They are tweens! They know I am a Christian, but they don't like that, of course.

I am running out of patience here. And I do start to feel old. How far do I stretch myself for others and how much do I have to tolerate from other people's kids. The worst thing is the mother got upset that I told her, and said she will not come to our traditional Christmas celebration. Because I have my faith, my love and my own house. She can't stand that.

To sum it up. I need patience! I need to be filled with a supernatural love and understanding. I need Christ. (and seriously! That family needs it, too!)

Okay. Venting is done. How do you guys handle other people's kids? Especially when they are not brought up in the Christian faith?
I watch kids a lot and should be watching them this weekend so yea i can totally say a thing. First, if you're gonna watch someone elses kids tell them, before you they throw them off to you, ground rules. If i can't discipline the kid in some way we can't work together fam, if i can't be a CHRISTIAN around your kids Bye, as soon as you send them into my care I'm gonna treat them like they are basically family. Now i will be a lot more lenient admittedly and i will follow specific rules they tell me to follow fpr their kids unless they go against my faith somehow or just aren't realistic. Dealing with kids is hard it's even worse when you have to try not to step on the parents toes especially when it comes to discipline. For example one of my sister's is "gay" so her children are influenced by that naturally but i still tell them about God and i tell them homosexuality is wrong and if she doesn't like that she can find Someone else im not a buffet you don't pick what you want I'm more like chikfila or something you have some options but you cant get any fried rice from me fam and if you want Chinese food go away...so yea idk that's how i feel but i have been left with kids unwillingly and then i tend to be a lot more careful with them only cuz i haven't always known much about the parents or anything but even then you're not just going to come in here with something i can't handle because that's not safe and I'm not taking care of kids if i have to try and hide anything dealing with Christianity but that's just me. I recommend being more direct and firm with how you take care of them and your faith because if they are too difficult to handle it could be dangerous to take care of them rather it affects you or them. And if you have to hide Jesus well that ones just not coo so ye.
 
T

toinena

Guest
#4
Wow. Thank you! Yes. I should be more clear on having ground rules also when it comes to my faith.
 

Lighthearted

Senior Member
Oct 17, 2016
1,233
354
83
49
#5
I have to admit I have started to feel old.
I am babysitting two kids this week during their (and my well deserved) fall break. And I am exhausted! It is only Wednesday, and I feel I am more tired now than before the break. The boy just plays PS4 and watches youtube videoes. Except when I try to sleep. Then he runs up and down the stairs, running around the table running up and down the stairs, dropping a tennisball upstairs, runs a bit more, much more! They have three simple chores. Brush the dogs, walk them twice a day and start the roomba and empty the container afterwards. Not that the world falls a part if they don't do them, but still. It is quite annoying to ask 5 times for each chore and nothing happens. The girl tries to help, but it just doesn't work.

I had set rules when they came. Not too tough. Just saying that bedtime (or stay in bed time) is 11pm, and you have to eat breakfast before noon. How hard can that be?

They are not raised Christians, and then are both saying they are gay. What is wrong with this world? They are tweens! They know I am a Christian, but they don't like that, of course.

I am running out of patience here. And I do start to feel old. How far do I stretch myself for others and how much do I have to tolerate from other people's kids. The worst thing is the mother got upset that I told her, and said she will not come to our traditional Christmas celebration. Because I have my faith, my love and my own house. She can't stand that.

To sum it up. I need patience! I need to be filled with a supernatural love and understanding. I need Christ. (and seriously! That family needs it, too!)

Okay. Venting is done. How do you guys handle other people's kids? Especially when they are not brought up in the Christian faith?


OH GIRL!!!! DONT PRAY FOR PATIENCE!!!! LOL
THAT IS ONE VERY LONG HARD TRIAL!!!! It brings you more of what youre trying to deal with...maybe ask God to show you a different way to approach these head strong kids. DR, James Dobson says that with the Strong willed child you dont let them win any battle when they know what your rules are. You know older kids respond to doing what they are supposed to or losing priviledges.
I have had a single dad of 5 that he raised tell me he tried to treat them as if they were someone elses kids at summer camp. pffft!
I honestly am searching as I have the 22 year old that was a breeze when I was 25....and now the 5 year old headstrong child I had at 42...(I made the mistake of praying for the "p" word...shhhh)
I guess try to remember why you offered to do this in the first place? LOL...love ya
 

SweetStars

Active member
Oct 6, 2018
110
97
28
29
Arizona
#6
That is a though one, i feel your pain. What normally works for me while babysitting is being respectful, use a low tone of voice (never show anger or frustration on the voice, even if you feel it, i know is hard >.<), learning what things they like (sports, music, ballet, video games, etc), if they like to play sports, play sports with them, if they like to play console video games, play with them or at least show interest in it. Most kids appreciate the respect and that you show that their thoughts and ideas matter.
 

Miri

The Thingy Member
Jul 22, 2012
9,253
2,253
113
UK age 51
#7
If I was baby sitting someone in my own house and they were tweens.
They should be old enough to be able to stick to rules and routine.
The parents should also appreciate that you will not compromise your faith just
to look after their little darlings.

If the above cannot and does not work out, then don't babysit for them again.